.....
I have no words that can explain my feelings truly and fully. I have to way of expressing my sadness. Nor a way to tell my joy in all its honesty.
I can still speak. I can do that much. Even if I never get the chance to talk to these people; even if my words and feelings never reach them; I still want to express them somehow to someone. I will write these words here and I'm my personal journal and hope and pray that they are carried to the people I care about.
The first are to my family. Who have loved and cared for me without hating the person I am. Though they may not have understood me they still loved me none the less.
Shane. I am sorry for being such a stupid older brother. I'm sorry I was never there when you needed me the most. I'm sorry I ran from our father. I'm sorry I left you alone.
Sammy. I've hurt you so much, but you've outgrown me already and I am proud of you. Against the odds you are growing up to be a fine man, and a person that I know people will want to be around.
Mother, and father. I'm sorry I was so selfish. I'm sorry I have been angry for so long about your lives and your dreams. I'm just too selfish it seems. I wanted all your love and attention like I had when I was little, but just never opened my eyes to see that I was getting yours and that from other. Sorry.
Kenny. We've known each other for over 20 years now. I'm sorry for all the crap I've put you through and I have always been glad that we've been friends for so long.
JoAnna. I'm an idiot. I was such an idiot and still am. I'm sorry for hurting you more than anyone I know. I'm sorry for misunderstanding myself and my feelings and hurting you so much. Please be happy....
Miriam. ^_^ sorry for just being me and not being able to help you and understand you better. I hope we get to hang out again.
Jon....Jess. I've always felt like such a burden to you two, and though you might say I never have I know that's not true....but I'm just so thankful to be here with you now and to have known and be able to be around you for as long as I have. Seeing you together always gives me hope that even someone like me can find someone else to be with and be happy with even if I don't think I deserve such a thing anymore.
Adam, Jim, Z, Missy. I've not forgotten you all, but I'm afraid that you have of me. I hope we can meet again as well.
Brett, Jeromey, Clinton. We've lost each other haven't we? I can't find you. So I will never forget you!
Mab ^^ I look forward to making memories getting to know you and Immer should we ever meet. I think we will have fun.
Eric. Smartest guy I've gotten to know so far. heh You better keep helping others and move more people into a future with heads on their shoulders.
I love everyone here, and will always hope and pray for your happiness.
hehe I think that's enough crying for one night.
I can still speak. I can do that much. Even if I never get the chance to talk to these people; even if my words and feelings never reach them; I still want to express them somehow to someone. I will write these words here and I'm my personal journal and hope and pray that they are carried to the people I care about.
The first are to my family. Who have loved and cared for me without hating the person I am. Though they may not have understood me they still loved me none the less.
Shane. I am sorry for being such a stupid older brother. I'm sorry I was never there when you needed me the most. I'm sorry I ran from our father. I'm sorry I left you alone.
Sammy. I've hurt you so much, but you've outgrown me already and I am proud of you. Against the odds you are growing up to be a fine man, and a person that I know people will want to be around.
Mother, and father. I'm sorry I was so selfish. I'm sorry I have been angry for so long about your lives and your dreams. I'm just too selfish it seems. I wanted all your love and attention like I had when I was little, but just never opened my eyes to see that I was getting yours and that from other. Sorry.
Kenny. We've known each other for over 20 years now. I'm sorry for all the crap I've put you through and I have always been glad that we've been friends for so long.
JoAnna. I'm an idiot. I was such an idiot and still am. I'm sorry for hurting you more than anyone I know. I'm sorry for misunderstanding myself and my feelings and hurting you so much. Please be happy....
Miriam. ^_^ sorry for just being me and not being able to help you and understand you better. I hope we get to hang out again.
Jon....Jess. I've always felt like such a burden to you two, and though you might say I never have I know that's not true....but I'm just so thankful to be here with you now and to have known and be able to be around you for as long as I have. Seeing you together always gives me hope that even someone like me can find someone else to be with and be happy with even if I don't think I deserve such a thing anymore.
Adam, Jim, Z, Missy. I've not forgotten you all, but I'm afraid that you have of me. I hope we can meet again as well.
Brett, Jeromey, Clinton. We've lost each other haven't we? I can't find you. So I will never forget you!
Mab ^^ I look forward to making memories getting to know you and Immer should we ever meet. I think we will have fun.
Eric. Smartest guy I've gotten to know so far. heh You better keep helping others and move more people into a future with heads on their shoulders.
I love everyone here, and will always hope and pray for your happiness.
hehe I think that's enough crying for one night.