After a dramatic scene with my mom and grandma when Mom found my suitcases in her trunk during a trip to Keokuk, where I planned to catch a bus to the St. Louis temple, I was finally on my way. Grandma said she wouldn't give me my birthday government savings bonds she'd purchased for me every year if I left and I told her she could keep her money; ( Read more... )

Years ago I took a moment to reflect on what writing about Mahasraya was like, having to capture how I felt and thought about him in the past versus my more mature understanding as I recovered from the abuse and gained the perspective of greater life experience. Here is the link to that post:http

I found out a few days ago that my first husband died of a blood clot on May 31st. Apparently he had a complication from a surgery and returned to the hospital and was in critical condition before he died. He was 4 years older than I am, born on September 26, 1954 ( Read more... )

I applaud Dylan for coming forward as an adult to speak her truth, especially since the prosecutor decided not to go forward with her case because of the trauma for her (especially in a high profile family). She deserved her day in court but I guess her day in public is the next best thing ( Read more... )

My daughter was telling me that her half-siblings and stepmom think I'm crazy. Now that's a broad term and can mean different things to different people. If used to mean mentally ill, well I'm clinically depressed and have been off and on for many years. I don't see that as a shameful thing, no more so than my heart disease. But I asked her what ( Read more... )

Here is the latest installment of my series, Patriarchy Across Cultures, at the No Longer Quivering blog, entitled Kung Fu Fighting. I explain that my abuser was, curiously, teaching me how to defend myself.

Today at No Longer Quivering, Vyckie answers critics who ask her why she's dwelling on the past and why can't she just move on? It's a question we both get, so I'll include my answer here. I touched on this a few weeks ago, which in part inspired her post, which inspired me to re-visit it ( Read more... )

In my writing lately I have covered my grandfather's attempted (or accomplished, I don't know) abuse of his step-daughters and my ex-husband's molestation of my daughter at the age of 8. One of the first reactions a lot of people have to such information, if they know the people involved, is that X didn't seem like a pedophile. Look, he's married! ( Read more... )

The latest installment in my continuing story on No Longer Quivering is Smiling Faces. I learn way more than I wanted to know about a family secret, then fight to save my baby from a serious infection. Going home to my abusive husband seemed almost peaceful after that. Almost.

Previously, I described how I left for Iowa as an absolute last resort, my children starving at Leo Carrillo State Park. I settled in to life in Iowa, got my own apartment, and continued to correspond with and talk to Mahasraya on the phone. I had agreed to return if he got us a place to live, and I fervently hoped that he would.In January of 1982 ( Read more... )