The Best Drabble Ever Written
There was a Lunar Eclipse tonight. It was shiny and red. Thought I'd tell you that just in case, you know, you haven't looked out the window over the past few hours or listened to the radio over the past couple of day. Seriously though, would you guys in the Northern hemisphere be able to see it or not? I suppose not... hmm... Well, it was pretty.
On another note, I now present the best crack-tastic fic ever written. Thanks to whoever it was from the beexsam community that found and mentioned it.
You have to try this out though. It's so much fun. http://prillalar.com/drabbles/
This one was using words from my Biggs/Wedge fanfic Yes Sir... but it didn't turn out anything like I'd planned. It turned out better.
The Fast Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Wedge strode along the path, making for Insignificant Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Broken Book, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Eye.
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his creative guitar just in time to face the beautiful man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The man struck softly, and Wedge barely raised his guitar to meet the attack. They fought long and crazily until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
At last, Wedge found himself forced to one knee, the man's guitar pressed to his lovely ear. "I am Biggs of Insignificant Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Broken Book. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you on stage."
But Wedge had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his guitar with a twist, overpowered Biggs and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Wedge said, looking down upon him.
Biggs's leg shimmered like Julia singing in her prime. "I have underestimated you, Wedge. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Wedge's desire was enflamed. His ear throbbed and all his thoughts were to play Biggs like a cat. Wedge caressed Biggs's smelly leg and he responded. They came together angrily, and their joining was as shiny as their battle, and also much louder.
"Ah, my sweet plushie!" Wedge groaned and played Biggs as quietly as he could.
"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Wedge said. "That's where I put the Broken Book for safekeeping. Sorry."
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed lovingly on the grass, forgetful of all but their wet love. "We will stay together forever," Biggs said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Eye never got the Broken Book and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.
edited to add this amazing piece of work...
I swear, this one almost makes sense for the fandom. (At least Stacey will get it...)
And oh dear... the violent snow-woman thing? An accidental Tex reference perhaps? I'm not sure...
The Loud Terror Of The Snow
It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Sarge and Caboose went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Sarge hit Caboose in his hand with a big carefree iceball. It hurt a lot, but Sarge kissed it angrily and then it was all better.
Then they decided to make a snow man.
"We'll make a really fluffy snow man!" Sarge said.
"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Caboose said. "That would be more violent and politically correct."
"I know," Sarge said. "We can make a snow puppy. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics." (I can so imagine Sarge actually saying this to Caboose.)
So they rolled the snow up absentmindedly and made a shiny snow puppy. Sarge put on a gun for the arm. The puppy was almost as big as Caboose.
"It looks painful," Sarge said gruffly. "But it seems like it's missing something."
"Here," Caboose said and held up a hilarious helmet. "I found this in the jeep." He put the helmet onto the puppy's head.
It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the puppy, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like Tucker in a girls only gym. (OMFG! I love how this line turned out!)
Caboose screamed irresponsibly and ran but the snow puppy chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow puppy tickled him innocently.
"Nobody does that to my little Glittery Tank," Sarge screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow puppy through the foot. It fell down and Sarge kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.
"You saved me!" Caboose said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.
The helmet lay in the yard until a dirty child picked it up and took it home.
On another note, I now present the best crack-tastic fic ever written. Thanks to whoever it was from the beexsam community that found and mentioned it.
You have to try this out though. It's so much fun. http://prillalar.com/drabbles/
This one was using words from my Biggs/Wedge fanfic Yes Sir... but it didn't turn out anything like I'd planned. It turned out better.
The Fast Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Wedge strode along the path, making for Insignificant Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Broken Book, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Eye.
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his creative guitar just in time to face the beautiful man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The man struck softly, and Wedge barely raised his guitar to meet the attack. They fought long and crazily until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
At last, Wedge found himself forced to one knee, the man's guitar pressed to his lovely ear. "I am Biggs of Insignificant Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Broken Book. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you on stage."
But Wedge had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his guitar with a twist, overpowered Biggs and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Wedge said, looking down upon him.
Biggs's leg shimmered like Julia singing in her prime. "I have underestimated you, Wedge. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Wedge's desire was enflamed. His ear throbbed and all his thoughts were to play Biggs like a cat. Wedge caressed Biggs's smelly leg and he responded. They came together angrily, and their joining was as shiny as their battle, and also much louder.
"Ah, my sweet plushie!" Wedge groaned and played Biggs as quietly as he could.
"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Wedge said. "That's where I put the Broken Book for safekeeping. Sorry."
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed lovingly on the grass, forgetful of all but their wet love. "We will stay together forever," Biggs said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Eye never got the Broken Book and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.
edited to add this amazing piece of work...
I swear, this one almost makes sense for the fandom. (At least Stacey will get it...)
And oh dear... the violent snow-woman thing? An accidental Tex reference perhaps? I'm not sure...
The Loud Terror Of The Snow
It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Sarge and Caboose went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Sarge hit Caboose in his hand with a big carefree iceball. It hurt a lot, but Sarge kissed it angrily and then it was all better.
Then they decided to make a snow man.
"We'll make a really fluffy snow man!" Sarge said.
"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Caboose said. "That would be more violent and politically correct."
"I know," Sarge said. "We can make a snow puppy. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics." (I can so imagine Sarge actually saying this to Caboose.)
So they rolled the snow up absentmindedly and made a shiny snow puppy. Sarge put on a gun for the arm. The puppy was almost as big as Caboose.
"It looks painful," Sarge said gruffly. "But it seems like it's missing something."
"Here," Caboose said and held up a hilarious helmet. "I found this in the jeep." He put the helmet onto the puppy's head.
It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the puppy, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like Tucker in a girls only gym. (OMFG! I love how this line turned out!)
Caboose screamed irresponsibly and ran but the snow puppy chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow puppy tickled him innocently.
"Nobody does that to my little Glittery Tank," Sarge screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow puppy through the foot. It fell down and Sarge kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.
"You saved me!" Caboose said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.
The helmet lay in the yard until a dirty child picked it up and took it home.