(no subject)
Today was a bad day. All night I dreamed about New Zealand and hanging out with my friends there, eating at all our old haunts and joking around. Then I woke up feeling really weighed down by loneliness and there's no one to talk to. I miss everyone so much and I can't help but feel that I won't see a lot of them ever again. I watched a bunch of the farewell videos that Matt (Matt from Iowa, not my Matt) made for us when we left. I just want to go back so desperately, to laze around at Sumner beach, or go surfing at New Brighton, or even just have another meal at the Asian Food Court. I can't shake this feeling that those four months were some of the best of my life and I'll never get them back. How did they slip by so quickly? I was looking at my pictures from the first trip to Sumner and remembering how the whole time just stretched out infinitely in front of us. We had all the time in the world then, and now it's gone. I can't express how hard it is to leave a place you know as home, knowing that you may never see it again, and even if you do, it will never be the same.
So here I sit, holed up all alone in my little room in Ithaca, dreaming of a place 5000 miles away that won't ever exist again.
So here I sit, holed up all alone in my little room in Ithaca, dreaming of a place 5000 miles away that won't ever exist again.