eddie murphy
sometimes finished some anecdotes with "...and two drops of pee came out."
it was his hyperlative term for something funny.
this morning i dreamed of winning exactly $9.5 million dollars (amazingly, after-tax).
the first thing i did was call my mom. then i actually stared at the check a few minutes after i picked it up at some teller window. well regarding the murphy reference, i proceeded to pee a few drops in my underwear. that's why i woke up.
hehehe, but that's not the point of writing this.
here's the breakdown of how i would spend almost $10 million US -
1) to the frustration of my own family, $1 million would be immediately reserved to divide amongst the people in my LJ friends list. i know. "wowowow," since i don't know most people on my list. it's obviously nice to suddenly have $43,478 land on your head metaphorically, or physically (if you really want). why not use my friends list to initiate some arbitrary cutoff for which strangers get this weird bonus from another planet? i think i'd give this amount away to strangers anyway.
2) $5 million would be used to buy the machinery of banyan foods' dreams. we need new machinery for a proposed soymilk line. we need this one machine to put pineapple tomato sauce into little ketchup bags.
3) $1 million would be used for my brother's medical school. i hope that's enough for 8 years of stethoscope training.
4) $2.5 million would be used to retire my mom. she could use it to buy a house, with/out change left over. she could use it to support my $5,000/yr mango habit. buy a BMW or some other "i made it" car. i know she wouldn't use it to travel, b/c she wouldn't travel alone.
that's it.
a full-blown (nuts, cherries plus whipped cream), three scoop, banana split once (or twice) every 6 months. the availability of a gym during the week. asian food within driving distance. a roof. some clothes. a state in the union that has up to 200 candidates to run for governor. unending political stances to decide upon. i get all of this already. it's already haute-middle class. i don't require anything else, and could most definitely make do with less.
it was his hyperlative term for something funny.
this morning i dreamed of winning exactly $9.5 million dollars (amazingly, after-tax).
the first thing i did was call my mom. then i actually stared at the check a few minutes after i picked it up at some teller window. well regarding the murphy reference, i proceeded to pee a few drops in my underwear. that's why i woke up.
hehehe, but that's not the point of writing this.
here's the breakdown of how i would spend almost $10 million US -
1) to the frustration of my own family, $1 million would be immediately reserved to divide amongst the people in my LJ friends list. i know. "wowowow," since i don't know most people on my list. it's obviously nice to suddenly have $43,478 land on your head metaphorically, or physically (if you really want). why not use my friends list to initiate some arbitrary cutoff for which strangers get this weird bonus from another planet? i think i'd give this amount away to strangers anyway.
2) $5 million would be used to buy the machinery of banyan foods' dreams. we need new machinery for a proposed soymilk line. we need this one machine to put pineapple tomato sauce into little ketchup bags.
3) $1 million would be used for my brother's medical school. i hope that's enough for 8 years of stethoscope training.
4) $2.5 million would be used to retire my mom. she could use it to buy a house, with/out change left over. she could use it to support my $5,000/yr mango habit. buy a BMW or some other "i made it" car. i know she wouldn't use it to travel, b/c she wouldn't travel alone.
that's it.
a full-blown (nuts, cherries plus whipped cream), three scoop, banana split once (or twice) every 6 months. the availability of a gym during the week. asian food within driving distance. a roof. some clothes. a state in the union that has up to 200 candidates to run for governor. unending political stances to decide upon. i get all of this already. it's already haute-middle class. i don't require anything else, and could most definitely make do with less.