095. Need
*
He can feel the blood congealing in his veins. Strange how one becomes accustomed to the fast pace of blood, accustomed to the hard beating of one’s heart. Because now Schuldig cannot imagine his blood battering his capillaries, his arteries and veins, any faster than it does now. He sees his body as it was with wonder: how did he not cry out at the rushing of blood? How did his heart not beat its way out of his frail body? And it is frail now. He has not walked in three weeks. His fingers have ceased moving on command. To open his eyes is a struggle. He has lain in his bed, tubes and needles pricking and pushing through his skin, for the past week. He cannot chew food. He cannot drink water.
He is dying, and he welcomes that death.
They’ll bring him back, well-wishers tell him. They’ll find him.
But he knows the truth. He has only his mind left, and the ears and eyes that people think have dulled with the rest of his body. He knows they’ve already found Ran. He knows they killed him for “seducing his better” in a cornfield off the Takatori plantation.
He felt the death even here, miles away. It was clear as a gunshot to the temple, and the impact knocked Schuldig to the ground. He lay there, eyelashes catching on the carpet and hip twisted awkward and painful, for the hours it took the help to dare enter his study. Now he is in bed, forced to breathe, eat, live. He thinks maybe it isn’t so bad. Maybe, if he stays in the same place long enough, Ran will find a way back to him, free and willing to submit.
And maybe in hell there is a place made just for them.
~*~
Notes: yes, another slavefic -_- also, a strangefic. two for the price of one, you get.