Scapegoat
The other day I realized something: retail people are the one-night stands for angry people. Bear with me, here; I think the analogy works. People sometimes just really want to get mad at someone, chew someone out or be rude or commanding or whatever. But they can't do it to their bosses. They (usually) don't want to do it to their families and friends. So what's left? The entities that are serving them, at a restaurant or store or library or whatever. I use "entities" because I don't think most people think of retail workers as "people." That's one reason they feel they can chew them out and be rude with impunity: they're JUST cashiers. Or JUST waiters and waitresses. Or JUST whatever. They can do whatever they want and really, we can't do anything to do them. We just smile and take it. Then they leave with all their aggression spent and go their merry way, feeling none the worse for it. Because, after all, we're one-night stands. They use us and leave us. It's kind of dehumanizing, sometimes.
Work has really made me struggle with developing a servant's heart. I know I am where I am right now for a reason, and I know we're supposed to work at everything as if we're working for the Lord. And I know that we're supposed to serve people anyway, so having a job that forces me to do it should just make it that much easier, right? Nope. I have to struggle daily with thinking snarky comments about customers, or getting frustrated or angry or irritated. Or feeling helpless and/or worthless. Sometimes I think "it's just a temporary retail job!" but it's really not. It's a source of internal struggle.
My brother turns twenty on Thursday. Someone is covering my hours so I get to go to his party! I'm very excited about it.
We made flannel board characters tonight in Kiddie Lit.
In other news, Lucas is my ultimate hero and knight in shining armor. He's way too good to me, especially when it comes to doing my dishes and helping me with my myriad of parking troubles (of which I had more tonight coming back from class.) I need to do something special for him. May everyone find such an amazingly wonderful man.
ETA: I totally forgot to mention the wonderful time I had this weekend when irked_indeed came over to visit. My work schedule was astonishingly light so I got to spend time with him and The Amazing Liltator, which included watching a very bad MST3K and the entire Gulliver's Travels miniseries. We also went to church and ate.
Work has really made me struggle with developing a servant's heart. I know I am where I am right now for a reason, and I know we're supposed to work at everything as if we're working for the Lord. And I know that we're supposed to serve people anyway, so having a job that forces me to do it should just make it that much easier, right? Nope. I have to struggle daily with thinking snarky comments about customers, or getting frustrated or angry or irritated. Or feeling helpless and/or worthless. Sometimes I think "it's just a temporary retail job!" but it's really not. It's a source of internal struggle.
My brother turns twenty on Thursday. Someone is covering my hours so I get to go to his party! I'm very excited about it.
We made flannel board characters tonight in Kiddie Lit.
In other news, Lucas is my ultimate hero and knight in shining armor. He's way too good to me, especially when it comes to doing my dishes and helping me with my myriad of parking troubles (of which I had more tonight coming back from class.) I need to do something special for him. May everyone find such an amazingly wonderful man.
ETA: I totally forgot to mention the wonderful time I had this weekend when irked_indeed came over to visit. My work schedule was astonishingly light so I got to spend time with him and The Amazing Liltator, which included watching a very bad MST3K and the entire Gulliver's Travels miniseries. We also went to church and ate.