(no subject)

[taechay]

tumbling down again
not knowing what's what
maybe despair
or idiocy
I seem unable
to know
I try to put my palms
on the reader that grants access
denied, denied
my mind says with a robotic voice

my mind shakes like an old leaf
that got caught in the wind
but with one part frozen to the ground

I feel like shit
I feel weak

this isn't depression
I think this has a cause
but I don't know which is it
and the smiles I give to other people
shine down upon me and I hate them