Hogwarts Too Exposed Chapter 1 part 1
The Hogwarts Exposed series consists of four fics (well, three and a half) which follow the same one story per year format as Harry Potter itself. This was quite a popular format for longfic in the three-year summer: the Draco Trilogy and Psychic Serpent also did it, for instance. Too Exposed begins where Exposed left off. "Left off" being the key phrase, because the conclusion was so rushed it might as well not have been there. Harry and Hermione are on their way to Cap d'Agde, still firmly clutching the idiot ball.
It resembled any other minivan as it sped along the highway, definitely not the slightest bit magical in appearance.
It resembled one of the author's sentences.
There was absolutely no reason for anyone to imagine that the two passengers seated in the front were the most powerful witch and wizard in the world.
Especially as they hadn't shown any evidence of this in Hogwarts Exposed.
The wizard at the age of twenty-four, was enjoying the first vacation ever of his life.
From his expression, Hermione could tell that her comment had hurt Harry’s feelings.
I think there's a line missing here. I've heard of in medias res, but this is ridiculous.
“Actually some of the rides were pretty lame,” Emily interjected. “The Peter Pan carts that were suppose to look like little ships didn’t really fly, they were attached to the ceiling. Also, I can’t believe they had the nerve to call that one ride Aladdin’s Flying Carpets. They weren’t carpets and they most certainly weren’t flying.”
Disneyland clearly isn't good enough for this insufferable fucking brat who asked to go there. You know, I'd been warned that she gets worse as the series goes on. I wasn't expecting it so early in the first chapter.
“Emily,” Jamie said, the irritation evident in her voice.
When even another Sue can't stand you, it's time to worry.
“Okay,” admitted Harry. “I agree that they were way off base with some things, but I thought the ghosts looked comparatively realistic in the Phantom Manor, and the Big Thunder Mountain ride was pleasurable.”
I say, it was bally well spiffing! What ho, old chap!
“Oh, yes,” exclaimed Jamie. “That roller coaster was awesome. So was Space Mountain-Earth to the Moon.”
Okay, that's one of the very few things you'll find me (ugh) agreeing with her on. Space Mountain is, indeed, awesome.
Hermione laughed. “My kind of broom. One with a padded seat and safety harness.”
“Are you sure you’re a genuine witch, Aunt Hermione?” Emily jokingly asked.
A question the readers were asking throughout Hogwarts Exposed.
“Didn’t Jamie tell you?” Hermione responded. “Harry and I thought it would be more comfy if you girls had your own room.”
Emily gave Jamie the evil eye and said, “Would it be okay if just Caitlin and I shared the room? Couldn’t Miss ‘snores-a-lot’ sleep with you guys?”
Hermione laughed as Jamie good-humoredly pretended to strangle Emily. “No, Harry and I might want a little time alone, Jamie’s snoring isn’t that ghastly.”
All hail the epic dramatic conflict!
Caitlin whispered to Emily, “Sounds like Mum and Dad are planning on shagging.”
Emily giggled before saying, “So what else is new.”
Um, this is not okay behaviour.
“Jamie,” Caitlin whispered. “Are you going to enlighten them or just let them be surprised?”
Jamie answered quietly, “I’m frightened to tell them. This seemed like such a first-rate idea at the time, but now I’m not so positive. They could both become rather angry when they find out.”
“Why?” Asked Emily. “It was their suggestion to let us choose the location. You even asked if there were any restrictions and they mutually said no; that they would go anywhere we wanted.”
These characters are respectively eleven, fifteen and ten. You'd be forgiven for not realising this because, well, just look at the dialogue.
“I know, but it’s just that I’m positive they aren’t expecting a resort town with forty thousand nudists. If Harry is on schedule we should arrive in about fifteen minutes.” Jamie looked nervously from Emily to Caitlin. “We better explain the situation to them before it’s too late.”
To be more fair than this terrible trio deserve, Harry and Hermione did give them free rein to choose their destination. And didn't do any research about it after they found out where it was, despite the fact that this would be the absolute first instinct of an in-character Hermione, and didn't realise that three nudists might want to go to a nudist resort. Quite frankly they've only got themselves to blame.
“Mum, Dad, there is something I need to tell you both,” Caitlin announced, her voice shaking.
“What is it, honey?” Harry and Hermione both said practically simultaneously.
HE!Harry and HE!Hermione are of a single mind. Probably because they've only got the one braincell between them.
“When Jamie first told me about Cap d’Adge, I knew it was somewhere I wanted to vacation, but doubted I would see it till after I left Hogwarts. Then you both decided to permit us to select our vacation destination. There was no squabble among us; Cap d’Adge was the primary choice for all three of us.” Caitlin paused momentarily to gather the strength to drop the bombshell.
She needed to get her breath back.
“I’m glad you’re pleased with our destination. Harry and I wanted this to be a unique family vacation for the five of us.” Hermione said.
I think she's going to get her wish.
“I too am looking forward to a tranquil week of swimming, sunning and reading.”
This should not be the first evidence we get of Hermione liking books.
Caitlin took a deep gulp of air, “Dad, as you enter the city of Cap d’Adge, watch for the road signs directing you to the “Naturisme” quarter. That’s where we are staying; it’s the nudist section of town.
When Harry’s brain absorbed what Caitlin had just said, his body almost lost control of the car.
So, four hours later?
He sputtered, but was unable to articulate intelligibly.
No change there then.
Hermione had no difficulty speaking as she shouted.
She spoke as she shouted? Does she have two mouths or something?
“What?! I thought we were going to a resort with beaches, restaurants and a shopping mall, not a nudist campground! Whatever possessed you girls to do such a thing?”
... you mediocre dunces!
Hermione sat nervously twitching her head as Harry reduced speed, awaiting more information.
The driver behind them blew his horn and swore loudly in French.
Caitlin was about to carry on, but Jamie placed her hand on the young girl’s shoulder and indicated that she would make an effort to clarify. “Cap d’Adge is not a nudist campsite. It is a nudist community. At this time of year we can doubtless expect over 40,000 people in the naturist quarter. L’ Hotel Eve, where we are staying, is the only hotel in the quarter, but there are an abundance of condominiums.
“No one will compel anyone to go nude although the beach is 99% nudist and you must be naked to swim in the pools. You will be amazed at the wonderful mix of ages from babes-in-arms to the very old. There is a shopping mall as well as many shops. There is a grocery store and many fine restaurants and lots of bars and clubs. You are free to wear as much or as little clothing as you want. Some people dress to go to dinner or shopping, my family always took their clothes off upon arrival and never put them back on until it was time to depart.”
Has Jamie swallowed the Cap d'Agde brochure or something?
“Hermione and I did say anywhere and I remember Jamie inquiring if there were any restrictions,” Harry acknowledged. “But don’t you believe it would have been nice to clue us in on the fact that this was a naturist resort? Just in case we had any uncertainties, which we most certainly do.”
Because, as I said, neither he nor Hermione made any effort to actually find out about this place that they're spending goodness knows how much money to stay at.
“Harry, would it be feasible for us to get a refund and try to get accommodations at another resort?” Hermione’s voice seemed calm, concealing the panic she felt inside. Her stomach was doing flip-flops at the notion of being in a jam-packed place with the biggest part of the populace nude.
Her voice can't seem calm if we're in her POV and she's anything but calm.
Hermione raised her voice somewhat. “Are you suggesting that we in fact stay at a nudist resort?”
Uh, yes?
Harry answered in his most consoling voice. “Mione, we may not have an option.
"I have to keep calling you that or the world will end!"
Hermione pressed her fingers to her temple trying to defend against the headache that she felt rapidly approaching.
I know how she feels.
“Okay, we’ll stay, but I want absolutely no argument from anyone if I opt to spend most of the time in my room reading.”
“But Mum,” Caitlin begged, “it’s a family vacation. I want to spend it with you. Can’t you at least read in the vicinity of the pool?”
Hermione turned to make a negative comment to Caitlin, but stopped when she saw tears in the young girl’s eyes. Her eyes, also, straight away watered.
Because Hermione is such a pushover.
As they entered the city of Cap d’Adge, Emily right away saw a sign indicating the directions to the “Naturisme” quarter. Harry followed the signs through a few roundabouts until they came to the entrance.
The description is so evocative I could actually believe I was in Cap d'Agde. Oh, wait, no it isn't.
After registering for a gate card they drove toward the parking lot for the L’Hotel Eve.
The the Hotel Eve?
Just prior to them reaching the parking lot, it happened.
Voldemort came back from the dead. "Avada Kedavra!" he shouted. The End.
Hermione saw her first nude people and, of course, it had to be two men. They were merely standing by a vending machine enjoying a beverage. Hermione yelled, “Caitlin, get down!”
So first she's like "oh no, naked men!", then she's like "ah, no worries, they're just having a drink" and then she goes into panic mode. That really doesn't make sense.
Caitlin, on the other hand, wanted no part of hiding. She had never seen a man naked and was not about to let pass her first opportunity. She forgot that staring is considered ill mannered, as her eyes remained glued on the two men.
How do I used tense again?
As Harry guided the van into a parking spot, Hermione lastly uncovered her eyes and looked about. It was evident that it was check in time as she noted at least three cars quite near them unloading. All three contained families. The adults were still fully clad, but evidently the children couldn’t wait because they were all either nude by now or in the course of undressing right there on the parking lot.
Caitlin found herself both checking out the girls and the boys, especially one boy who was about twelve. She whispered in Jamie’s ear, “Is that what Matt looks like?”
Jamie smiled. “Now, how would I know?
Yes, how would she know? "Hey, Jamie, have you been perving on the first year boys?" Not that I'd put it past anyone in this fic.
“May we disrobe, too?” Emily promptly asked.
Hermione was still bewildered, but Harry responded. “I’m astonished you waited this long.”
So am I.
“Harry, the majority of these people seem to have very little luggage compared to us?” Hermione observed.
Yes, I wonder why people don't take much in the way of luggage to a nudist resort.
Caitlin beamed. “You mean we can even go to the restaurants and mall nude if we want?”
“Clothing is not obligatory any place with the exception of the pools, there you must be nude,” Jamie replied.
Yes, I think we've established that the famous nudist resort is in fact a nudist resort.
Harry nodded in concurrence, but as he did, he couldn’t help but observe that all three of the men unloading cars were overweight, one actually rather corpulent. He wondered to himself if these men actually went nude or if they were just here for their families. Then he observed the women. It was evident that this was not a resort for only people with faultless bodies.
This is one of the few times that characters who aren't conventionally attractive will be acknowledged as anything other than antagonists in this fic.
As they started unloading the minivan, the young boy walked over to them and addressed Jamie. “You’re Jamie Zacherley, aren’t you?”
Jamie nodded her head at the boy who was obviously somewhat taken by her. “Yes I am. I’m sorry, but did we meet last year?”
“No, we didn’t, but I saw you in the Miss Nude Teen contest.” The boy blushed. “My name is Daniel, Daniel Weber. I thought you were pretty last year, but you’re gorgeous this year. Is that why you came this particular week? Are you taking part in the competition for a second time?”
Jamie blushed at being referred to as gorgeous, even if the admirer was merely twelve. “I had no idea the contest was this week, but I won’t be participating this year, I’ll be one of the spectators.”
He remembers her a year on, even though as (evidently) a nudist he sees naked girls all the time. Obvious Sue is obvious.
As he turned and walked away, together Caitlin and Emily stared at his butt. Jamie just watched them both and smiled.
Caitlin I can understand, never having seen a boy's bare arse before, but Emily? These girls are either lifelong nudists accustomed to other people's nakedness or they're not. Make your mind up.
“If we all grab as much as we can carry, I think we can make this in one trip,” Harry recommended. The girls led the way as they walked toward the main entrance of the hotel.
Harry commented to Hermione, “It’s amazing how natural this is to them, even Caitlin. They don’t think twice about the reality that they are naked.”
“No, they don’t,” Hermione, said. “They’re naked and I’m the one trembling like a leaf. I don’t know about you Harry, but there is absolutely no way that I am going to march around naked in front of a horde of strangers. I take pleasure in doing it with the girls and when we’re alone
I'm not going to touch that.
but I’m not about to be stared at by strangers.”
They're nudists. They don't care if you're naked. They're not going to pay you any more attention than anyone else.
As they entered the reception area, Hermione almost dropped the luggage she was carrying as she literally entered the nudist world.
Literally.
Not only were there couples in the lobby, totally nude, but also the young girl at the reception counter was likewise completely naked. Hermione, marveled as Jamie easily conversed in French with the girl;
Being able to speak enough French to check into a hotel is not only not an uncommon skill (Wikipedia says 23% of the UK population have at least basic French, and this is generally one of the first things people learn) but I'd be surprised if Hermione herself couldn't. Now she could be marvelling at how Jamie seems unperturbed by everyone being naked, but she's a lifelong nudist. Of course she is.
meanwhile Harry stood by trying not to gawk, but not succeeding well at all.
On the one hand, yes, someone attending a nudist resort for the first time probably would have trouble keeping their roving eye in check. On the other, the author is projecting so hard he's in danger of dazzling passing spacecraft.
Soon armed with their keys and copious brochures they were on the way to their rooms.
Of course, they don't need the brochures because Jamie has memorised the lot.
Hermione tried valiantly to smile and retain eye contact with the other guests they passed in route. She was exceedingly pleased when at last the door closed behind her and the nudist world was shut out. Hermione plopped the bags she was carrying down and waited for Harry to return from settling in the girls. She desperately needed a hug.
Sorry, fellow Hermione fans. We'll have to put up with this clingy, codependent impostor for the next two and a half fics. D:
Emily suddenly burst into the room. “May we possibly go down to the pool?”
“I don’t see why not,” Harry responded. I’d like to take a stroll and decide where we are eating tonight, so please be back around six.”
“Aren’t the two of you coming?” Emily asked.
Harry glanced at Hermione who nervously shook her head no.
At which I facepalmed in frustration and said "I hate this fic" in a mood of hating this fic.
The girls both slipped out of their sneakers and socks and ran to the shower, giggling.
Harry looked at Hermione with a concerned expression on his face. “Are they going to shower together?”
“In all probability, yes, but they do it a lot,” Hermione answered.
“Doesn’t that worry you?” Harry asked. The nature of his voice indicated that it did him. “If two boys showered together at that age, I would be concerned they were gay. Aren’t you concerned about Caitlin and Emily?”
I don't know whether knowing exactly what this is foreshadowing makes it worse.
“No, I’m not. Harry, a girl doesn’t wake up one morning and decide she wants to become a lesbian. Its part of a person’s makeup from birth. You are either homosexual or heterosexual just like you’re either right handed or left handed.
Bisexual and asexual people don't exist, apparently.
You can’t modify what you are. From everything I’ve observed, they are both quite heterosexual,
We have to take her word for this because the author doesn't know when to show rather than tell.
but they are also very close and very silly and extremely inquisitive.”
Because who needs characterisation when we have expospeak?
Continued...
It resembled any other minivan as it sped along the highway, definitely not the slightest bit magical in appearance.
It resembled one of the author's sentences.
There was absolutely no reason for anyone to imagine that the two passengers seated in the front were the most powerful witch and wizard in the world.
Especially as they hadn't shown any evidence of this in Hogwarts Exposed.
The wizard at the age of twenty-four, was enjoying the first vacation ever of his life.
From his expression, Hermione could tell that her comment had hurt Harry’s feelings.
I think there's a line missing here. I've heard of in medias res, but this is ridiculous.
“Actually some of the rides were pretty lame,” Emily interjected. “The Peter Pan carts that were suppose to look like little ships didn’t really fly, they were attached to the ceiling. Also, I can’t believe they had the nerve to call that one ride Aladdin’s Flying Carpets. They weren’t carpets and they most certainly weren’t flying.”
Disneyland clearly isn't good enough for this insufferable fucking brat who asked to go there. You know, I'd been warned that she gets worse as the series goes on. I wasn't expecting it so early in the first chapter.
“Emily,” Jamie said, the irritation evident in her voice.
When even another Sue can't stand you, it's time to worry.
“Okay,” admitted Harry. “I agree that they were way off base with some things, but I thought the ghosts looked comparatively realistic in the Phantom Manor, and the Big Thunder Mountain ride was pleasurable.”
I say, it was bally well spiffing! What ho, old chap!
“Oh, yes,” exclaimed Jamie. “That roller coaster was awesome. So was Space Mountain-Earth to the Moon.”
Okay, that's one of the very few things you'll find me (ugh) agreeing with her on. Space Mountain is, indeed, awesome.
Hermione laughed. “My kind of broom. One with a padded seat and safety harness.”
“Are you sure you’re a genuine witch, Aunt Hermione?” Emily jokingly asked.
A question the readers were asking throughout Hogwarts Exposed.
“Didn’t Jamie tell you?” Hermione responded. “Harry and I thought it would be more comfy if you girls had your own room.”
Emily gave Jamie the evil eye and said, “Would it be okay if just Caitlin and I shared the room? Couldn’t Miss ‘snores-a-lot’ sleep with you guys?”
Hermione laughed as Jamie good-humoredly pretended to strangle Emily. “No, Harry and I might want a little time alone, Jamie’s snoring isn’t that ghastly.”
All hail the epic dramatic conflict!
Caitlin whispered to Emily, “Sounds like Mum and Dad are planning on shagging.”
Emily giggled before saying, “So what else is new.”
Um, this is not okay behaviour.
“Jamie,” Caitlin whispered. “Are you going to enlighten them or just let them be surprised?”
Jamie answered quietly, “I’m frightened to tell them. This seemed like such a first-rate idea at the time, but now I’m not so positive. They could both become rather angry when they find out.”
“Why?” Asked Emily. “It was their suggestion to let us choose the location. You even asked if there were any restrictions and they mutually said no; that they would go anywhere we wanted.”
These characters are respectively eleven, fifteen and ten. You'd be forgiven for not realising this because, well, just look at the dialogue.
“I know, but it’s just that I’m positive they aren’t expecting a resort town with forty thousand nudists. If Harry is on schedule we should arrive in about fifteen minutes.” Jamie looked nervously from Emily to Caitlin. “We better explain the situation to them before it’s too late.”
To be more fair than this terrible trio deserve, Harry and Hermione did give them free rein to choose their destination. And didn't do any research about it after they found out where it was, despite the fact that this would be the absolute first instinct of an in-character Hermione, and didn't realise that three nudists might want to go to a nudist resort. Quite frankly they've only got themselves to blame.
“Mum, Dad, there is something I need to tell you both,” Caitlin announced, her voice shaking.
“What is it, honey?” Harry and Hermione both said practically simultaneously.
HE!Harry and HE!Hermione are of a single mind. Probably because they've only got the one braincell between them.
“When Jamie first told me about Cap d’Adge, I knew it was somewhere I wanted to vacation, but doubted I would see it till after I left Hogwarts. Then you both decided to permit us to select our vacation destination. There was no squabble among us; Cap d’Adge was the primary choice for all three of us.” Caitlin paused momentarily to gather the strength to drop the bombshell.
She needed to get her breath back.
“I’m glad you’re pleased with our destination. Harry and I wanted this to be a unique family vacation for the five of us.” Hermione said.
I think she's going to get her wish.
“I too am looking forward to a tranquil week of swimming, sunning and reading.”
This should not be the first evidence we get of Hermione liking books.
Caitlin took a deep gulp of air, “Dad, as you enter the city of Cap d’Adge, watch for the road signs directing you to the “Naturisme” quarter. That’s where we are staying; it’s the nudist section of town.
When Harry’s brain absorbed what Caitlin had just said, his body almost lost control of the car.
So, four hours later?
He sputtered, but was unable to articulate intelligibly.
No change there then.
Hermione had no difficulty speaking as she shouted.
She spoke as she shouted? Does she have two mouths or something?
“What?! I thought we were going to a resort with beaches, restaurants and a shopping mall, not a nudist campground! Whatever possessed you girls to do such a thing?”
... you mediocre dunces!
Hermione sat nervously twitching her head as Harry reduced speed, awaiting more information.
The driver behind them blew his horn and swore loudly in French.
Caitlin was about to carry on, but Jamie placed her hand on the young girl’s shoulder and indicated that she would make an effort to clarify. “Cap d’Adge is not a nudist campsite. It is a nudist community. At this time of year we can doubtless expect over 40,000 people in the naturist quarter. L’ Hotel Eve, where we are staying, is the only hotel in the quarter, but there are an abundance of condominiums.
“No one will compel anyone to go nude although the beach is 99% nudist and you must be naked to swim in the pools. You will be amazed at the wonderful mix of ages from babes-in-arms to the very old. There is a shopping mall as well as many shops. There is a grocery store and many fine restaurants and lots of bars and clubs. You are free to wear as much or as little clothing as you want. Some people dress to go to dinner or shopping, my family always took their clothes off upon arrival and never put them back on until it was time to depart.”
Has Jamie swallowed the Cap d'Agde brochure or something?
“Hermione and I did say anywhere and I remember Jamie inquiring if there were any restrictions,” Harry acknowledged. “But don’t you believe it would have been nice to clue us in on the fact that this was a naturist resort? Just in case we had any uncertainties, which we most certainly do.”
Because, as I said, neither he nor Hermione made any effort to actually find out about this place that they're spending goodness knows how much money to stay at.
“Harry, would it be feasible for us to get a refund and try to get accommodations at another resort?” Hermione’s voice seemed calm, concealing the panic she felt inside. Her stomach was doing flip-flops at the notion of being in a jam-packed place with the biggest part of the populace nude.
Her voice can't seem calm if we're in her POV and she's anything but calm.
Hermione raised her voice somewhat. “Are you suggesting that we in fact stay at a nudist resort?”
Uh, yes?
Harry answered in his most consoling voice. “Mione, we may not have an option.
"I have to keep calling you that or the world will end!"
Hermione pressed her fingers to her temple trying to defend against the headache that she felt rapidly approaching.
I know how she feels.
“Okay, we’ll stay, but I want absolutely no argument from anyone if I opt to spend most of the time in my room reading.”
“But Mum,” Caitlin begged, “it’s a family vacation. I want to spend it with you. Can’t you at least read in the vicinity of the pool?”
Hermione turned to make a negative comment to Caitlin, but stopped when she saw tears in the young girl’s eyes. Her eyes, also, straight away watered.
Because Hermione is such a pushover.
As they entered the city of Cap d’Adge, Emily right away saw a sign indicating the directions to the “Naturisme” quarter. Harry followed the signs through a few roundabouts until they came to the entrance.
The description is so evocative I could actually believe I was in Cap d'Agde. Oh, wait, no it isn't.
After registering for a gate card they drove toward the parking lot for the L’Hotel Eve.
The the Hotel Eve?
Just prior to them reaching the parking lot, it happened.
Voldemort came back from the dead. "Avada Kedavra!" he shouted. The End.
Hermione saw her first nude people and, of course, it had to be two men. They were merely standing by a vending machine enjoying a beverage. Hermione yelled, “Caitlin, get down!”
So first she's like "oh no, naked men!", then she's like "ah, no worries, they're just having a drink" and then she goes into panic mode. That really doesn't make sense.
Caitlin, on the other hand, wanted no part of hiding. She had never seen a man naked and was not about to let pass her first opportunity. She forgot that staring is considered ill mannered, as her eyes remained glued on the two men.
How do I used tense again?
As Harry guided the van into a parking spot, Hermione lastly uncovered her eyes and looked about. It was evident that it was check in time as she noted at least three cars quite near them unloading. All three contained families. The adults were still fully clad, but evidently the children couldn’t wait because they were all either nude by now or in the course of undressing right there on the parking lot.
Caitlin found herself both checking out the girls and the boys, especially one boy who was about twelve. She whispered in Jamie’s ear, “Is that what Matt looks like?”
Jamie smiled. “Now, how would I know?
Yes, how would she know? "Hey, Jamie, have you been perving on the first year boys?" Not that I'd put it past anyone in this fic.
“May we disrobe, too?” Emily promptly asked.
Hermione was still bewildered, but Harry responded. “I’m astonished you waited this long.”
So am I.
“Harry, the majority of these people seem to have very little luggage compared to us?” Hermione observed.
Yes, I wonder why people don't take much in the way of luggage to a nudist resort.
Caitlin beamed. “You mean we can even go to the restaurants and mall nude if we want?”
“Clothing is not obligatory any place with the exception of the pools, there you must be nude,” Jamie replied.
Yes, I think we've established that the famous nudist resort is in fact a nudist resort.
Harry nodded in concurrence, but as he did, he couldn’t help but observe that all three of the men unloading cars were overweight, one actually rather corpulent. He wondered to himself if these men actually went nude or if they were just here for their families. Then he observed the women. It was evident that this was not a resort for only people with faultless bodies.
This is one of the few times that characters who aren't conventionally attractive will be acknowledged as anything other than antagonists in this fic.
As they started unloading the minivan, the young boy walked over to them and addressed Jamie. “You’re Jamie Zacherley, aren’t you?”
Jamie nodded her head at the boy who was obviously somewhat taken by her. “Yes I am. I’m sorry, but did we meet last year?”
“No, we didn’t, but I saw you in the Miss Nude Teen contest.” The boy blushed. “My name is Daniel, Daniel Weber. I thought you were pretty last year, but you’re gorgeous this year. Is that why you came this particular week? Are you taking part in the competition for a second time?”
Jamie blushed at being referred to as gorgeous, even if the admirer was merely twelve. “I had no idea the contest was this week, but I won’t be participating this year, I’ll be one of the spectators.”
He remembers her a year on, even though as (evidently) a nudist he sees naked girls all the time. Obvious Sue is obvious.
As he turned and walked away, together Caitlin and Emily stared at his butt. Jamie just watched them both and smiled.
Caitlin I can understand, never having seen a boy's bare arse before, but Emily? These girls are either lifelong nudists accustomed to other people's nakedness or they're not. Make your mind up.
“If we all grab as much as we can carry, I think we can make this in one trip,” Harry recommended. The girls led the way as they walked toward the main entrance of the hotel.
Harry commented to Hermione, “It’s amazing how natural this is to them, even Caitlin. They don’t think twice about the reality that they are naked.”
“No, they don’t,” Hermione, said. “They’re naked and I’m the one trembling like a leaf. I don’t know about you Harry, but there is absolutely no way that I am going to march around naked in front of a horde of strangers. I take pleasure in doing it with the girls and when we’re alone
I'm not going to touch that.
but I’m not about to be stared at by strangers.”
They're nudists. They don't care if you're naked. They're not going to pay you any more attention than anyone else.
As they entered the reception area, Hermione almost dropped the luggage she was carrying as she literally entered the nudist world.
Literally.
Not only were there couples in the lobby, totally nude, but also the young girl at the reception counter was likewise completely naked. Hermione, marveled as Jamie easily conversed in French with the girl;
Being able to speak enough French to check into a hotel is not only not an uncommon skill (Wikipedia says 23% of the UK population have at least basic French, and this is generally one of the first things people learn) but I'd be surprised if Hermione herself couldn't. Now she could be marvelling at how Jamie seems unperturbed by everyone being naked, but she's a lifelong nudist. Of course she is.
meanwhile Harry stood by trying not to gawk, but not succeeding well at all.
On the one hand, yes, someone attending a nudist resort for the first time probably would have trouble keeping their roving eye in check. On the other, the author is projecting so hard he's in danger of dazzling passing spacecraft.
Soon armed with their keys and copious brochures they were on the way to their rooms.
Of course, they don't need the brochures because Jamie has memorised the lot.
Hermione tried valiantly to smile and retain eye contact with the other guests they passed in route. She was exceedingly pleased when at last the door closed behind her and the nudist world was shut out. Hermione plopped the bags she was carrying down and waited for Harry to return from settling in the girls. She desperately needed a hug.
Sorry, fellow Hermione fans. We'll have to put up with this clingy, codependent impostor for the next two and a half fics. D:
Emily suddenly burst into the room. “May we possibly go down to the pool?”
“I don’t see why not,” Harry responded. I’d like to take a stroll and decide where we are eating tonight, so please be back around six.”
“Aren’t the two of you coming?” Emily asked.
Harry glanced at Hermione who nervously shook her head no.
At which I facepalmed in frustration and said "I hate this fic" in a mood of hating this fic.
The girls both slipped out of their sneakers and socks and ran to the shower, giggling.
Harry looked at Hermione with a concerned expression on his face. “Are they going to shower together?”
“In all probability, yes, but they do it a lot,” Hermione answered.
“Doesn’t that worry you?” Harry asked. The nature of his voice indicated that it did him. “If two boys showered together at that age, I would be concerned they were gay. Aren’t you concerned about Caitlin and Emily?”
I don't know whether knowing exactly what this is foreshadowing makes it worse.
“No, I’m not. Harry, a girl doesn’t wake up one morning and decide she wants to become a lesbian. Its part of a person’s makeup from birth. You are either homosexual or heterosexual just like you’re either right handed or left handed.
Bisexual and asexual people don't exist, apparently.
You can’t modify what you are. From everything I’ve observed, they are both quite heterosexual,
We have to take her word for this because the author doesn't know when to show rather than tell.
but they are also very close and very silly and extremely inquisitive.”
Because who needs characterisation when we have expospeak?
Continued...