talk of neverending things
Hello 2009, still trying to figure out if you came in with a bang or with a whimper.
I read through my previous posts of this year a moment ago, what little there are of them. In many ways this was a lost year for me. It started on the lowest point I have experienced almost ever. Last December I was coming to terms with the news that I had failed out of the Pre-Vet Scholars program. Now a year has gone by and I'm right on the cusp of knowing whether or not I've gotten into vet school and the future is still so very uncertain. I'm not even sure what I want anymore. A year ago a certain someone told me he loved me for the first time in our five-year relationship. Since then I have gone through both hell and heaven with him. He came to visit me over spring break and we spent a long summer together and then he broke my heart all over again and I very nearly didn't make it through that pain. I'm still piecing bits of myself back together. But as always, it didn't last, it never does. And now I would go through all the pain all over again just to hear him say I love you on the phone.
A year of academic competition and moving off campus. A year with new kittens and the first presidential race I could vote in. A year where I saw Barack Obama give a speech on my campus not 20 feet from where I stood. I've survived the nudist roommate with her mice and the manic-depressive roommate who turns on me when he gets down. This year I have seen relationships I thought would last a long time break apart and people whose strength I believed in break down. I went to a wedding. I saw Spamalot and played fallout 3. I reconnected with some old friends and I went on a date with nobility. This year has contained the highest and the lowest gas prices I've ever seen in my life. The Olympics went by with little fanfare. Anime club membership doubled.
My heart broke and was mended and now I feel simultaneously terrified about the future and confident that I can deal with whatever ends up happening. Here's to a bright and promising new year.
Once again I close my new years post with a quote from the estimable Neil Gaiman.
"...I hope you will have a wonderful year, that you'll dream dangerously and outrageously, that you'll make something that didn't exist before you made it, that you will be loved and that you will be liked, and that you will have people to love and to like in return. And, most importantly (because I think there should be more kindness and more wisdom in the world right now), that you will, when you need to be, be wise, and that you will always be kind."
I read through my previous posts of this year a moment ago, what little there are of them. In many ways this was a lost year for me. It started on the lowest point I have experienced almost ever. Last December I was coming to terms with the news that I had failed out of the Pre-Vet Scholars program. Now a year has gone by and I'm right on the cusp of knowing whether or not I've gotten into vet school and the future is still so very uncertain. I'm not even sure what I want anymore. A year ago a certain someone told me he loved me for the first time in our five-year relationship. Since then I have gone through both hell and heaven with him. He came to visit me over spring break and we spent a long summer together and then he broke my heart all over again and I very nearly didn't make it through that pain. I'm still piecing bits of myself back together. But as always, it didn't last, it never does. And now I would go through all the pain all over again just to hear him say I love you on the phone.
A year of academic competition and moving off campus. A year with new kittens and the first presidential race I could vote in. A year where I saw Barack Obama give a speech on my campus not 20 feet from where I stood. I've survived the nudist roommate with her mice and the manic-depressive roommate who turns on me when he gets down. This year I have seen relationships I thought would last a long time break apart and people whose strength I believed in break down. I went to a wedding. I saw Spamalot and played fallout 3. I reconnected with some old friends and I went on a date with nobility. This year has contained the highest and the lowest gas prices I've ever seen in my life. The Olympics went by with little fanfare. Anime club membership doubled.
My heart broke and was mended and now I feel simultaneously terrified about the future and confident that I can deal with whatever ends up happening. Here's to a bright and promising new year.
Once again I close my new years post with a quote from the estimable Neil Gaiman.
"...I hope you will have a wonderful year, that you'll dream dangerously and outrageously, that you'll make something that didn't exist before you made it, that you will be loved and that you will be liked, and that you will have people to love and to like in return. And, most importantly (because I think there should be more kindness and more wisdom in the world right now), that you will, when you need to be, be wise, and that you will always be kind."