108 Your love amazes me

[sylnl]

Word Soap: As The World Keeps Turning
Author: SYLnl
Title:  #108 Your love amazes me
Rating: PG
Summary:  You give me hope, you give me reason - Amanda Hunt & Chuck Jones
Big Thanks To: ltklo, for brushing up my grammar

Previously on As The World Keeps Turning: click here for chapters 1 - 107 

“Okay Will, you probably know the questions by now…” Katie smiled, “but tell us… where were you this time last year?”

“Home. In Carbondale,” Will glanced at Gwen, “enjoying our little family and missing some extended family members.” He looked at Luke and both friends grinned in understanding. “We both had some weeks off from school, so it was great to spend so much time together.”

Katie nodded.

“What new insight in 2010 made the most impression?”

“Yeah, I’ve been thinking about that one…and I’m not sure it was a new insight, but when we came back to Oakdale, I realized how we had grown as a family unit. The girls and me, I mean. Because it was all drama again, of course, and life pushed us around a little, but we didn’t get sidetracked. And that made us decide to move back here. We now know we can handle any crisis that comes our way. And in my family that’s almost a daily assurance.”

Everybody chuckled. Even without knowing the details, it was pretty obvious that a mixture with Barbara, Henry, Paul and Emily would rouse the emotions.

“Sounds like an important insight,” Katie smiled again. “When did you feel most proud of yourself this past year and why?”

“Very recently, actually. I allowed myself to change my mind on a very important matter and I felt very proud about that. Not just about changing my mind, but also very proud to be involved in Luke’s foundation like this.”

Again he looked at Luke and the blond nodded. I’m very proud of you too.

“That sounds great!” Katie sat up a little, “So I’m guessing the next question isn’t hard to answer either…When did you feel most grateful this past year and why?”

“Yeah, I did feel very grateful when Luke offered me this job, but I had some other major events this year. My mother had been missing for quite some time and I was very grateful we found her alive. And then she had her accident and lost her memory. And I was very grateful when she recovered from that. But the most grateful… that has to be about my girls. Their love… it still amazes me, every day.”

At that very exact second the background music became suddenly very prominent and everybody present felt the spine-chilling effect of this song playing at this moment… They all listened quietly to John Berry’s ‘Your love amazes me’  and after the last note, they let this synchronism sink in for a moment.

“I love that song, but I will never be able to hear it without thinking of this moment…this was…weird…” Luke put into words and the nods around him underlined he wasn’t the only one feeling like that.

“Maybe it was a sign of Brad,” Katie whispered.

“Or my father,” Will refuted.

“Or my mother,” Bob joined in.

“Or Annie,” Luke looked at Reid.

“Or it was just a coincidence,” Reid raised his eyebrow. “We’ll never know.”

“True, but that doesn’t make it less special,” Katie countered. After Reid’s smile, she turned to Will again.

“What question do you want answered in 2011?”

Will pointed at the stereo. “What was that? I’d like an answer to that, although I agree with Reid. We’ll probably never know. Other than that… oh wait… I’m anxious to find out what kind of boss Luke is…”

His grin was teasing and Reid rolled his eyes. “A slave driver, that’s what he is.”

“That’s the only way to handle you,” Bob teased and Reid faked indignation, while Luke nodded in agreement.

“You see, Dr. Bob understands.”

“Go live with him then,” Reid sneered and glanced at his watch, “you still have ninety minutes left to give the new year a great start…”

“Ah…” Luke pushed Reid with his head, “as if my life could be great if you’re not there…”

Reid gave him a quick smile. “That’s more like it,” he mumbled, before leaning in for a kiss.

“His ego is very fragile,” Luke explained as seriously looking as possible, but if the burst of laughter was any indication, he hadn’t fooled anybody.

Reid just sat there, on the armrest of the couch, watching his guests and shaking his head.

“So this is friendship. No wonder I chose to avoid that.”

His remark was welcomed by a new wave of laughter and he took a large draught of his beer. The amusement in his eyes was apparent. Dr. Reid Oliver was enjoying himself.

“Okay Will,” Katie was still grinning, “last question. How do you hope to feel on December 31st 2011?”

“Absolutely like I feel now,” Will’s smile was telling. “I’m having a blast and I feel blessed. I hope all the love, all the humor, all the friendship will be there next year too.”

“I drink to that,” Katie lifted her almost empty wineglass and Chris chuckled, while joining the applause for Will.

“That’s not even a subtle hint,” he snorted and rose to his feet. “Would you like a refill, my lady?”

Katie smiled. “Well…that’s an offer I won’t refuse…”

Casey left the couch too and helped Chris with all the orders. Reid watched it with a small smile on his lips. He liked how everybody pitched in and had found their way to their kitchen. How nobody expected him or Luke to cater to their needs. So his thankful grin was genuine when Chris handed him another beer.

“You have some serious champagne in your fridge,” Chris looked impressed and Reid chuckled.

“You know me. Only the best will do.”

“Yeah. And it seems to work for you.”

“It works for everybody,” Reid shrugged. “You just need to be confident enough to claim it.”

“Or arrogant enough…” Chris smirked.

“If you think it’s arrogant to want the best, I can tell you’re not ready to be or receive the best yet.” Reid’s voice was calm and after some hesitation Chris nodded.

“Good point, Oliver. Hate to admit that, but good point.”

Reid followed Chris with his eyes and watched how he handed Katie her glass of wine and sat next to her with a contemplative look. Apparently he had hit a nerve and Reid couldn’t help but like that.

“Full of yourself much?” Luke whispered and Reid winked at his blond.

“Yep.”

“Good.”

Again their kiss was way to short, but the promise in their eyes was deep and long. Later.

“So Will…it’s up to you, now…” Bob encouraged him, “If we’re ready for another one, that is…”

“I think we’ll have time for one more, so make it count, Will” Luke said after checking his watch.

“In that case…we’ve started this Time Capsule with your significant other, so it feels only right to end the circle with you, Luke. Are you up for it?”

Luke nodded, although visibly not too enthusiastic and Will frowned for a moment. “You can say no…”

“I know, but I’m not backing out. But those questions have stirred up some old stuff…”

He felt Reid’s hand on his shoulder and his skin tingled. Like Reid’s energy was finding its way through Luke’s body. He smiled. It was old stuff. He could do this.

“…but anyway…where I was, a year ago. Well, I guess I was in limbo land. Noah had left for some clinic to help him with his blindness, but my grandmother had arranged a plane so Noah could be home for Christmas. Not to be with me, but because he missed the feel of Christmas on the Snyder Farmer.”

His voice sounded sad and Reid softly squeezed Luke’s shoulder, but didn’t say a word.

“So I wasn’t in a great place, one year ago. Let’s leave it at that.”

Will nodded. He knew Luke’s agony. Luke had written mail after mail about it.

“What new insight in 2010 made the most impression?”

“That I’m worthy of the best,” Luke looked up at Reid and they both smiled. “I let myself be treated like dirt, because I had convinced myself I was a charity case and should be grateful for every crumb of love that was thrown at me…”

Several disbelieving “What?”s filled the room.

“Please tell me you’re exaggerating,” Ali looked shocked and bit her lip when Luke and Reid simultaneously shook their heads.

“Noah did that?” she whispered.

“I did that,” Luke corrected her and smiled. “But then this guy came to town…” he leaned his head against Reid’s body, “and basically pointed out to me that it wasn’t okay for Noah to beat up on me like he did. It’s time somebody stuck up for you, Reid said…and I was overwhelmed by that. My first response was that I didn’t deserve someone sticking up for me and that made me realize how low I felt about myself.”

His young friends looked in horror by now. How could they have missed this? Luke had obviously been struggling and where had they been? And the newcomer, the sarcastic Dr. Satan they had all disliked, judged and dismissed, had seen their friend’s struggle and had thrown Luke a lifeline.

“I had no idea…” Ali still looked horrified, “Why did you never tell me? Or Case?”

“Because Noah was your friend too,” Luke shrugged. “It didn’t feel right…”

“Dude!” Casey looked angry, “Noah was my friend, because you loved him. That’s it. Don’t you ever do something like this again…I’m here for you.”

The two friends smiled at each other and Will took a deep breath.

“I’m glad you realize your self worth by now. When did you feel most proud of yourself last year and why?”

“When I finally chose love over fear,” Luke answered. “I was so scared of the level of emotions I felt for Reid, that I was willing to stay in my comfort zone and accept a toxic relationship. And even when Reid and I started…hanging out…I wasn’t really fully committed. Then one day I had this nightmare. Reid had been killed by a train and the thought of living my life without him…” Luke shook his head to wipe out the memory, “It was devastating…and very revealing too. That dream made me realize how much I love Reid. And the rest, as they say, is history.”

Luke and Reid smiled when everybody applauded.

“Does this mean I’m done?” Luke looked wicked and Will shook his head.

“Nope. When did you feel most grateful last year and why?”

“Grateful. Yeah, many, many times,” Luke smiled at the sleeping boy on his lap. “The first time this one said daddy to me, for instance. Or showed me he trusts me. But most grateful… when Reid put this ring on my finger…,” Luke looked at it, raising his hand, “…for the second time. I almost messed up, but when Reid put that ring back, I finally understood he really loves me.”

“That he does,” Will agreed, “So at least that’s a question you’ve got answered. What question do you want answered in 2011?”

“I honestly don’t know. I think I’ll borrow Reid’s question, because that’s a very important one in our family. If there’s a way to stop the horror, I hope we’ll find the answer next year. Oh…and if my mother is ever gonna see Reid for who he really is. I’d like to see that happen too.”

“Me too,” Will smiled, “and this last question…well, we can answer that one for you, I guess…”

Luke laughed. “Yeah, I hope I look as happy as I feel. Because I really am. I’m truly loved for who I am and that’s incredibly powerful. So I hope I’ll still feel this loved next year.”

“That calls for champagne,” Reid stated after the applause and they all clapped again, waking up both young kids.

“Is it new year yet?” Hallie yawned.

“Almost,” Gwen smiled, caressing the curls. “We’re almost there.”