wow
I've been home for a month and have done pretty much nothing except for play the waiting game. I'm not very good at the waiting game, in fact I'm down right terrible at it. I guess I'm just waiting to see if I have to get the money together to go to school for what I want or if I can get sponsored and actually have a trade with in the next couple of years. It would certainly be nice. Of course per usual I get NO support from dear old mom for the my perferred education choice. apparently I have no patience to cook. I would probably have patience to cook if she wouldn't hover over me and ever so quickly tell me what needs to be done to cook it her way. so nonetheless I refuse to cook in this house while dear old mom is around. I will wait until I have my own apartment with my own utensils etc etc. yeah I know it's childish, but it's just so much easier to keep my goal realistic without someone in my immediate family pissing all over it. that's pretty sad though if you ask me. just about everything I have in mind to do for myself is never good enough or there's always some better way it can be done in her mind, and honestly I'm just getting tired of hearing it, the only thing I really want is someone to listen to me. I don't want to hear if they don't agree with me, I just want them to sit there and listen. Of course that never happens, so it's just easier to say absolutely nothing at all. why the fuck did I end up living with the family who has more opinions about how people should be living their lives. of course it really sucks that I don't get that support that I envision but I am getting some so I really shouldn't be unhappy. take care my beautiful, beautiful nonresponive journal who does not judge me in any form or manner whatsoever.