.003 Ends
.003 Ends
Sydney Alexis
It was a small service--just her family and his. No more than thirty people. All of them standing on their beach at sunset.
Friday, 9:23 am
The wood was cold and smooth beneath his touch as he eased his hand along the grain.
"That's one of our more popular models," a voice said in the distance, but he couldn't be sure if it was directed at him. After that night everything was just a blur of sight and sound.
Breath labored in his chest, the sickly sweaty feeling returned to his skin an instant before everything turned a gray haze.
The chair he was ushered in to was plush and pink. Brocade with tiny flowers in it. She would have laughed at the corporate Barbie air this place had. Probably would have made some perverse joke about it.
A cold glass was placed in his hand, fingers gripping the sides of it on instinct. Suddenly, his father was kneeling in front of him, worried expression painted all over his features.
"When was the last time you ate, Sonny Boy?"
He blinked, slowly processing what should have been such a simple sentence.
"What day is it?"
Brian reached out and touched his knee.
"We can do this later. Come back after you've eaten...rested up some."
The ice in the glass clinked against the side, and Gus thought of her laying in the morgue, body wrapped in black plastic, chilled by the freezer. Icicles clinging to eyelashes.
"Blue eyes," he said, softly, looking up at his father with a haunted expression. "She had blue eyes."
The grip on his knee tightened ever so as Brian watched his son fall apart in front of him.
Gus covered his father's hand with his own, a sudden fear striking him. "Promise me you won't let me forget. I can't forget it. The color...it's important. Her eyes weren't like Abigail's or Pop's."
Nodding, Brian rocked back onto his heels. "I promise, Sonny Boy."
Gus looked off into the distance, eyes locking on the mahogany stained walls as he considered his father's promise. "Pops will remember; he always remembers little things like that."
Lips thin, Brian nodded once again. A long quiet fell on them as he watched his son. Eyes distant, face blank, Gus would just fucking stare into space as if lost in his own memories.
Then again, no one expects to lose their wife so soon into the marriage.
He couldn't help but think that Lindz would have handled all of this better, but she and Justin were taking care of Abby while they made arrangements. Gus had insisted he should go, and Brian had a sinking suspicion it was because his son realized his father was the only one that understood what it was like to be left utterly alone by the only person he'd ever loved.
Even if it was only for a few months...
"She didn't like to ride on elevators," Gus said, suddenly meeting his father's eyes. "She hated enclosed spaces; it's why she took that fucking bus to work rather than driving."
Again, Brian nodded; he'd known all this.
"I think she'd want to be cremated instead of buried in some little box," Gus said, looking up at the funeral director for the first time in an age.
"Of course, Sir. We can arrange that," the director...Greeson Something or Other said.
"And carnations. Elizabeth loved red carnations," he said, looking down at his hand. Half expecting to find her blood still there.
. . . . .
Wednesday, 11:45pm
The vending machines and light fixtures buzzed around him. Sterilizing chemicals burned his nose. It was all too bright, too loud, to overpowering despite the haze he was in.
Abigail stirred at the movement around them, small mouth working against the binky even in her sleep.
All around him, he felt nurses and staff hovering, waiting for him to break apart.
From his pocket, he drew his cell phone. Thumb brushing against dry blood...her blood on the keypad as he dialed.
The line on the other end rang enough times that the machine picked up.
"Dad," Gus sobbed into the line. "Daddy, it's Gus. If you're there, pick up..."
No sooner had he started the word 'up' than Justin's voice filled his receiver.
"Gus."
"It's Elizabeth...I'm at Allegheny. They have all these forms to release her body, and it's almost time for Abby's feeding and I don't know what to do..."
Justin was quiet for a long, long moment. "Your dad and I will be right there, okay, Gus? Just stay put."
. . . . .
Tuesday, 4pm
"Abigail, smile for the camera," Gus said, bouncing the little girl on her knee.
As she giggled at the movement, the photographer took the opportunity to flash a couple of frames.
The grip Elizabeth had on his forearm tightened just a fraction as she smiled brightly at Gus.
"I just can't believe I finally got you do sit down and take this picture! I've been after you for how long?"
Returning her smile, he leaned across the baby to kiss her, ignoring the flash bulb in the background.
. . . . .
Thursday, 12:06 am
"Gus? Gus?"
Blinking, he looked up to find his fathers hovering above him.
"It was supposed to be a quick trip," he said, brow wrinkling. "I should have been driving. It was icy out and night. She doesn't drive that often. But I was working on that fucking article all night and I was so tired...And there was so much blood. So much of it, and she wouldn't wake up."
Brian felt the air whoosh from his lungs; it was all too familiar.
"Gus," Justin started, slipping into the chair beside his son. "Gus, where is Elizabeth?"
Haunted, red-rimmed eyes locked on Justin's, and, before the words were spoken, he knew.
. . . . .
Sunday, 11:59 am
"Your Momma loved the beach," Gus said, holding Abigail against his chest. "We met there. Did she ever tell you about that? Me and Charlie went down to Georgia one summer to meet up with his dad. Ended up at this little hole in the wall bar right off the beach where your Momma was working as a bartender.
"She was so beautiful--bright, white blonde hair, steel blue eyes, and a cute little Kiwi accent. She had this dirty mouth that could brush guys off without even batting an eyelash. And I was stupid enough to fall in love with her on sight. Charlie thought I was nuts."
"I'd offer you a really lame come on, but something tells me you've heard them all," Gus said snicking his lighter on before touching it to the tip of his cigarette.
Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "And you'd be right, Pretty Boy."
Smirking, Gus drew a pull before bothering to respond.
"Normally, I'd offer to buy you a drink, but seeing as how you're working..."
"I'd be a bad idea. Look at you...far above the curve I'd say."
"Daddy always did say I was a smart boy."
"Ah. A self-absorbed addict. Just what I need," she said, wiping the bar down. "So tell me..."
"Gus," he supplied, watching her smirk at his name.
"Tell me, Gus, what do you do?"
"I'm a computer security consultant."
"I see. And what does a computer security consultant do exactly," she said, tossing the bar rag back under the counter.
"Companies pay me obscene amounts of money to try and hack into their systems."
Elizabeth raised an eyebrow and slowly started to nod in understanding. "So you're a rich, self-absorbed addict."
Gus smirked, taking another pull on his cigarette before tapping the column of ash into the tray. "I do all right."
Offering her first, honest smile, she said, "I get off at 1."
Returning her smile, Gus slid off the stool. "I'll be counting the hours."
He was waiting outside The Rusty Barnacle at 12:55am that night and every one that followed.
Closing his eyes, Gus tilted his head towards the sunlight and let the sounds of the waves crashing over the rocks nearby lull him into a sense of calm.
"I thought that fellow you were with was your partner," Elizabeth said, walking beside him on the beach.
Gus huffed a laugh of half-surprise/half-shock. "Charlie? Nah, he's just a friend."
Elizabeth paused beside him. "That isn't code for 'friends with benefits' is it?"
"No. First rule of friendship is don't fuck your friends."
Offering a half-smile, she said, "Well that's one I've never heard before."
"That one I got from my Dad," Gus said, offering a shy smile. One Elizabeth caught...would always catch.
"You sound like you're proud of him."
"I'm proud of both my dads," Gus said, and, for the first time in his life, he felt comfortable enough to talk about his whole assorted family.
. . . . .
Wednesday, 6:15 pm
"We promised Debbie we'd be over for dinner at seven," Elizabeth yelled out over the hair dryer.
Loosening his tie, Gus stepped into the bathroom door.
"I'm really fucking tired, El. I've got that deadline coming up on the new version of Norton, and I've still got to find the time to crack into Initech's core again..."
"A promise is a promise," she said replied, eyes brokering no argument.
Sighing and nodding, he finished undressing and slipped into the shower, and, even as the water sluiced over his skin, it couldn't erase the sense of ill ease that grew in his stomach. Something wasn't right.
. . . . .
Thursday, 1:47 am
Justin guided Gus through the emergency entrance doors as Brian followed closely behind, a grim expression set on his face.
Shortly after their arrival at the hospital, Gus had fallen silent. Not moving. Not speaking. He just shut down. It had taken a trip to the desk and threatening several lawsuits to get all the details and paperwork gathered to have his daughter-in-law's remains released to the funeral home.
Gus had signed where Brian had pointed without reading a single line, and Brian knew just by the way his son looked he'd never recover from this.
As they neared the car, he watched his son begin to visibly shake. Three feet from the passenger's side door, he dug his feet in and stopped moving.
"I can't...I can't get in."
"Sure you can. You just open the door..."
Gus shook his head. "There's no car seat for Abby. I can't loose her, too."
"It's just a short ride. Everything will be okay," Justin said, quietly.
Gus' spine went rigid, face ghostly pale as he turned towards Justin and made eye contact for the first time in hours.
"That's what El said when she agreed to drive."
. . . . .
Wednesday, 9:36pm
He watched all the action through heavily slitted eyes. Head propped against the his elbow on the table, Gus could only half-follow the conversation. Truth be told, he was more than ready to crash the second he got home, but, as his dad had always pointed out, 'You've gotta learn when to pick your battles, Sonny Boy.'
It was said the second...or was it the third time Gus rode the couch at the loft. He and his dads had spent the night drinking heavily and reliving blow-ups of years passed.
The next morning, nursing a heavy hangover while his fathers mocked his low tolerance, Justin outlined the way to break down an impossible partner while Brian pretended not to be amazed by the whole experience; his son was coming to them for relationship advice.
Of course, that advice landed him at Deb's smack dab in the middle of the week. With a newborn in the house, a deadline, and too much stress looming over his head, he hadn't slept well in weeks which was probably why he kept nodding off during the dinner conversation, but no one but his dad seemed to notice.
Somewhere between dinner and dessert, Gus slipped outside under the pretense of 'getting some air.' Even before the screen door finished slamming behind him, he had his hands up to cup his lighter as he guided it towards his cigarette. The instant that the nicotine hit his system, he felt himself grow more calm.
"If you're as tired as I think you are, you should have kept your ass at home," Brian said as he joined his kid on the porch. "And you sure as shit shouldn't be smoking," he continued, mocking tone filling his voice.
Gus huffed a laugh. "The only reason you quit was because Pops withheld sex until you did it."
Smirking, Brian sank down onto the stoop beside his son.
"So...are you going to sit out here and brood all night, or are you going to tell me what the fuck is going on so we can go back inside."
Gus turned his own tongue-in-cheek expression on his dad. "Always the word smith."
"Always avoiding the issue."
"Pot. Kettle."
Sighing, Brian wrapped his coat a little tighter around him and started to wait; Gus always did need to work things through in his head before he even attempted to verbalize them. And, yes, Brian was completely aware of where his kid had gotten that annoying little habit from.
"There's just a lot of stuff going on," Gus vaguely replied.
"Stuff," he repeated. "Work stuff? Life stuff?"
"Both I guess. Got a lot of projects going on."
"Things okay with Eli?"
Gus offered a weak smile. "It's okay. It's just a little much sometimes, yeah know? I mean one minute it's just us, and we're taking off every weekend to the beach or out clubbing..."
"And the next you've got this kid that you're responsible for. Yes, I am familiar with the concept." Brian replied, offering his own kid a smile.
"I love Abigail. I don't regret having her for a second, but I just miss the way things were..."
"That would be why you should have picked up some young, blond boy."
Gus rolled his eyes. "We can't all play house with our much younger partners."
"I just can't believe my own son turned into a breeder."
Smiling, Gus looked at his father, hearing the pride hidden beneath the barb. "It's different with El; she wasn't like anyone I'd ever met before."
A look of understanding flashed between the two of them.
"Just don't let her fucking know that or she'll have your balls," Brian said, standing.
Gus followed suit, flicking the remainder of his cigarette towards the neighbor's yard. "She already does, Dad," he replied. "But I'd say I'm in good company," he added, looking pointedly at Justin through the window.
. . . . .
Sunday, 1:25pm
"This beach was a part of her...a part of us," Gus said as he set Abigail into her baby stroller.
"I fell in love with her here."
"When I was a young chicka, my dad would take me out to this billabong by my house, and we'd spend the whole day just swimming," Elizabeth said, stretching across the blanket turned beach towel.
"Can't say we had one of those at my dad's place, but we did have a pool."
El snorted. "Jesus. Don't tell me you've never swam in the wild before, Gus."
Shaking his head, Gus sat back on the blanket was well, gazing up at the stars just like he did when he was a kid.
"Well. It's time we did something about your poor, deprived, self," she said, standing, and before Gus could say a word, she was peeling off all her clothes and jumping into the Atlantic.
At first, he was smiling at her daring behavior, but, as the time between her diving and her surface stretched out, he started to get worried.
"El," he said, standing and wading out towards the water. "El? Come on! This shit isn't funny."
Just as his panic level started to rise, she surfaced, spraying water all over his once-dry clothes.
"Come on, Gus. The water's warm, and there's no one for miles."
Gus smirked. "I didn't realize you were a Siren."
Elizabeth scrunched up her nose. "You and I both know I can't sing a lick."
Laughing, Gus started pulling off his clothes, throwing them in the general direction of the beach, and, for the first time in his life, dove in completely.
. . . . .
Wednesday, 11:25pm
The dinner party finally started to break up, and Gus couldn't be happier to be strapping his daughter into her car seat.
"Are you sure you want to drive? It's dark out."
Elizabeth laughed, taking the keys from Gus' pocket.
"You're exhausted. Besides, it's only a short distance. We'll be okay."
Nodding, Gus climbed into the passenger's seat, buckled his seatbelt, and rested his head against the icy cold window.
Even before the engine turned over, he was asleep in his seat.
. . . . .
Sunday, 1:26pm
Gus pulled the blankets up around his daughter and watched her fall into a deep sleep, hands clenching and unclenching around the pink afghan Debbie had knit for her.
"I can't believe you wore a dress," Gus laughed, opening the car door for Elizabeth.
Pointedly glaring at him, she responded. "You said you were taking me to a fancy dress place. Is it a crime to look nice?"
"I just didn't know you owned a dress."
Smiling, Elizabeth grabbed onto Gus' shoulder for balance as she unbuckled and removed the heels she'd had on for hours.
"If I'd have known you were planning on ending our little date by bringing me to the beach, I'd've brought my suit."
"And deprive myself of seeing the great Siren in action?"
Laughing, she grabbed Gus' tie and lead him out towards the water's edge.
"It's so beautiful here at night, isn't it, Gus," she asked, looking up at the rapidly sinking sunshine.
"Yeah, it is," he replied, gaze locked on her face, watching the pink-tinged light cast there.
Linking her hand in his, Gus smiled at her, knowing it was finally the right time."
"There's something I've been meaning to ask you..."
Elizabeth turned towards him. "Don't tell me you found out about my prison record," she deadpanned. "Because those were bogus charges..."
Biting his lower lip, Gus responded, "I suppose I should tell you about the couple of times I ended up in juvie."
Once again, she laughed before pulling herself flush against him and started kissing him. He pulled back first. Lips red and swollen, skin flushed with love and need, forehead resting against hers, he smiled softly at her.
"Marry me."
. . . . .
Wednesday, 11:28pm
They were eleven blocks from home when it happened. She hit a patch of black ice and over-corrected. The car's jerky motions ripped him from his sleep in time to see the incoming embankment of snow, hear his wife's screams, and Abby's cry before the car flipped over twice.
The momentum slammed them into a pine tree, front end rumpling and crushing into the trunk.
One look at El and he knew. He fucking knew.
A shaking hand reached out and stroked her hair before checking for a pulse. When Gus touched her neck, all he felt was the slippery mix of blood and the snow that fell through the cracked windshield.
A second later, he registered the smell of gasoline, of fire, and the sound of his child crying.
. . . . .
It was a small service--just her family and his. No more than thirty people. All of them standing on their beach at sunset.
She wore this simple little dress and had flowers woven into her hair, and Gus was convinced he'd never seen her look more beautiful than that moment.
. . . . .
Sunday, 1:26pm
"This beach was a part of her," Gus said, opening the small box and walking to the water's edge. He set it adrift in the water, watching the balsa wood carry her into the ocean. "And now she's a part of it."
This one is a departure from my normal style. Let me know what you think.
Sydney Alexis
It was a small service--just her family and his. No more than thirty people. All of them standing on their beach at sunset.
Friday, 9:23 am
The wood was cold and smooth beneath his touch as he eased his hand along the grain.
"That's one of our more popular models," a voice said in the distance, but he couldn't be sure if it was directed at him. After that night everything was just a blur of sight and sound.
Breath labored in his chest, the sickly sweaty feeling returned to his skin an instant before everything turned a gray haze.
The chair he was ushered in to was plush and pink. Brocade with tiny flowers in it. She would have laughed at the corporate Barbie air this place had. Probably would have made some perverse joke about it.
A cold glass was placed in his hand, fingers gripping the sides of it on instinct. Suddenly, his father was kneeling in front of him, worried expression painted all over his features.
"When was the last time you ate, Sonny Boy?"
He blinked, slowly processing what should have been such a simple sentence.
"What day is it?"
Brian reached out and touched his knee.
"We can do this later. Come back after you've eaten...rested up some."
The ice in the glass clinked against the side, and Gus thought of her laying in the morgue, body wrapped in black plastic, chilled by the freezer. Icicles clinging to eyelashes.
"Blue eyes," he said, softly, looking up at his father with a haunted expression. "She had blue eyes."
The grip on his knee tightened ever so as Brian watched his son fall apart in front of him.
Gus covered his father's hand with his own, a sudden fear striking him. "Promise me you won't let me forget. I can't forget it. The color...it's important. Her eyes weren't like Abigail's or Pop's."
Nodding, Brian rocked back onto his heels. "I promise, Sonny Boy."
Gus looked off into the distance, eyes locking on the mahogany stained walls as he considered his father's promise. "Pops will remember; he always remembers little things like that."
Lips thin, Brian nodded once again. A long quiet fell on them as he watched his son. Eyes distant, face blank, Gus would just fucking stare into space as if lost in his own memories.
Then again, no one expects to lose their wife so soon into the marriage.
He couldn't help but think that Lindz would have handled all of this better, but she and Justin were taking care of Abby while they made arrangements. Gus had insisted he should go, and Brian had a sinking suspicion it was because his son realized his father was the only one that understood what it was like to be left utterly alone by the only person he'd ever loved.
Even if it was only for a few months...
"She didn't like to ride on elevators," Gus said, suddenly meeting his father's eyes. "She hated enclosed spaces; it's why she took that fucking bus to work rather than driving."
Again, Brian nodded; he'd known all this.
"I think she'd want to be cremated instead of buried in some little box," Gus said, looking up at the funeral director for the first time in an age.
"Of course, Sir. We can arrange that," the director...Greeson Something or Other said.
"And carnations. Elizabeth loved red carnations," he said, looking down at his hand. Half expecting to find her blood still there.
. . . . .
Wednesday, 11:45pm
The vending machines and light fixtures buzzed around him. Sterilizing chemicals burned his nose. It was all too bright, too loud, to overpowering despite the haze he was in.
Abigail stirred at the movement around them, small mouth working against the binky even in her sleep.
All around him, he felt nurses and staff hovering, waiting for him to break apart.
From his pocket, he drew his cell phone. Thumb brushing against dry blood...her blood on the keypad as he dialed.
The line on the other end rang enough times that the machine picked up.
"Dad," Gus sobbed into the line. "Daddy, it's Gus. If you're there, pick up..."
No sooner had he started the word 'up' than Justin's voice filled his receiver.
"Gus."
"It's Elizabeth...I'm at Allegheny. They have all these forms to release her body, and it's almost time for Abby's feeding and I don't know what to do..."
Justin was quiet for a long, long moment. "Your dad and I will be right there, okay, Gus? Just stay put."
. . . . .
Tuesday, 4pm
"Abigail, smile for the camera," Gus said, bouncing the little girl on her knee.
As she giggled at the movement, the photographer took the opportunity to flash a couple of frames.
The grip Elizabeth had on his forearm tightened just a fraction as she smiled brightly at Gus.
"I just can't believe I finally got you do sit down and take this picture! I've been after you for how long?"
Returning her smile, he leaned across the baby to kiss her, ignoring the flash bulb in the background.
. . . . .
Thursday, 12:06 am
"Gus? Gus?"
Blinking, he looked up to find his fathers hovering above him.
"It was supposed to be a quick trip," he said, brow wrinkling. "I should have been driving. It was icy out and night. She doesn't drive that often. But I was working on that fucking article all night and I was so tired...And there was so much blood. So much of it, and she wouldn't wake up."
Brian felt the air whoosh from his lungs; it was all too familiar.
"Gus," Justin started, slipping into the chair beside his son. "Gus, where is Elizabeth?"
Haunted, red-rimmed eyes locked on Justin's, and, before the words were spoken, he knew.
. . . . .
Sunday, 11:59 am
"Your Momma loved the beach," Gus said, holding Abigail against his chest. "We met there. Did she ever tell you about that? Me and Charlie went down to Georgia one summer to meet up with his dad. Ended up at this little hole in the wall bar right off the beach where your Momma was working as a bartender.
"She was so beautiful--bright, white blonde hair, steel blue eyes, and a cute little Kiwi accent. She had this dirty mouth that could brush guys off without even batting an eyelash. And I was stupid enough to fall in love with her on sight. Charlie thought I was nuts."
"I'd offer you a really lame come on, but something tells me you've heard them all," Gus said snicking his lighter on before touching it to the tip of his cigarette.
Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "And you'd be right, Pretty Boy."
Smirking, Gus drew a pull before bothering to respond.
"Normally, I'd offer to buy you a drink, but seeing as how you're working..."
"I'd be a bad idea. Look at you...far above the curve I'd say."
"Daddy always did say I was a smart boy."
"Ah. A self-absorbed addict. Just what I need," she said, wiping the bar down. "So tell me..."
"Gus," he supplied, watching her smirk at his name.
"Tell me, Gus, what do you do?"
"I'm a computer security consultant."
"I see. And what does a computer security consultant do exactly," she said, tossing the bar rag back under the counter.
"Companies pay me obscene amounts of money to try and hack into their systems."
Elizabeth raised an eyebrow and slowly started to nod in understanding. "So you're a rich, self-absorbed addict."
Gus smirked, taking another pull on his cigarette before tapping the column of ash into the tray. "I do all right."
Offering her first, honest smile, she said, "I get off at 1."
Returning her smile, Gus slid off the stool. "I'll be counting the hours."
He was waiting outside The Rusty Barnacle at 12:55am that night and every one that followed.
Closing his eyes, Gus tilted his head towards the sunlight and let the sounds of the waves crashing over the rocks nearby lull him into a sense of calm.
"I thought that fellow you were with was your partner," Elizabeth said, walking beside him on the beach.
Gus huffed a laugh of half-surprise/half-shock. "Charlie? Nah, he's just a friend."
Elizabeth paused beside him. "That isn't code for 'friends with benefits' is it?"
"No. First rule of friendship is don't fuck your friends."
Offering a half-smile, she said, "Well that's one I've never heard before."
"That one I got from my Dad," Gus said, offering a shy smile. One Elizabeth caught...would always catch.
"You sound like you're proud of him."
"I'm proud of both my dads," Gus said, and, for the first time in his life, he felt comfortable enough to talk about his whole assorted family.
. . . . .
Wednesday, 6:15 pm
"We promised Debbie we'd be over for dinner at seven," Elizabeth yelled out over the hair dryer.
Loosening his tie, Gus stepped into the bathroom door.
"I'm really fucking tired, El. I've got that deadline coming up on the new version of Norton, and I've still got to find the time to crack into Initech's core again..."
"A promise is a promise," she said replied, eyes brokering no argument.
Sighing and nodding, he finished undressing and slipped into the shower, and, even as the water sluiced over his skin, it couldn't erase the sense of ill ease that grew in his stomach. Something wasn't right.
. . . . .
Thursday, 1:47 am
Justin guided Gus through the emergency entrance doors as Brian followed closely behind, a grim expression set on his face.
Shortly after their arrival at the hospital, Gus had fallen silent. Not moving. Not speaking. He just shut down. It had taken a trip to the desk and threatening several lawsuits to get all the details and paperwork gathered to have his daughter-in-law's remains released to the funeral home.
Gus had signed where Brian had pointed without reading a single line, and Brian knew just by the way his son looked he'd never recover from this.
As they neared the car, he watched his son begin to visibly shake. Three feet from the passenger's side door, he dug his feet in and stopped moving.
"I can't...I can't get in."
"Sure you can. You just open the door..."
Gus shook his head. "There's no car seat for Abby. I can't loose her, too."
"It's just a short ride. Everything will be okay," Justin said, quietly.
Gus' spine went rigid, face ghostly pale as he turned towards Justin and made eye contact for the first time in hours.
"That's what El said when she agreed to drive."
. . . . .
Wednesday, 9:36pm
He watched all the action through heavily slitted eyes. Head propped against the his elbow on the table, Gus could only half-follow the conversation. Truth be told, he was more than ready to crash the second he got home, but, as his dad had always pointed out, 'You've gotta learn when to pick your battles, Sonny Boy.'
It was said the second...or was it the third time Gus rode the couch at the loft. He and his dads had spent the night drinking heavily and reliving blow-ups of years passed.
The next morning, nursing a heavy hangover while his fathers mocked his low tolerance, Justin outlined the way to break down an impossible partner while Brian pretended not to be amazed by the whole experience; his son was coming to them for relationship advice.
Of course, that advice landed him at Deb's smack dab in the middle of the week. With a newborn in the house, a deadline, and too much stress looming over his head, he hadn't slept well in weeks which was probably why he kept nodding off during the dinner conversation, but no one but his dad seemed to notice.
Somewhere between dinner and dessert, Gus slipped outside under the pretense of 'getting some air.' Even before the screen door finished slamming behind him, he had his hands up to cup his lighter as he guided it towards his cigarette. The instant that the nicotine hit his system, he felt himself grow more calm.
"If you're as tired as I think you are, you should have kept your ass at home," Brian said as he joined his kid on the porch. "And you sure as shit shouldn't be smoking," he continued, mocking tone filling his voice.
Gus huffed a laugh. "The only reason you quit was because Pops withheld sex until you did it."
Smirking, Brian sank down onto the stoop beside his son.
"So...are you going to sit out here and brood all night, or are you going to tell me what the fuck is going on so we can go back inside."
Gus turned his own tongue-in-cheek expression on his dad. "Always the word smith."
"Always avoiding the issue."
"Pot. Kettle."
Sighing, Brian wrapped his coat a little tighter around him and started to wait; Gus always did need to work things through in his head before he even attempted to verbalize them. And, yes, Brian was completely aware of where his kid had gotten that annoying little habit from.
"There's just a lot of stuff going on," Gus vaguely replied.
"Stuff," he repeated. "Work stuff? Life stuff?"
"Both I guess. Got a lot of projects going on."
"Things okay with Eli?"
Gus offered a weak smile. "It's okay. It's just a little much sometimes, yeah know? I mean one minute it's just us, and we're taking off every weekend to the beach or out clubbing..."
"And the next you've got this kid that you're responsible for. Yes, I am familiar with the concept." Brian replied, offering his own kid a smile.
"I love Abigail. I don't regret having her for a second, but I just miss the way things were..."
"That would be why you should have picked up some young, blond boy."
Gus rolled his eyes. "We can't all play house with our much younger partners."
"I just can't believe my own son turned into a breeder."
Smiling, Gus looked at his father, hearing the pride hidden beneath the barb. "It's different with El; she wasn't like anyone I'd ever met before."
A look of understanding flashed between the two of them.
"Just don't let her fucking know that or she'll have your balls," Brian said, standing.
Gus followed suit, flicking the remainder of his cigarette towards the neighbor's yard. "She already does, Dad," he replied. "But I'd say I'm in good company," he added, looking pointedly at Justin through the window.
. . . . .
Sunday, 1:25pm
"This beach was a part of her...a part of us," Gus said as he set Abigail into her baby stroller.
"I fell in love with her here."
"When I was a young chicka, my dad would take me out to this billabong by my house, and we'd spend the whole day just swimming," Elizabeth said, stretching across the blanket turned beach towel.
"Can't say we had one of those at my dad's place, but we did have a pool."
El snorted. "Jesus. Don't tell me you've never swam in the wild before, Gus."
Shaking his head, Gus sat back on the blanket was well, gazing up at the stars just like he did when he was a kid.
"Well. It's time we did something about your poor, deprived, self," she said, standing, and before Gus could say a word, she was peeling off all her clothes and jumping into the Atlantic.
At first, he was smiling at her daring behavior, but, as the time between her diving and her surface stretched out, he started to get worried.
"El," he said, standing and wading out towards the water. "El? Come on! This shit isn't funny."
Just as his panic level started to rise, she surfaced, spraying water all over his once-dry clothes.
"Come on, Gus. The water's warm, and there's no one for miles."
Gus smirked. "I didn't realize you were a Siren."
Elizabeth scrunched up her nose. "You and I both know I can't sing a lick."
Laughing, Gus started pulling off his clothes, throwing them in the general direction of the beach, and, for the first time in his life, dove in completely.
. . . . .
Wednesday, 11:25pm
The dinner party finally started to break up, and Gus couldn't be happier to be strapping his daughter into her car seat.
"Are you sure you want to drive? It's dark out."
Elizabeth laughed, taking the keys from Gus' pocket.
"You're exhausted. Besides, it's only a short distance. We'll be okay."
Nodding, Gus climbed into the passenger's seat, buckled his seatbelt, and rested his head against the icy cold window.
Even before the engine turned over, he was asleep in his seat.
. . . . .
Sunday, 1:26pm
Gus pulled the blankets up around his daughter and watched her fall into a deep sleep, hands clenching and unclenching around the pink afghan Debbie had knit for her.
"I can't believe you wore a dress," Gus laughed, opening the car door for Elizabeth.
Pointedly glaring at him, she responded. "You said you were taking me to a fancy dress place. Is it a crime to look nice?"
"I just didn't know you owned a dress."
Smiling, Elizabeth grabbed onto Gus' shoulder for balance as she unbuckled and removed the heels she'd had on for hours.
"If I'd have known you were planning on ending our little date by bringing me to the beach, I'd've brought my suit."
"And deprive myself of seeing the great Siren in action?"
Laughing, she grabbed Gus' tie and lead him out towards the water's edge.
"It's so beautiful here at night, isn't it, Gus," she asked, looking up at the rapidly sinking sunshine.
"Yeah, it is," he replied, gaze locked on her face, watching the pink-tinged light cast there.
Linking her hand in his, Gus smiled at her, knowing it was finally the right time."
"There's something I've been meaning to ask you..."
Elizabeth turned towards him. "Don't tell me you found out about my prison record," she deadpanned. "Because those were bogus charges..."
Biting his lower lip, Gus responded, "I suppose I should tell you about the couple of times I ended up in juvie."
Once again, she laughed before pulling herself flush against him and started kissing him. He pulled back first. Lips red and swollen, skin flushed with love and need, forehead resting against hers, he smiled softly at her.
"Marry me."
. . . . .
Wednesday, 11:28pm
They were eleven blocks from home when it happened. She hit a patch of black ice and over-corrected. The car's jerky motions ripped him from his sleep in time to see the incoming embankment of snow, hear his wife's screams, and Abby's cry before the car flipped over twice.
The momentum slammed them into a pine tree, front end rumpling and crushing into the trunk.
One look at El and he knew. He fucking knew.
A shaking hand reached out and stroked her hair before checking for a pulse. When Gus touched her neck, all he felt was the slippery mix of blood and the snow that fell through the cracked windshield.
A second later, he registered the smell of gasoline, of fire, and the sound of his child crying.
. . . . .
It was a small service--just her family and his. No more than thirty people. All of them standing on their beach at sunset.
She wore this simple little dress and had flowers woven into her hair, and Gus was convinced he'd never seen her look more beautiful than that moment.
. . . . .
Sunday, 1:26pm
"This beach was a part of her," Gus said, opening the small box and walking to the water's edge. He set it adrift in the water, watching the balsa wood carry her into the ocean. "And now she's a part of it."
This one is a departure from my normal style. Let me know what you think.