A contradiction for all seasons
I'm feeling reflective again, so bear with me here. Then again, how TRULY reflective I'm being is questionable, seeing as how OTHER people might be reading this... much like how reality TV is never really "Reality" TV, things someone posts in a LiveJournal are RARELY (if EVER) any kind of TRUE reflection. Because when you know someone else will be reading it, you're gonna cater to that whether you're conscious of it or not. I was talking to Jeff about this earlier today... so... anyway...
For some fucking reason, I'm still awake. WIDE AWAKE. And I'm techically sick as a dog, though I'm so pumped up on cough medicine and pain killers I'm really not so sure. Kinda drowsy...
You know all that bitching I've been doing about Herron? Well... I'm still positive I don't want to stick with my art major there, BUT, I had an epiphany earlier and realized that I LOVE CHARCOAL. I love working with it. I wanna be friends with it...
One of my first charcoal pieces. I likey the skull.
This is that statue that's at the top of the steps to the Herron entrance.
My first successful still-life this semester. But...
These parts irritate the hell outta me. Got a good critique on it though. Peeps dug it.
Then tonight I felt like doin' some more, so I started this one at about 1 or 2ish. The liquid in the bowl's gonna be falling up into the glass. I don't know why. There's no... message behind this. It's just surreal for the sake of being surreal.
This is what life would've looked like if you were me twenty minutes ago. Check out that sock. It's so... clean.
So the point of this is to say that Herron actually hasn't been useless. I've found my niche in art... so now I'm going to... switch to an English major next semester. Doesn't seem like it makes a whole lotta sense, but I just DO NOT wanna go into this kinda art professionally. I wanna polish up my writing skills, immerse myself in some stories and all that mess so I can finally have some sort of sense of confidence in my screenwriting. I have so many fucking ideas that I just haven't been able to follow through with. There's countless files on my computer of scripts that go about 10 to 30 to even 80-something pages and just... stop. And then there's multiple drafts of those same scripts and it's just... it's just driving me insane that I have all these little shits that aren't going anywhere or... being seen by anyone. Yet I don't want anyone to see them until they're finished... bah.
So, this has been a nice little self-absorbed entry. These are getting more and more frequent. I think I need something to break this monotony... the monotony of this "city" (in quotes because, let's face it, Indianapolis is just Carmel -a suburb- with taller buildings and black people)... hmm... what could possibly help snap me out of this cycle, OH! I know! A trip to New York City. Wow, that's only TEN days away. Fuckin' aye.
For some fucking reason, I'm still awake. WIDE AWAKE. And I'm techically sick as a dog, though I'm so pumped up on cough medicine and pain killers I'm really not so sure. Kinda drowsy...
You know all that bitching I've been doing about Herron? Well... I'm still positive I don't want to stick with my art major there, BUT, I had an epiphany earlier and realized that I LOVE CHARCOAL. I love working with it. I wanna be friends with it...
One of my first charcoal pieces. I likey the skull.
This is that statue that's at the top of the steps to the Herron entrance.
My first successful still-life this semester. But...
These parts irritate the hell outta me. Got a good critique on it though. Peeps dug it.
Then tonight I felt like doin' some more, so I started this one at about 1 or 2ish. The liquid in the bowl's gonna be falling up into the glass. I don't know why. There's no... message behind this. It's just surreal for the sake of being surreal.
This is what life would've looked like if you were me twenty minutes ago. Check out that sock. It's so... clean.
So the point of this is to say that Herron actually hasn't been useless. I've found my niche in art... so now I'm going to... switch to an English major next semester. Doesn't seem like it makes a whole lotta sense, but I just DO NOT wanna go into this kinda art professionally. I wanna polish up my writing skills, immerse myself in some stories and all that mess so I can finally have some sort of sense of confidence in my screenwriting. I have so many fucking ideas that I just haven't been able to follow through with. There's countless files on my computer of scripts that go about 10 to 30 to even 80-something pages and just... stop. And then there's multiple drafts of those same scripts and it's just... it's just driving me insane that I have all these little shits that aren't going anywhere or... being seen by anyone. Yet I don't want anyone to see them until they're finished... bah.
So, this has been a nice little self-absorbed entry. These are getting more and more frequent. I think I need something to break this monotony... the monotony of this "city" (in quotes because, let's face it, Indianapolis is just Carmel -a suburb- with taller buildings and black people)... hmm... what could possibly help snap me out of this cycle, OH! I know! A trip to New York City. Wow, that's only TEN days away. Fuckin' aye.