(no subject)
so i got home yesterday from work and my mom was sitting on the couch balling and my sisters like mom whats wrong..and she told us that jason is leaving us for sure he was planning on was waiting for my sister and i to go to school and my mom to go to work pack all his stuff and leave...i know i should have been there for my mom but i wasnt i went in my room locked the door and went to bed..i woke up this morning to my living room all packed up and my stepdad and mom in the living room my sister stayed i left and walked out with out saying one word to him..amber came and picked me up from school..i asked if he was still there and she said yes..she told me thry found out he had been cheating on my mom and told her he didnt wanna be with her cause he wants kids and amber and i rnt his kids and he dosnt love us and hasnt loved her for 3 yrs and everything his family said bad about us was true and not only can he not be with us but he cant stand us..he told my mom she was fat and ugly...he had been planning to do this for a while cause everything is in his name and he said if he really wanted to be a jerk he would kick us out of the house..i got home and he was walking out the door with his firend he didnt even look at me..i felt as if i was nothing to him like he hadnt been there for 9 years..i know i said i didnt care but is there something wrong with us no one wants to be with us...you know im trying to be trong for my mom but i cant ake this nemore..i feel like my life is being ruined..im loosing my faith thinking how can god do this to me..all i try to do is be positive and be here for everybody and this is what i get in return..i thought my purpose was to spread gods word and since i had gone through alot i thought i could but i feel like ive been through enough allready..i hate him i know thats wrong to say but i do...if he didnt have the title to this house and could kick us out i would go break all of his stupid crap that he placed over us like all that stupid starwars shit...my house is so empty..and my heart is too...how can i tryust people when everyone i love leaves..my way to get over this is to act like its not hurting me to act like i dont care just do about life like nothings happening....i knew it was going to happen but i always thought there was a chance it would get better..well im out i cant stand to think about it much longer...plz pray for me cause i need it and please pray i can kepp my faith through it all cause im not doing too good right now with that..love ya all