bitch, bitch, bitch
Bleh. Where do I start? I am just not a happy camper. Yesterday was irritating but I got through it without a bad mood and today I'm just down. Monthly issues + life = stupidly depressing. I feel like if it werent that time right now I probably wouldn't be taking all this shit so hard.
J and I are kind of on the down side. He says he's not sure he wants to be in a relationship anymore, which I can accept, but I don't know why. I have no idea where he's coming from with this. I don't know if it's because I'm working so much that I barely get to see him and he's upset & being a guy/upset means don't deal with the problem just fugeddaboutit. I'm sort of stressed out by it but I'm just letting him take his time and make his decision. Until then I'm going on like normal it's kind of like surreal in a sense.
Then at work this morning I was mocked because I asked to be scheduled two days instead of three for the first week on the new schedule because I am a little burnt out(mostly the J thing though) and she laughed in my face. She said, "it just sounds so funny because you have weekends off all the time and you just feel like you don't because you make plans and do things. You know, it was not my intentions to keep working 16hr days 7 days a week when I hired more employees but I guess that's my problem, riiiiiight?" The only reason I have this job is for extra money so I could just be like "fuck you see ya bye" but I don't want to quit because I'm having a rough time right now. I could care less about the job itself but it's more the fact that I made a commitment and I'm sticking to it damnit. Plus, it's not like I'm whining and complaining about how tired I am and I work too much and I never have free time, etc. Yeah, sometimes I feel that way but I know what I signed up for I'm not dumb enough to go gallavanting around with my "problems." Just whatever.
My birthday is Friday, none the less, big ol' happy 22 to me. I'm excited to go see Harry Potter tonight(actually 3:15 tomorrow morning) but it also means sacrificing another night with J. *sad face* Going to Six Flags for Friday, getting fucked up Friday night at the bar, and having dinner Saturday night then working 1-830AM at the answering service and 9-3 at NAPA. So to sum up: I'm stressed, I'm overwhelmed, I'm anticipating extreme tiredness, and then it starts all over again next week. *cries*
J and I are kind of on the down side. He says he's not sure he wants to be in a relationship anymore, which I can accept, but I don't know why. I have no idea where he's coming from with this. I don't know if it's because I'm working so much that I barely get to see him and he's upset & being a guy/upset means don't deal with the problem just fugeddaboutit. I'm sort of stressed out by it but I'm just letting him take his time and make his decision. Until then I'm going on like normal it's kind of like surreal in a sense.
Then at work this morning I was mocked because I asked to be scheduled two days instead of three for the first week on the new schedule because I am a little burnt out(mostly the J thing though) and she laughed in my face. She said, "it just sounds so funny because you have weekends off all the time and you just feel like you don't because you make plans and do things. You know, it was not my intentions to keep working 16hr days 7 days a week when I hired more employees but I guess that's my problem, riiiiiight?" The only reason I have this job is for extra money so I could just be like "fuck you see ya bye" but I don't want to quit because I'm having a rough time right now. I could care less about the job itself but it's more the fact that I made a commitment and I'm sticking to it damnit. Plus, it's not like I'm whining and complaining about how tired I am and I work too much and I never have free time, etc. Yeah, sometimes I feel that way but I know what I signed up for I'm not dumb enough to go gallavanting around with my "problems." Just whatever.
My birthday is Friday, none the less, big ol' happy 22 to me. I'm excited to go see Harry Potter tonight(actually 3:15 tomorrow morning) but it also means sacrificing another night with J. *sad face* Going to Six Flags for Friday, getting fucked up Friday night at the bar, and having dinner Saturday night then working 1-830AM at the answering service and 9-3 at NAPA. So to sum up: I'm stressed, I'm overwhelmed, I'm anticipating extreme tiredness, and then it starts all over again next week. *cries*