Comments | sweet16poetry: Perfection

amadareneko in sweet16poetry

Perfection

Feb 02, 2007 15:32

Perfection ( Read more... )

Comments 5

Bamers anonymous February 13 2007, 22:58:37 UTC

So...I changed the poem a bit. Stanza 7 to be exact. Instead of
So much these eyes have seen.
They've watched me cry,
and laugh until I was blue.

It's

So much these eyes have seen.
They've watched me cry,
and laugh until I couldn’t breathe.
When I start breathing, the look in them
Just takes my breath away again.

Re: Bamers amadareneko February 14 2007, 01:47:24 UTC

consider it changed ^-^

acacia_r February 18 2007, 01:04:30 UTC

This is very beautiful, Neko. It has a sort of methodical feel to it like I like. It's not rushed or even horribly passionate, but very...content. Passion contented. The imagery is gorgeous, as always, and the overall feeling of it is perfect. Just really really lovely.

Bamers acacia_r February 18 2007, 04:15:21 UTC

This...is mine...

:P

Re: Bamers acacia_r February 18 2007, 19:18:46 UTC

haha..whoops. Your avvy throws me off every time. Ah well, it's still beautiful.