(no subject)
I just cried for like a half hour over my paper grade....
I got a D. I worked sooo hard and got a D. Do you know why? My grammar my word choice and my sentance structure. They don't like how I write. I loved writing that paper. It was more than just a D. It was a rejection of everything I am and all the ways I think by the entire UC system. It was saying that creativity is uncalled for and unacceptable. It was saying that I fucking suck.
It was for POLY SCI. and the TA wrote that I had to "consult a style manual" before I wrote another paper. She just dug into me. The entire thing was in red. the entire thing.
I'm so frusterated, I'm taking it to the professor, I think it's a good essay, I think it's nice. I really really really understand the topics. I do. I understand it beyond shit. Damn it anyways. I'm afraid I'm going to cry in front of the professor. I CAN'T do that. The only thing I can do now is study for my other finals. I have so much shit to do right now, I'm freakin out, I have to sign my apartment lease for next year tomorrow. OH WAIT! Oh never mind. I do need a money order. nvm.oh boy. later today. I just need lunch now. I need to also do some case sign up thing becasue i got in trouble for smoking. which was a whole lame story that involved me being ratted out.
god. i feel way more emotional than i've been in so long. it's like romantic rejection except academic rejection. which is even worse. it's everything that i've been working towards just drop kicked into oblivion.
I got a D. I worked sooo hard and got a D. Do you know why? My grammar my word choice and my sentance structure. They don't like how I write. I loved writing that paper. It was more than just a D. It was a rejection of everything I am and all the ways I think by the entire UC system. It was saying that creativity is uncalled for and unacceptable. It was saying that I fucking suck.
It was for POLY SCI. and the TA wrote that I had to "consult a style manual" before I wrote another paper. She just dug into me. The entire thing was in red. the entire thing.
I'm so frusterated, I'm taking it to the professor, I think it's a good essay, I think it's nice. I really really really understand the topics. I do. I understand it beyond shit. Damn it anyways. I'm afraid I'm going to cry in front of the professor. I CAN'T do that. The only thing I can do now is study for my other finals. I have so much shit to do right now, I'm freakin out, I have to sign my apartment lease for next year tomorrow. OH WAIT! Oh never mind. I do need a money order. nvm.oh boy. later today. I just need lunch now. I need to also do some case sign up thing becasue i got in trouble for smoking. which was a whole lame story that involved me being ratted out.
god. i feel way more emotional than i've been in so long. it's like romantic rejection except academic rejection. which is even worse. it's everything that i've been working towards just drop kicked into oblivion.