Therapy
I have a dependency on books that's like an addiction. It's very rare that any great length of time will go by that I don't have one book or another I'm chipping away at. A lot of what I read is fiction, but I read a lot of history as well, and that's where a huge part of the inspiration for my writing comes from. Because at it's core, my need to write comes from the need to re-write that history. I'll read something or hear about something that hurts that tender part in me, and I have to fix it. And in real life I can't. It's too late, or too far away, and I'm helpless to do anything about it. So I do the only thing I can, and I write them a better ending. I think that's why so many of my characters go through such hardship, because they're carrying the hurts and struggles of real people. But in my version, in the end the slaves are freed, the wounded are healed, the dying are saved; I rescue the characters because I can't rescue their inspirations. So, it's not an option for me to imagine a hopeless end for a story. I have to give the characters some chance of happiness, because the real people didn't, and if I doom the character, then I'll be back at square one, helpless to save anyone or change anything.