Blue Skies Are Calling Me ...
It has been a while since I've last posted something. Well, I can't say that I'm updating my other journals more frequent. I still make a round of reading everyone's posts though because I do want to know what's going on and such. Just haven't felt much like posting in a while. Writing just hasn't given me the release that I've needed of late.
I went to church with Mum on Sunday, I knew that my beliefs had been shifting from Baptist to ...... but yeah I really, really learned so on Sunday. Mum loves our church though and I can't blame her. My beliefs are still christian in nature, but different. Lol. Listening to the pastor preach was interesting because I flipped through my bible looking at things I've noted in the past 10 or so years in it. In some locations there's a note of when a friend committed suicide or just died for whatever reason. There's jotted notes of messages and lessons to be learned or taught. All in all, it just really made me realize how far I've gone from the church. I've gotten further and further away in the last few years because of my dysfunctional relationship with most of the "singles/students" my age, it started when I was in high school and now it is past the point of return. Way past the point of return, although some of them may want to keep in touch ... it never happens.
When I get in touch with friends from the past, it just seems to through all of us in the past once again and the same history repeats itself. I miss some of those friends a great deal like Taylor, Tiffany, Melissa, and my brothers (guys I called brothers for a long time, now I haven't a clue where they are or what's happening ... well except with the Boys ... Grandmother keeps me update on them). Jessica tries to keep ties with some of those old friends that we shared like Denise and Cheri, sometimes I wonder if maybe there's a reason we don't all keep in touch.
This past year has shed some light on friendships for me. Graduation was suppose to be a big event with friends and such, it didn't happen really. Thankfully Jessica and Dan made the day a wonderful event because I spent the whole day with them. Jessica tried to plan a get together with a lot of our friends, but no one came. One of my best friends was going to come with her hubby, but that didn't happen either. It just didn't happen even with all the planning and such. Birthday, let's just say that it was a repeat of graduation with some very close friends not even saying happy birthday at said friend's "happy divorce" party the night before. Gads, I feel like I've dropped off the face of the earth or that I don't really exist right now.
Tomorrow I get to spend time with Ashley and her son Xander. Maybe that will cheer me up and make me feel different about this year. Things have been on a roller coaster for hell of late. One thing after another has gotten me down, but then my own personal writing or reading has made me cheer up.
Family life, friendships, full time employment, etc. are the down part of that roller coaster. The ups on the other hand include my body ie fms, energy, and other things that I really, really needed to get straightened out. I just feel like a lost lamb at the moment.
Blah.
See this is why I haven't written in such a long time because this hasn't cheered me up.
On a happier note: I'm going to go play PM3 and see if I can go to level 4!!!
Love ya!
I went to church with Mum on Sunday, I knew that my beliefs had been shifting from Baptist to ...... but yeah I really, really learned so on Sunday. Mum loves our church though and I can't blame her. My beliefs are still christian in nature, but different. Lol. Listening to the pastor preach was interesting because I flipped through my bible looking at things I've noted in the past 10 or so years in it. In some locations there's a note of when a friend committed suicide or just died for whatever reason. There's jotted notes of messages and lessons to be learned or taught. All in all, it just really made me realize how far I've gone from the church. I've gotten further and further away in the last few years because of my dysfunctional relationship with most of the "singles/students" my age, it started when I was in high school and now it is past the point of return. Way past the point of return, although some of them may want to keep in touch ... it never happens.
When I get in touch with friends from the past, it just seems to through all of us in the past once again and the same history repeats itself. I miss some of those friends a great deal like Taylor, Tiffany, Melissa, and my brothers (guys I called brothers for a long time, now I haven't a clue where they are or what's happening ... well except with the Boys ... Grandmother keeps me update on them). Jessica tries to keep ties with some of those old friends that we shared like Denise and Cheri, sometimes I wonder if maybe there's a reason we don't all keep in touch.
This past year has shed some light on friendships for me. Graduation was suppose to be a big event with friends and such, it didn't happen really. Thankfully Jessica and Dan made the day a wonderful event because I spent the whole day with them. Jessica tried to plan a get together with a lot of our friends, but no one came. One of my best friends was going to come with her hubby, but that didn't happen either. It just didn't happen even with all the planning and such. Birthday, let's just say that it was a repeat of graduation with some very close friends not even saying happy birthday at said friend's "happy divorce" party the night before. Gads, I feel like I've dropped off the face of the earth or that I don't really exist right now.
Tomorrow I get to spend time with Ashley and her son Xander. Maybe that will cheer me up and make me feel different about this year. Things have been on a roller coaster for hell of late. One thing after another has gotten me down, but then my own personal writing or reading has made me cheer up.
Family life, friendships, full time employment, etc. are the down part of that roller coaster. The ups on the other hand include my body ie fms, energy, and other things that I really, really needed to get straightened out. I just feel like a lost lamb at the moment.
Blah.
See this is why I haven't written in such a long time because this hasn't cheered me up.
On a happier note: I'm going to go play PM3 and see if I can go to level 4!!!
Love ya!