Long Time No Post
Well...it's been awhile, ain't it?
Truth be told I read my friends' posts on LiveJournal and that's about it. I haven't posted on LiveJournal in ages (MySpace receives my attention for the most part) but I really feel the need to express myself.
And I always seem to express myself better on here.
Here goes....
I recently purchased a plane ticket to visit Michigan at the end of the month. I miss my mom, my dad, my sisters....and one particular person we'll call "S" for lack of a better letter.
I've always cared for this person; I've always wanted to be there for this person. I was hooked from the first time I met her; there's something so lively and beautiful about her soul that I could never resist her. Her warm smile, her sense of humor, the butterflies in my stomach when she hugs me - - whether she realizes it or not "S" has always overwhelmed my senses...and my heart.
It's funny...I left Michigan for two reasons. One of them was to become a man and quit playing foolish games. The other...was because I couldn't be with "S". At the time there were other...circumstances and situations that made a union between the two of us near impossible. If she would have wanted me to I would've stayed, pure and simple. I've been wanting to hold her in my arms for so long....
I've been through good relationships, bad relationships, relation-"shits", and various other symbiotic dilemmas...and at the end I always wondered how she was doing and if she was being treated well. Even when I had my head up my ass and I didn't talk to her I still wanted to be by her side so bad.
Sounds kinda desperate, huh? Lil' ol' me, asshole du jour, hung up on a woman.
She's not just and woman to me. She's...incredible, y'know? You ever see someone or hear their voice and automatically feel like it's your favorite time of year? That's how she's always made me feel. I've always tried to keep it unnoticeable, hoping to remain her friend and not do anyhing that would betray that friendship.
Easier said than done.
There's been some hiccups in our friendship, that's for sure, but it seems we somehow end up at square one in many ways.
I might possibly have a chance to be with "S"....and if there's the slimmest of chances that shes wants me I plan to make the utmost of my opportunity.
I kinda have an idea but I'm not sure how she feels about me or the prospect of possibly pursuing something....but she is the only woman to ever find my "trained knife-wielding monkey" idea worthwhile.
And for that I.....let's just say I have VERY strong feelings for her and leave it at that.
Let luck and karma be on my side...please...I want to be the man that can finally be what she wants.
Konichiwa.
Truth be told I read my friends' posts on LiveJournal and that's about it. I haven't posted on LiveJournal in ages (MySpace receives my attention for the most part) but I really feel the need to express myself.
And I always seem to express myself better on here.
Here goes....
I recently purchased a plane ticket to visit Michigan at the end of the month. I miss my mom, my dad, my sisters....and one particular person we'll call "S" for lack of a better letter.
I've always cared for this person; I've always wanted to be there for this person. I was hooked from the first time I met her; there's something so lively and beautiful about her soul that I could never resist her. Her warm smile, her sense of humor, the butterflies in my stomach when she hugs me - - whether she realizes it or not "S" has always overwhelmed my senses...and my heart.
It's funny...I left Michigan for two reasons. One of them was to become a man and quit playing foolish games. The other...was because I couldn't be with "S". At the time there were other...circumstances and situations that made a union between the two of us near impossible. If she would have wanted me to I would've stayed, pure and simple. I've been wanting to hold her in my arms for so long....
I've been through good relationships, bad relationships, relation-"shits", and various other symbiotic dilemmas...and at the end I always wondered how she was doing and if she was being treated well. Even when I had my head up my ass and I didn't talk to her I still wanted to be by her side so bad.
Sounds kinda desperate, huh? Lil' ol' me, asshole du jour, hung up on a woman.
She's not just and woman to me. She's...incredible, y'know? You ever see someone or hear their voice and automatically feel like it's your favorite time of year? That's how she's always made me feel. I've always tried to keep it unnoticeable, hoping to remain her friend and not do anyhing that would betray that friendship.
Easier said than done.
There's been some hiccups in our friendship, that's for sure, but it seems we somehow end up at square one in many ways.
I might possibly have a chance to be with "S"....and if there's the slimmest of chances that shes wants me I plan to make the utmost of my opportunity.
I kinda have an idea but I'm not sure how she feels about me or the prospect of possibly pursuing something....but she is the only woman to ever find my "trained knife-wielding monkey" idea worthwhile.
And for that I.....let's just say I have VERY strong feelings for her and leave it at that.
Let luck and karma be on my side...please...I want to be the man that can finally be what she wants.
Konichiwa.