(no subject)
"I just needed someone to talk to, you were just too busy with yourself."
this song reminds me of my cousin jason.. amy told me that the night he killed himself, he asked aunt sylvia if he could talk to her.. and she asked if it could wait until morning. that night he killed himself. i miss him so much. what would he be like now? would he have managed to help his depression? would he be on drugs? would he finally be happy? would him and vanessa have a baby? oh god, what if what if.. just another reason to cry.. i've been crying ever since i had "the" conversation with kyle, that was 4 1/2 hours ago. i may as well get a new reason since i'm not going to stop anytime soon.
amy told me mom somehow got the link to either this or my teen open diary and read it.. so i would just like to say mom, if you're reading this, please stop. i know you're curious about what goes on in my life, but i usually write either post quiz results in here or write only when i'm mad or sad, so if you read this, #1 you're going to think i'm psychotic, and #2, you're going to read something, take it the wrong way, and think lots of untrue things about me. it would be better if you would just talk to me. if i think you need to know something, i will tell you, please just don't violate my privacy like this, by reading conversations i've saved, by reading my notes, can't you see i view you as an intruder when you do that? you're my mom and i love you, but i'm a kid, i make mistakes, and i learn from them, and i don't need you to tell me what i did wrong, or even knowing what i did wrong. that's not how a kid learns.
well everyone, i'm going to get off here.. i may go to a movie or something w/ josh and ryan.. i love you guys.. everyone be safe tonight, and have fun. don't forget to wear your seatbelts, and in case i never told you guys, you are my angels. you mean the world to me and i just wanted you to know that, and how much you mean to me.
this song reminds me of my cousin jason.. amy told me that the night he killed himself, he asked aunt sylvia if he could talk to her.. and she asked if it could wait until morning. that night he killed himself. i miss him so much. what would he be like now? would he have managed to help his depression? would he be on drugs? would he finally be happy? would him and vanessa have a baby? oh god, what if what if.. just another reason to cry.. i've been crying ever since i had "the" conversation with kyle, that was 4 1/2 hours ago. i may as well get a new reason since i'm not going to stop anytime soon.
amy told me mom somehow got the link to either this or my teen open diary and read it.. so i would just like to say mom, if you're reading this, please stop. i know you're curious about what goes on in my life, but i usually write either post quiz results in here or write only when i'm mad or sad, so if you read this, #1 you're going to think i'm psychotic, and #2, you're going to read something, take it the wrong way, and think lots of untrue things about me. it would be better if you would just talk to me. if i think you need to know something, i will tell you, please just don't violate my privacy like this, by reading conversations i've saved, by reading my notes, can't you see i view you as an intruder when you do that? you're my mom and i love you, but i'm a kid, i make mistakes, and i learn from them, and i don't need you to tell me what i did wrong, or even knowing what i did wrong. that's not how a kid learns.
well everyone, i'm going to get off here.. i may go to a movie or something w/ josh and ryan.. i love you guys.. everyone be safe tonight, and have fun. don't forget to wear your seatbelts, and in case i never told you guys, you are my angels. you mean the world to me and i just wanted you to know that, and how much you mean to me.