Why God, Why?
arvus's Interests
General
Her testimonial: I check my email a thousand times a day, to make sure I never leave a message unread for more than 20 seconds. I log in to every messenger program known to man, rapidly adding any name I can find to compile gigantic lists of people I can send chain letters to. I remember to charge my cel phone EVERY day without fail, so when I can't be at my computer I can text message all the pervert losers who half-jokingly pester me for pictures of my nipples from my phonecam. It sure is a hell of a lot better than the old days, when stupid basketcase loser girls had to sit at pay phones for hours on end with ziploc bags full of quarters, trying to look disinterested and bored. Now with Myspace, I can get that same kind of complacency, only now I can show off doctored pics of myself and really get my assurance fix!
His testimonial: I'm only on Myspace because I want to meet people who go to shows and promote my band, Evil Babykiller Revival, the HARDEST fuckin GRINDCORE ever. Our lineup includes members from the original band, Evil Babykillersauce Sundae; Mike Sharp on drums, Masturbator on guitar and me, Johnny Hotcakes on lead screaming. We're a lot like an Earth Crisis/Blood For Blood/Deicide mix, with plenty of sXe philosophy mixed with good old fashioned mainlining heroin. We'll be playing at the same shitty dive every Tuesday, where we will probably be paid in Pabst Blue Ribbon and end up going home with a group of chunky Betty-Page wanabees who will take us home in their PT Cruisers. ROCK ON PARTY PEOPLE
Music
This is where I list about a hundred and fifty bands you've never heard of in an attempt to battle your Scenesterness with mine. It's like Pokemon, except instead of cuddly little japanese animated critters, we use obscure rock/emo/hardcore groups that we vaguely remember seeing while we were getting blacked out drunk at the local look-at-my-shoes bar. Instead of daring youngsters looking to establish themselves as Pokemon Master Champions, the contenders are pushing-thirty chubby alcoholics who spend their paychecks from barbacking/bouncing on hairplugs and diet pills. Instead of a prize that includes a grand cartoon parade where the happy populace assaults you with honorable bowls of rice with chopsticks comically inserted at impossible angles, you get the right to talk about yourself to other agorophobic shut-ins on the Internet.
Movies
omg Meet the Fockers is HILARIOUS yall. THE BABY IN THAT MOVIE ACTUALLY SAYS ASS-WHOLE(LoL!) also I saw Miss Congeniality 2 and it ROX! LOL! Sandra Bullock is SOOOOOOOO beautiful! I'm totally going bulemic just so I can look just like her! Then maybe daddy won't beat me with an iron skillet and make me stand naked in my closet while he hoses me down with Sunny Delight for forgetting to take the trash out! LOL! Oh ya and I saw Oceans 12 Matt Damon <;3 <;3 Brad Pitt <;3 <;3 George Clooney <;3 <;3 LOL I can't decide which I love most! George Clooney reminds me of that guy who used to live under the bridge by my house that would give me and my friend Larry money to steal clothes off of the neighbor's laundry line and bring it to him! LOL LOL hay I just remembered that my friend on MYSPACE, where I post hundreds of thousands of pics of myself where my face is strategically positioned, lighted and blurred so you can't obtain any surmountable detail about my physique whatsoever, sent me seventeen chain letters yesterday that I forgot to annoyingly forward to everyone on my Yahoo, MSN and AOL messenger lists!!!!!!!!!!11 OMG they all said that I would have bad luck or my lover wouldn't love me anymore or that a piece of my labia would be torn from me in my sleep and taken by an angel to all of the hungry Sudan children to eat whose plight I didn't help to ease by polluting the internet with more bullshit chain letters!!!!!! O NO NOW I AM SKREWED oh well I guess I'll just go back to sucking dick and eating nutter butters and taking mom's percoset gulp gulp munch gulp
Television
Everybody Loves Raymond is the greatest television show in the history of that particular communicative medium. If you argue with this indisputable fact, then you are completely wrong, a fucking retard, and should kill yourself.
Heroes
George Patton, Johnny Cash, Allan Sillitoe, Eugene V. Debs, Muhammad Ali, Bill Mahr, Franklin Roosevelt, Fidel Castro, Huey Newton, Max Hardcore, Goseki Kojima, Frank Sinatra, Kilgore Trout, Ted Turner, Ted Nugent, Jack Chick, Lionel Hutz
General
Her testimonial: I check my email a thousand times a day, to make sure I never leave a message unread for more than 20 seconds. I log in to every messenger program known to man, rapidly adding any name I can find to compile gigantic lists of people I can send chain letters to. I remember to charge my cel phone EVERY day without fail, so when I can't be at my computer I can text message all the pervert losers who half-jokingly pester me for pictures of my nipples from my phonecam. It sure is a hell of a lot better than the old days, when stupid basketcase loser girls had to sit at pay phones for hours on end with ziploc bags full of quarters, trying to look disinterested and bored. Now with Myspace, I can get that same kind of complacency, only now I can show off doctored pics of myself and really get my assurance fix!
His testimonial: I'm only on Myspace because I want to meet people who go to shows and promote my band, Evil Babykiller Revival, the HARDEST fuckin GRINDCORE ever. Our lineup includes members from the original band, Evil Babykillersauce Sundae; Mike Sharp on drums, Masturbator on guitar and me, Johnny Hotcakes on lead screaming. We're a lot like an Earth Crisis/Blood For Blood/Deicide mix, with plenty of sXe philosophy mixed with good old fashioned mainlining heroin. We'll be playing at the same shitty dive every Tuesday, where we will probably be paid in Pabst Blue Ribbon and end up going home with a group of chunky Betty-Page wanabees who will take us home in their PT Cruisers. ROCK ON PARTY PEOPLE
Music
This is where I list about a hundred and fifty bands you've never heard of in an attempt to battle your Scenesterness with mine. It's like Pokemon, except instead of cuddly little japanese animated critters, we use obscure rock/emo/hardcore groups that we vaguely remember seeing while we were getting blacked out drunk at the local look-at-my-shoes bar. Instead of daring youngsters looking to establish themselves as Pokemon Master Champions, the contenders are pushing-thirty chubby alcoholics who spend their paychecks from barbacking/bouncing on hairplugs and diet pills. Instead of a prize that includes a grand cartoon parade where the happy populace assaults you with honorable bowls of rice with chopsticks comically inserted at impossible angles, you get the right to talk about yourself to other agorophobic shut-ins on the Internet.
Movies
omg Meet the Fockers is HILARIOUS yall. THE BABY IN THAT MOVIE ACTUALLY SAYS ASS-WHOLE(LoL!) also I saw Miss Congeniality 2 and it ROX! LOL! Sandra Bullock is SOOOOOOOO beautiful! I'm totally going bulemic just so I can look just like her! Then maybe daddy won't beat me with an iron skillet and make me stand naked in my closet while he hoses me down with Sunny Delight for forgetting to take the trash out! LOL! Oh ya and I saw Oceans 12 Matt Damon <;3 <;3 Brad Pitt <;3 <;3 George Clooney <;3 <;3 LOL I can't decide which I love most! George Clooney reminds me of that guy who used to live under the bridge by my house that would give me and my friend Larry money to steal clothes off of the neighbor's laundry line and bring it to him! LOL LOL hay I just remembered that my friend on MYSPACE, where I post hundreds of thousands of pics of myself where my face is strategically positioned, lighted and blurred so you can't obtain any surmountable detail about my physique whatsoever, sent me seventeen chain letters yesterday that I forgot to annoyingly forward to everyone on my Yahoo, MSN and AOL messenger lists!!!!!!!!!!11 OMG they all said that I would have bad luck or my lover wouldn't love me anymore or that a piece of my labia would be torn from me in my sleep and taken by an angel to all of the hungry Sudan children to eat whose plight I didn't help to ease by polluting the internet with more bullshit chain letters!!!!!! O NO NOW I AM SKREWED oh well I guess I'll just go back to sucking dick and eating nutter butters and taking mom's percoset gulp gulp munch gulp
Television
Everybody Loves Raymond is the greatest television show in the history of that particular communicative medium. If you argue with this indisputable fact, then you are completely wrong, a fucking retard, and should kill yourself.
Heroes
George Patton, Johnny Cash, Allan Sillitoe, Eugene V. Debs, Muhammad Ali, Bill Mahr, Franklin Roosevelt, Fidel Castro, Huey Newton, Max Hardcore, Goseki Kojima, Frank Sinatra, Kilgore Trout, Ted Turner, Ted Nugent, Jack Chick, Lionel Hutz