oh hey guys
So it's been a few weeks and NaNoWriMo is done. Which is great. This year was kind of weird. I felt really unmotivated and getting my words in was really hard and I really felt like I didn't know where I was going with the piece. I don't know what's been happening with me writing wise recently but this entire year has been kind of a bust in that area. That's why NaNo was especially valuable this year. You can't just sit there waiting for inspiration to strike you so that you can pour out a million words. Sometimes you just have to force yourself to sit down and write something.
I haven't really worked on it since November 30th and that's because I want to really figure out what I want to do for the rest of the book. Then C and I are going to do something crazy and attempt 50,000 words in a day and I'll finish the novel (hopefully) on that day. With significantly fewer road blocks.
The holidays are coming up though so I've been scrambling to get my Christmas shopping done. Also I think part of why I haven't really been exploring my creative side is because I've been busy getting jacked. Or at least trying to get jacked. The gym I belong to isn't an affiliate of Crossfit but it's the same concept and format. It's addictive. When people talk about the cult of Crossfit they're not lying. You walk in there and you do something crazy like put 95 pounds over your head and it feels amazing. You want to do more. You want to keep going. Yesterday I went to a Crossfit competition that some of my gym people were in and I watched a girl clean and jerk 205 pounds. She didn't hold it for long enough so the attempt didn't count but it was still amazing to watch. Really inspiring. More so was the girl who completed 185lb who was about my size and build but obviously way stronger. Watching the girls do these things just made me want to hit the gym and do squats forever. I should think it's obvious but it is empowering and addicting to put a barbell in your hands and lift weight.
For the most part I've never been the kind of person who considers the exercises I do based on how I'll look in a bathing suit or in order to lose weight or to fulfill some kind of superficial vanity in myself. I just want to be strong and fast and unstoppable. So for the last month and some change I've started doing the Crossfit workouts and a strength training regime my trainer wrote out for me. I admit that I fed into the idea that only men do bench presses, that if I do stuff like bent over rows or bench presses I'll look like a man and that it will be unattractive. Because while for the most part I don't feed into the idea of female bodies and some prescribed idea of beauty I am still a product of my society. That is something that will always be on the back of my mind affecting my views, my feelings about my own body, and my opinions. The whole part of doing what I want to do and not giving a shit about outside opinions and values is fighting whatever indoctrination that's seeped into my brain from every LCD screen and piece of paper in existence.
So yeah getting under that bar and doing a bench press felt weird at first but the benefits were fast. Really fast. Everything that my trainer had me working on, targeting my shoulders and pecs, my back and my lats, it all combined to help me do my first pull-up since grade school! One day I just jumped on that bar and tried it and to my surprise I kept going up. I didn't burn out after lifting my body two inches. I did work and it was amazing and my chin went over that bar and I did it a second time and I was thinking to myself, "this shit works!" The moment that happened I had to keep going. I want to be that girl who clean and jerks 205 pounds. I want to deadlift over 200lb. I want to do 30 burpees in under a minute. Goals man. You set them and then you crush them. Or something. Back in April I made a list of goals.
1. Front and side splits. I'm so close but yet so far!
2. Going back into and recovering from a bridge. Thus far I can get into a bridge from the floor and if I try really hard I can get up from it but I cannot go back into one. A huge part of it is fear. I'm convinced I'm going to fall on my face and break my neck.
3. Be able to do pull-ups without a band for all work outs at the gym
4. Be able to do regular push-ups for all workouts at the gym
5. Do a full pike on an exercise ball. Right now I can only do the ball tuck.
6. Run a 7 minute mile. Currently my recorded best time for the mile is 9 minutes.
7. Run 10 miles continuously. Right now my longest length is 4.5 mi. The goal is to get my time really good for that length and then work my way up.
8. Handstand push-ups. This is a skill that gets put into work outs at the gym but I cannot do them so I do the rookie alternative. I want to be able to get into the push-up without walking up the wall and then eventually be able to do a handstand independent of the wall.
9. Deadlift 200 pounds.
10. Beat this girl Melissa at the gym in at least one work out using the same conditions she uses. This girl is crazy awesome. If I can best her time using her weights I'll be beastly.
11. Climb Mt. Kilimanjaro. This is something my old college roommate and I have put down for next summer and it's happening. Essentially all of my obsessive working out is to keep my strength up for the ultimate training next year that will need to be done in order to conquer that mountain.
12. This isn't really an immediate goal but it's nice to put on here as future thinking. One day, at some point, I would like to run a marathon.
13. Also. Fly.
Approximately 7 months later here is where I stand on these goals:
1. I can do the splits now and I'm working on the over splits to increase flexibility and make them real comfortable. The straddle still isn't there yet but I'm going to make it happen bitches.
2. The bridge is something I dropped off working on. I'm going to try and get back on it since I'm working on everything else.
3. I can do pull-ups now. But I can probably only do a few at a time. It's progress but I have a while before I can do them unassisted for the actual workouts.
4. Regular push-ups though? That's been handled. I am doing them and they are so much easier now than they were back in January. You don't realize the kind of improvements you're making until you do a simple body weight exercise like push-ups and you realize it's so much easier than it was before.
5. Full pike is accomplished too. I need to work on it more to make me stronger because I think it'll help with the bridge.
6. and 7. My running has been nonexistent though. During winter I just don't have any motivation to run. Instead I focus on the interval and high intensity training that is part of a Crossfit routine. It's 20 minutes of work but it has helped with my stamina and endurance a great deal. Something I am currently working on though is breath control. Really good breath control is the technique I've always been shitty at.
8. I'm a long way from this. We'll just leave it at that.
9. My current one rep max is 155lb. It's 45 pounds and I'm going to get there. My last one rep max was 130. It seems like so long to only improve 20 pounds but I know sometimes progress can be slow. I hope I can make faster gains now that I'm also focusing on strict strength training.
10. Melissa is still a beast. There is no contest.
11. Unfortunately Kilimanjaro wont be happening. My friend's foot is a beast that cannot be tamed and she will not be recovered in time for such a rigorous and demanding hike. I will do this one day though. Just maybe not in 2013.
12. Right now a half is more reasonable.
13. But I can fly. It's amazing. Also the air is cold up there.
I'll wait until the New Year to set new goals but I am actually surprised by how many of them I've managed to hit. They kind of just snuck up on me but I never stopped going for it. Now all I need is to learn how to shoot properly and I'll be 100% ready for the inevitable zombie apocalypse.
Speaking of zombies, I'm a few episodes from being completely caught up with the Walking Dead. Watching season 3 has only increased my critical and often times disappointed views on gender dynamics in that show. It's part of why I abandoned it in the first place. That and the total lack of character development, the erratic plots, and the aimlessness of the story. Still, the zombies are fucking awesome to look at, the action is good, and there is so much going on that could be right if only the writers could get their shit together.
I also need to catch up on Fringe. But I don't want to. This is the last season guys. If I never watch them it'll be like the show never ended.
::Sigh::
I haven't really worked on it since November 30th and that's because I want to really figure out what I want to do for the rest of the book. Then C and I are going to do something crazy and attempt 50,000 words in a day and I'll finish the novel (hopefully) on that day. With significantly fewer road blocks.
The holidays are coming up though so I've been scrambling to get my Christmas shopping done. Also I think part of why I haven't really been exploring my creative side is because I've been busy getting jacked. Or at least trying to get jacked. The gym I belong to isn't an affiliate of Crossfit but it's the same concept and format. It's addictive. When people talk about the cult of Crossfit they're not lying. You walk in there and you do something crazy like put 95 pounds over your head and it feels amazing. You want to do more. You want to keep going. Yesterday I went to a Crossfit competition that some of my gym people were in and I watched a girl clean and jerk 205 pounds. She didn't hold it for long enough so the attempt didn't count but it was still amazing to watch. Really inspiring. More so was the girl who completed 185lb who was about my size and build but obviously way stronger. Watching the girls do these things just made me want to hit the gym and do squats forever. I should think it's obvious but it is empowering and addicting to put a barbell in your hands and lift weight.
For the most part I've never been the kind of person who considers the exercises I do based on how I'll look in a bathing suit or in order to lose weight or to fulfill some kind of superficial vanity in myself. I just want to be strong and fast and unstoppable. So for the last month and some change I've started doing the Crossfit workouts and a strength training regime my trainer wrote out for me. I admit that I fed into the idea that only men do bench presses, that if I do stuff like bent over rows or bench presses I'll look like a man and that it will be unattractive. Because while for the most part I don't feed into the idea of female bodies and some prescribed idea of beauty I am still a product of my society. That is something that will always be on the back of my mind affecting my views, my feelings about my own body, and my opinions. The whole part of doing what I want to do and not giving a shit about outside opinions and values is fighting whatever indoctrination that's seeped into my brain from every LCD screen and piece of paper in existence.
So yeah getting under that bar and doing a bench press felt weird at first but the benefits were fast. Really fast. Everything that my trainer had me working on, targeting my shoulders and pecs, my back and my lats, it all combined to help me do my first pull-up since grade school! One day I just jumped on that bar and tried it and to my surprise I kept going up. I didn't burn out after lifting my body two inches. I did work and it was amazing and my chin went over that bar and I did it a second time and I was thinking to myself, "this shit works!" The moment that happened I had to keep going. I want to be that girl who clean and jerks 205 pounds. I want to deadlift over 200lb. I want to do 30 burpees in under a minute. Goals man. You set them and then you crush them. Or something. Back in April I made a list of goals.
1. Front and side splits. I'm so close but yet so far!
2. Going back into and recovering from a bridge. Thus far I can get into a bridge from the floor and if I try really hard I can get up from it but I cannot go back into one. A huge part of it is fear. I'm convinced I'm going to fall on my face and break my neck.
3. Be able to do pull-ups without a band for all work outs at the gym
4. Be able to do regular push-ups for all workouts at the gym
5. Do a full pike on an exercise ball. Right now I can only do the ball tuck.
6. Run a 7 minute mile. Currently my recorded best time for the mile is 9 minutes.
7. Run 10 miles continuously. Right now my longest length is 4.5 mi. The goal is to get my time really good for that length and then work my way up.
8. Handstand push-ups. This is a skill that gets put into work outs at the gym but I cannot do them so I do the rookie alternative. I want to be able to get into the push-up without walking up the wall and then eventually be able to do a handstand independent of the wall.
9. Deadlift 200 pounds.
10. Beat this girl Melissa at the gym in at least one work out using the same conditions she uses. This girl is crazy awesome. If I can best her time using her weights I'll be beastly.
11. Climb Mt. Kilimanjaro. This is something my old college roommate and I have put down for next summer and it's happening. Essentially all of my obsessive working out is to keep my strength up for the ultimate training next year that will need to be done in order to conquer that mountain.
12. This isn't really an immediate goal but it's nice to put on here as future thinking. One day, at some point, I would like to run a marathon.
13. Also. Fly.
Approximately 7 months later here is where I stand on these goals:
1. I can do the splits now and I'm working on the over splits to increase flexibility and make them real comfortable. The straddle still isn't there yet but I'm going to make it happen bitches.
2. The bridge is something I dropped off working on. I'm going to try and get back on it since I'm working on everything else.
3. I can do pull-ups now. But I can probably only do a few at a time. It's progress but I have a while before I can do them unassisted for the actual workouts.
4. Regular push-ups though? That's been handled. I am doing them and they are so much easier now than they were back in January. You don't realize the kind of improvements you're making until you do a simple body weight exercise like push-ups and you realize it's so much easier than it was before.
5. Full pike is accomplished too. I need to work on it more to make me stronger because I think it'll help with the bridge.
6. and 7. My running has been nonexistent though. During winter I just don't have any motivation to run. Instead I focus on the interval and high intensity training that is part of a Crossfit routine. It's 20 minutes of work but it has helped with my stamina and endurance a great deal. Something I am currently working on though is breath control. Really good breath control is the technique I've always been shitty at.
8. I'm a long way from this. We'll just leave it at that.
9. My current one rep max is 155lb. It's 45 pounds and I'm going to get there. My last one rep max was 130. It seems like so long to only improve 20 pounds but I know sometimes progress can be slow. I hope I can make faster gains now that I'm also focusing on strict strength training.
10. Melissa is still a beast. There is no contest.
11. Unfortunately Kilimanjaro wont be happening. My friend's foot is a beast that cannot be tamed and she will not be recovered in time for such a rigorous and demanding hike. I will do this one day though. Just maybe not in 2013.
12. Right now a half is more reasonable.
13. But I can fly. It's amazing. Also the air is cold up there.
I'll wait until the New Year to set new goals but I am actually surprised by how many of them I've managed to hit. They kind of just snuck up on me but I never stopped going for it. Now all I need is to learn how to shoot properly and I'll be 100% ready for the inevitable zombie apocalypse.
Speaking of zombies, I'm a few episodes from being completely caught up with the Walking Dead. Watching season 3 has only increased my critical and often times disappointed views on gender dynamics in that show. It's part of why I abandoned it in the first place. That and the total lack of character development, the erratic plots, and the aimlessness of the story. Still, the zombies are fucking awesome to look at, the action is good, and there is so much going on that could be right if only the writers could get their shit together.
I also need to catch up on Fringe. But I don't want to. This is the last season guys. If I never watch them it'll be like the show never ended.
::Sigh::