New Year Update!
Okay It's been a week since I moved back up to school. Thought it would be a good time to sort of check in and say what's going on and what not.
So College.
Back to College.
What are my feelings...
Oh yeah I know how I feel.
Broke.
Holy Cow.
Starving College student. That's a very true statement.
On the upside of that I'm losing weight. Mostly because I don't eat as much. Because I can't. I have to be very careful in managing my food. Also that combined with me starting up my workout routine again. Yep going to lose weight.
Now there's my classes. Two classes on Mondays, Wednsdays, and Fridays. Two on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Plus one online. So far it looks like I'm going to enjoy my Tuesdays and Thursdays the best.
Which means I'm liking my English classes the best. Hmmm. Maybe my suspicion that I need to change my major to English. We'll see how well I get into the history ones.
By far my favorite class is my Playwriting class. I mean come on! How can you not enjoy that? I get a grade for writing a play? How cool is that!? Good stuff. Good stuff.
Now that said lets talk about some stuff that I'm not too keen on.
My roommates: Not sure on them just yet. I mean their okay and all but really...dunno. Their not really the type of people that I would enjoy hanging out with outside of a roommate setting.
Sadly the same thing goes for all the girls I've met so far. Last semester there were quite a few girls that I really enjoyed being with. They were cool and mature. I suppose that's one of the biggest turn ons for me.
Unfortunetly that doesn't appear to be the case with any of the girls that I've met thus far this semester. Everyone of them reeks of immaturity. Enough that it's almost like nails on a chalkboard to listen to them gab.
sigh. That part sucks.
Also talking about the girl department. Might as well talk about this too. I once again spoke with Alisha. It was...different. It was kinda hard. But on the good side I was able to put a lot of things inside me to rest about the subject.
See you have to understand. In my religion we take getting married very seriously. We don't believe that marraige has to be something that last only until "death do you part" but rather when performed by the proper authority it lasts for "Time and all Eternity."
So needless to say you don't want to screw up when you chose your spouse.
Now Alisha did this. Everytime I prayed about her. To see if this was the type of girl I should marry. I felt great about it. (I don't believe that there's just one girl or boy for anybody but at the very least you should broach God's opinion on the matter.)
Part of the big drama that happened last year was Alisha couldn't be with me because she felt God didn't want it. That confused me a lot because I felt the opposite. Also I was (still am) of the opinion that there are somethings that God commands other things (like choosing a spouse) he just give guidence, but in the end it's our call. Who knows better who we'd be happy with than us?
So why am I bringing all this up?
Part of the big depression I had last year was that I felt God had abandoned me because he either didn't tell me what was right or he didn't tell Alisha. Kinda dumb when I look back on it. Alisha was also convinced that she had a "dream man" somewhere. Some guy she'd dreamed about and it gave her the courage to leave her slimeball of a husband.
So those were the two things she clung onto. Basically that she couldn't get involved with a guy unless she was 100% sure God wanted her to. And that this guy had to be her dream guy. Which by the way begs the question...why date at all if you know what your man looks like? Just wait until you see him.
In my hyper-emotional state I blamed God for all of this and also myself.
After speaking with her again. I came to realize that it was all her. I actually feel really bad for her. She's such a wonderful person but her marraige destroyed herself confidence. She's too afraid to take any chances. Even when she knows it to be a good thing. She's built herself a little cacoon to protect her from being hurt by another man. She's given up her free will for a hope that may never come to pass.
So I'm glad I talked to her. I was able to put a lot of stuff behind me. Part of me will always love her, but I'm moving on.
Which is why I've been reallly pissed off about dreaming about her for the last 3 days in a row! Geez! Lousy dreams!
So that's been the last week. School. Roommates, old flames, no money.
Now I just hope to get better grades. Survive moniterily and find some girl that's actually worth investing my heart in. Lofty goals for 2007 but I know that it will be better than Two Oh Six.
Peace out ya'll.
So College.
Back to College.
What are my feelings...
Oh yeah I know how I feel.
Broke.
Holy Cow.
Starving College student. That's a very true statement.
On the upside of that I'm losing weight. Mostly because I don't eat as much. Because I can't. I have to be very careful in managing my food. Also that combined with me starting up my workout routine again. Yep going to lose weight.
Now there's my classes. Two classes on Mondays, Wednsdays, and Fridays. Two on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Plus one online. So far it looks like I'm going to enjoy my Tuesdays and Thursdays the best.
Which means I'm liking my English classes the best. Hmmm. Maybe my suspicion that I need to change my major to English. We'll see how well I get into the history ones.
By far my favorite class is my Playwriting class. I mean come on! How can you not enjoy that? I get a grade for writing a play? How cool is that!? Good stuff. Good stuff.
Now that said lets talk about some stuff that I'm not too keen on.
My roommates: Not sure on them just yet. I mean their okay and all but really...dunno. Their not really the type of people that I would enjoy hanging out with outside of a roommate setting.
Sadly the same thing goes for all the girls I've met so far. Last semester there were quite a few girls that I really enjoyed being with. They were cool and mature. I suppose that's one of the biggest turn ons for me.
Unfortunetly that doesn't appear to be the case with any of the girls that I've met thus far this semester. Everyone of them reeks of immaturity. Enough that it's almost like nails on a chalkboard to listen to them gab.
sigh. That part sucks.
Also talking about the girl department. Might as well talk about this too. I once again spoke with Alisha. It was...different. It was kinda hard. But on the good side I was able to put a lot of things inside me to rest about the subject.
See you have to understand. In my religion we take getting married very seriously. We don't believe that marraige has to be something that last only until "death do you part" but rather when performed by the proper authority it lasts for "Time and all Eternity."
So needless to say you don't want to screw up when you chose your spouse.
Now Alisha did this. Everytime I prayed about her. To see if this was the type of girl I should marry. I felt great about it. (I don't believe that there's just one girl or boy for anybody but at the very least you should broach God's opinion on the matter.)
Part of the big drama that happened last year was Alisha couldn't be with me because she felt God didn't want it. That confused me a lot because I felt the opposite. Also I was (still am) of the opinion that there are somethings that God commands other things (like choosing a spouse) he just give guidence, but in the end it's our call. Who knows better who we'd be happy with than us?
So why am I bringing all this up?
Part of the big depression I had last year was that I felt God had abandoned me because he either didn't tell me what was right or he didn't tell Alisha. Kinda dumb when I look back on it. Alisha was also convinced that she had a "dream man" somewhere. Some guy she'd dreamed about and it gave her the courage to leave her slimeball of a husband.
So those were the two things she clung onto. Basically that she couldn't get involved with a guy unless she was 100% sure God wanted her to. And that this guy had to be her dream guy. Which by the way begs the question...why date at all if you know what your man looks like? Just wait until you see him.
In my hyper-emotional state I blamed God for all of this and also myself.
After speaking with her again. I came to realize that it was all her. I actually feel really bad for her. She's such a wonderful person but her marraige destroyed herself confidence. She's too afraid to take any chances. Even when she knows it to be a good thing. She's built herself a little cacoon to protect her from being hurt by another man. She's given up her free will for a hope that may never come to pass.
So I'm glad I talked to her. I was able to put a lot of stuff behind me. Part of me will always love her, but I'm moving on.
Which is why I've been reallly pissed off about dreaming about her for the last 3 days in a row! Geez! Lousy dreams!
So that's been the last week. School. Roommates, old flames, no money.
Now I just hope to get better grades. Survive moniterily and find some girl that's actually worth investing my heart in. Lofty goals for 2007 but I know that it will be better than Two Oh Six.
Peace out ya'll.