(no subject)
I dont even know where to begin, oh wait yes I do, I am stuck in a hell hole!! I am really regretting my decision to stay at school for the summer. Dont get me wrong I love the friends I have that are still down here but its just not the same. My family and my best friends are at home and I am pretty much on my own stuck in a job I absolutely hate and taking chemistry, I can think of a million other places I would rather be right now. I just get really lonely out here. Its almost as if no one really gives 2 shits about me out here. I love how when you try and talk to people they treat you as if you are not good enough to talk to them, like ur pretty much dirt. im sorry but I am way to mature to deal with people like that. I have way too much crap going on to worry about it but its hard to not let it get to you. I just cant wait to go home this thursday, maybe then I will start feeling back to normal again. My boss asked me what was wrong today and I said nothing and just started to cry, thats not normal. Nothing was wrong, at least I couldnt put my finger on it, but something just made me really sad all of the sudden. I cant wait, Ill actually get to see my friends and just hang out like we used to do this weekend. I definitely miss that a lot. Damn I wish I was 16 again! I wasnt worried about anything back then. I was just excited to be able to drive and I weighed about 110, lol. thats never going to happen again. I wish I knew what my life was going to be like in 5 years. I know where I want it to be but what I want never seems to happen so its kind of scary. Hopefully I will be done with school with an awesome job and my own house. Maybe even married which is even scarier, lol, jeez I cant imagine someone wanting to marry me. I still dont even understand why my boyfriend wants to be with me, im the biggest nerd I know. But hey I am not going to complain hes about the only really good thing I have going right now.lol