work stuff
Also, things not going so well at work.
It's a combo of my patience getting low, people being inconsiderate, and my realizing certain things.
Friday (april 1) Alisa was out sick. She wasn't feeling well the afternoon before. I said if you're not feeling well, obviously stay home, but could you call/text/message me to warn me please?
She said that of course she'd be coming to work.
I get there, I have twelve kids waiting on me because Alisa is not there. I hear that she has strep throat, so okay, not mad about her not coming in. But did I get a message? no. Plus it was our first day of swimming, so I had to change all the kids into their swimsuits (and put their clothes back on) while maintaining order in the classroom; walk twelve kids across a busy parking lot, and change them out of clothes, relinquish them to the lifeguards, and dry and change them all back. Wonderful.
It didn't go as bad as I thought it would, but still a very stressful day.
Sunday, I talked to Alisa again. She was feeling better. She told be she would be there tomorrow. I reminded her to please warn me if she wasn't coming.
Monday morning I was in, I have kids waiting on me because Alisa wasn't there. I have no lesson plan (because Alisa doesn't follow the curriculum, I have no idea what she wanted done), and I had about five minutes to put something together for the entire day.
The day actually went pretty well. when I run the classroom, I have them do things in small groups (3-5 people). Alisa has one person do something at a time, and the rest running roughshod over the classroom.
We painted seeds, then seeds sprouting, up until flowers. We talked about weather. We read books (which Alisa barely does anymore, besides a few classics that the kids are bored to death of). Overall, went really well.
Tuesday, I was prepared for her not being there. It went well.
Wednesday, I wasn't feeling well. I had no idea if Alisa was going to be there, so I dragged myself to work. She was there. She whined a bit about being sick. (Considering that of the past seven work days, she had called out sick for four of them, I was only a little sympathetic.) Also, what 27-year-old has never gotten strep throat? Especially someone that has worked with children for the past five years? I mean, I know it's possible, but highly unlikely.
the first thing I saw her do that day? (before the whining, when they were still out on the playground) Dismiss a kid trying to tell her that someone had pushed him off the playground because she was chatting with another teacher and he "shouldn't interrupt the adult talk". HELLO! YOUR JOB IS TO BE THERE FOR THE FRICKIN CHILDREN. Sure, talk to someone if you have time, but prioritize lady!
I stepped out the door, dealt with that child's problem. Brought in one kid to the bathroom. Brought in another kid to blow her nose. Finally got outside to stay. (She had been talking this entire time, barely casting a glance on the kids she was in charge of.) I notice a kid standing still, holding her arm. She had scraped it on the ground at least several minutes before. I brought her in, washed it off, put a bandaid on it.
Now I finally get to stand still outside, and Alisa comes over and we chat a little. The whining. I'm a little terse, because I'm mad she hasn't been doing her job.
We go inside, everyone heads to circletime.
they're pushing and shoving a bit, trying to get the best spots. One of them nudges the girl with the scraped arm, and she freezes, looks like she's about to cry. Alisa has only seen her shoving and pushing, and starts to say in a stern voice "No, stop that!"
I stepped in between them and start to look at her arm (from which the bandaid has been ripped). Alisa continues to say "No crying! You were-"
I turned to her and said (yelled really) "No! She is a five year old who is hurt!"
She glared back, a bit surprised (because I don't yell, and I don't challenge her often) and said "Really, Lara?" Like I did something stupid and unforgivable. the kids were all silent. I muttered "I'm going to go cool down." She said "Yeah, you do that."
I still had my coat on from outside. I went to the waterfountain. I busied myself about the room. We didn't speak at all the rest of the morning. Not a single word.
I was feeling like crap anyway, physically. During break I wrote out the daily notes for parents (or actually I wrote one and photocopied it) and then went to put my head down in the staff room. I started feeling really crappy (and teary, because times of great stress I get really emotional and cry). I went to my boss (who was gossiping around) and said I really didn't feel well and could I go home? she hemmed and hawed and said she'd get back to me in a few minutes. christina (the assistant director) saw my teary eyes and said "Uh Oh, what's wrong?"
I just shrugged and said i feel like crap and I tried to sleep and uggh. I went back to the class and tried to find something to do. Alisa called over that when I had a minute could I please come over?
I did, feeling strangely like I was heading to the principal's office. I sat. she was very quiet and calm. She said "Look, I didn't realize she was actually hurt when I was talking." She said something else. I was sort of in a fog because I didn't feel good, so I basically just went "Oh." because really, I don't care what she was thinking, that's not an okay way to act.
She kept looking at me. I really was not in the mood to peacekeep. I did say "Yeah, I know i shouldn't have yelled..." and that was it. Because I was not about to apologize for the words I said. And she looked at me. I don't quite remember what she said, but it was to the effect of "Well, what else? I can tell something is still bothering you about this situation."
i wanted to say so much. about how she's not doing her job. about how much better the class runs without her there (if i have at least a few minutes to get something together, anyway). about how she should have known that girl was hurt, because it happened on her watch.
i mumbled something about not feeling good and not having a good head to process things.
that was pretty much it for wednesday. i ended up leaving around 4:30. i slept from 5:30 pm to 7 am, waking up around 10 pm for dinner.
I called in sick for the morning of thursday, but promised my boss to be there for the afternoon, when they have no one to cover for me.
i get there around 1:30. starting doing my naptime routine. alisa had already done part of it (and done it badly). i have this clipboard with my stuff on it. she had thrown out papers that looked like garbage to her, but that I had plans for using for soemthing. I asked if they had been thrown out and just bit my lip when she said yes.
It was a little awkward and quiet with her. The last few minutes before she left we talked about one of her classes (about serial killers). she spouted off some figures that im about 80% sure are wrong. when she says these things are so obviously wrong to an intelligent person, it's hard for me to bite my tongue. and they're not usually wrong, just misunderstood.
anyways.. friday went okay. i went in for the whole day, because I was not about to strand my coworker for a busy day of swimming. we didn't have that many kids. when i first got there about a half hour early, i went to the staff room to read for awhile. i just didn't want to be around her.
then when i did get there, both four year old classes were in teh same room. presumably because alisa wanted to hang out with the other teachers. and she was ignoring children during breakfast to talk to the other teachers. (who were actually doing productive things themselves, so i don't blame them).
i heard her talking to a kid that we weren't going to have a nap today. wow, thanks for discussing that with me, Alisa. you know, seeing as i share a room with you, and you leave before naptime ends but I'm there all afternoon when they're going to be overtired and cranky. thanks.
I brought up that they get really tired after swimming. she was just kind of like "Well, if a kid want to have a nap, we'll get a cot out." I don't know why I surprised, but I was. Yes, of course Alisa, a four year old is going to pick sleeping over watching Gnomeo & Juliet with all their friends. How silly of me.
We were told to either take some of Jen/Jennalyn's kids in our room, or for one of us to go over to their room, so they could take a break. Alisa went over to talk to the, and returned and said that they weren't taking breaks. Alisa has this notion that she can do whatever she wants. And our boss usually goes along with it because Alisa is unreasonable and has a habit of causing a stink when she doesn't get what she wants. she has a way of browbeating people into following her. im certain she went over and convinced them not to take breaks, ignoring our boss's instruction. she offhandedly said that i could just stay in the room with the kids that wanted to sleep, and i said "Um, no. they can't. I need to take a break."
She said "do you want one?"
I said "No, I never do. But that's not the point. This is what our boss wants us to do, and I don't have a good reason to justify not taking a break."
She had this look on her face, like she was thinking I was a pushover. which I can be, I know. But still, following your employer's policy? a policy that has reasons and makes sense? It's a SMART thing to do.
I had the thought all day that if Alisa ever asks me to be a reference, I'm either going to refuse outright, or talk to the prospective employer and reveal how she should NOT be hired. but i wouldn't do that, because that's not fair if she's expects me to praise her.
anyways. we went to swimming. when there, she helped, but did nothing to maintain order (like making sure everyone's belongings were in their bag, or keeping our class's stuff together. bah.)
Anyway, then we sit in a viewing room separate from th pool. Alisa, Jen, Jennalyn, and I were there, plus some random parents for other kids getting swim lessons. Alisa was being especially buddy-buddy with Jen. i had the feeling that it was to show me I wasn't in favor anymore. Jen was being fairly quiet.
(We had spoken a few times when Alisa was out, commiserating about Alisa's bad lesson plans Jen was her assistant last year. She said "Remember how I was always stressed when you started working here? that's why!)"
Somehow we got on the topic of victoria's secret. Alisa and Jennalyn were joking around, "yeah, let's go blow a few hundred on lingerie!"
Jen and I were quiet.
boobjobs came up. jennalyn had one, because she literally had no boobs at all before she got one. alisa had a breast reduction in middle school, because she was having all sorts of back problems.
they were chatting about how it wasn't that expensive, you know, only about seven thousand. of course you should get one if it makes you feel better about yourself, alisa said.
she has no concept of other people's reality. she told me a week or two ago how she spent $1000 on one dress and a pair of shoes. "I mean, it was a little much, but I just put it on my credit card."
i am just filled with so much frustration and anger and resentment and jealousy and i am seriously afraid im going to burst any minute that i spend time with her at work.
i don't know why it didn't affect me so much until now. but, god. working with her, talking with her is so FRUSTRATING.
Also, what 27-year-old teacher doesn't know how to spell "kitchen"?
(The class had made these star projects - which as usual, she made, and then the kids contributed about 1/10 of it, instead of actually making something on their own - that, in part, asked what their favorite thing to play in the classroom was. Most oft ehm picked the kitchen center. So, on most of the, she wrote "kichen".
I went through them all and added the "t". She also misspelled a kid's name. It's Kyle. She wrote Klye. Even the braindamaged four year old can spell his name.
(and she doesn't have a learning disability, so im not being TOO mean and judgmental. alright, i am, but i don't care right now.)
she write these news letters for the month, and they are so stupid and filled with spelling and grammar errors that I don't want my name on it.
seriously, i have no idea how she is getting her masters. i have no idea how she passed college.
Okay....deep breaths. Maybe now that I've vented so much, I will not stab her with something tomorrow. Or hey, maybe I'll be sick enough not to go to work.
It's a combo of my patience getting low, people being inconsiderate, and my realizing certain things.
Friday (april 1) Alisa was out sick. She wasn't feeling well the afternoon before. I said if you're not feeling well, obviously stay home, but could you call/text/message me to warn me please?
She said that of course she'd be coming to work.
I get there, I have twelve kids waiting on me because Alisa is not there. I hear that she has strep throat, so okay, not mad about her not coming in. But did I get a message? no. Plus it was our first day of swimming, so I had to change all the kids into their swimsuits (and put their clothes back on) while maintaining order in the classroom; walk twelve kids across a busy parking lot, and change them out of clothes, relinquish them to the lifeguards, and dry and change them all back. Wonderful.
It didn't go as bad as I thought it would, but still a very stressful day.
Sunday, I talked to Alisa again. She was feeling better. She told be she would be there tomorrow. I reminded her to please warn me if she wasn't coming.
Monday morning I was in, I have kids waiting on me because Alisa wasn't there. I have no lesson plan (because Alisa doesn't follow the curriculum, I have no idea what she wanted done), and I had about five minutes to put something together for the entire day.
The day actually went pretty well. when I run the classroom, I have them do things in small groups (3-5 people). Alisa has one person do something at a time, and the rest running roughshod over the classroom.
We painted seeds, then seeds sprouting, up until flowers. We talked about weather. We read books (which Alisa barely does anymore, besides a few classics that the kids are bored to death of). Overall, went really well.
Tuesday, I was prepared for her not being there. It went well.
Wednesday, I wasn't feeling well. I had no idea if Alisa was going to be there, so I dragged myself to work. She was there. She whined a bit about being sick. (Considering that of the past seven work days, she had called out sick for four of them, I was only a little sympathetic.) Also, what 27-year-old has never gotten strep throat? Especially someone that has worked with children for the past five years? I mean, I know it's possible, but highly unlikely.
the first thing I saw her do that day? (before the whining, when they were still out on the playground) Dismiss a kid trying to tell her that someone had pushed him off the playground because she was chatting with another teacher and he "shouldn't interrupt the adult talk". HELLO! YOUR JOB IS TO BE THERE FOR THE FRICKIN CHILDREN. Sure, talk to someone if you have time, but prioritize lady!
I stepped out the door, dealt with that child's problem. Brought in one kid to the bathroom. Brought in another kid to blow her nose. Finally got outside to stay. (She had been talking this entire time, barely casting a glance on the kids she was in charge of.) I notice a kid standing still, holding her arm. She had scraped it on the ground at least several minutes before. I brought her in, washed it off, put a bandaid on it.
Now I finally get to stand still outside, and Alisa comes over and we chat a little. The whining. I'm a little terse, because I'm mad she hasn't been doing her job.
We go inside, everyone heads to circletime.
they're pushing and shoving a bit, trying to get the best spots. One of them nudges the girl with the scraped arm, and she freezes, looks like she's about to cry. Alisa has only seen her shoving and pushing, and starts to say in a stern voice "No, stop that!"
I stepped in between them and start to look at her arm (from which the bandaid has been ripped). Alisa continues to say "No crying! You were-"
I turned to her and said (yelled really) "No! She is a five year old who is hurt!"
She glared back, a bit surprised (because I don't yell, and I don't challenge her often) and said "Really, Lara?" Like I did something stupid and unforgivable. the kids were all silent. I muttered "I'm going to go cool down." She said "Yeah, you do that."
I still had my coat on from outside. I went to the waterfountain. I busied myself about the room. We didn't speak at all the rest of the morning. Not a single word.
I was feeling like crap anyway, physically. During break I wrote out the daily notes for parents (or actually I wrote one and photocopied it) and then went to put my head down in the staff room. I started feeling really crappy (and teary, because times of great stress I get really emotional and cry). I went to my boss (who was gossiping around) and said I really didn't feel well and could I go home? she hemmed and hawed and said she'd get back to me in a few minutes. christina (the assistant director) saw my teary eyes and said "Uh Oh, what's wrong?"
I just shrugged and said i feel like crap and I tried to sleep and uggh. I went back to the class and tried to find something to do. Alisa called over that when I had a minute could I please come over?
I did, feeling strangely like I was heading to the principal's office. I sat. she was very quiet and calm. She said "Look, I didn't realize she was actually hurt when I was talking." She said something else. I was sort of in a fog because I didn't feel good, so I basically just went "Oh." because really, I don't care what she was thinking, that's not an okay way to act.
She kept looking at me. I really was not in the mood to peacekeep. I did say "Yeah, I know i shouldn't have yelled..." and that was it. Because I was not about to apologize for the words I said. And she looked at me. I don't quite remember what she said, but it was to the effect of "Well, what else? I can tell something is still bothering you about this situation."
i wanted to say so much. about how she's not doing her job. about how much better the class runs without her there (if i have at least a few minutes to get something together, anyway). about how she should have known that girl was hurt, because it happened on her watch.
i mumbled something about not feeling good and not having a good head to process things.
that was pretty much it for wednesday. i ended up leaving around 4:30. i slept from 5:30 pm to 7 am, waking up around 10 pm for dinner.
I called in sick for the morning of thursday, but promised my boss to be there for the afternoon, when they have no one to cover for me.
i get there around 1:30. starting doing my naptime routine. alisa had already done part of it (and done it badly). i have this clipboard with my stuff on it. she had thrown out papers that looked like garbage to her, but that I had plans for using for soemthing. I asked if they had been thrown out and just bit my lip when she said yes.
It was a little awkward and quiet with her. The last few minutes before she left we talked about one of her classes (about serial killers). she spouted off some figures that im about 80% sure are wrong. when she says these things are so obviously wrong to an intelligent person, it's hard for me to bite my tongue. and they're not usually wrong, just misunderstood.
anyways.. friday went okay. i went in for the whole day, because I was not about to strand my coworker for a busy day of swimming. we didn't have that many kids. when i first got there about a half hour early, i went to the staff room to read for awhile. i just didn't want to be around her.
then when i did get there, both four year old classes were in teh same room. presumably because alisa wanted to hang out with the other teachers. and she was ignoring children during breakfast to talk to the other teachers. (who were actually doing productive things themselves, so i don't blame them).
i heard her talking to a kid that we weren't going to have a nap today. wow, thanks for discussing that with me, Alisa. you know, seeing as i share a room with you, and you leave before naptime ends but I'm there all afternoon when they're going to be overtired and cranky. thanks.
I brought up that they get really tired after swimming. she was just kind of like "Well, if a kid want to have a nap, we'll get a cot out." I don't know why I surprised, but I was. Yes, of course Alisa, a four year old is going to pick sleeping over watching Gnomeo & Juliet with all their friends. How silly of me.
We were told to either take some of Jen/Jennalyn's kids in our room, or for one of us to go over to their room, so they could take a break. Alisa went over to talk to the, and returned and said that they weren't taking breaks. Alisa has this notion that she can do whatever she wants. And our boss usually goes along with it because Alisa is unreasonable and has a habit of causing a stink when she doesn't get what she wants. she has a way of browbeating people into following her. im certain she went over and convinced them not to take breaks, ignoring our boss's instruction. she offhandedly said that i could just stay in the room with the kids that wanted to sleep, and i said "Um, no. they can't. I need to take a break."
She said "do you want one?"
I said "No, I never do. But that's not the point. This is what our boss wants us to do, and I don't have a good reason to justify not taking a break."
She had this look on her face, like she was thinking I was a pushover. which I can be, I know. But still, following your employer's policy? a policy that has reasons and makes sense? It's a SMART thing to do.
I had the thought all day that if Alisa ever asks me to be a reference, I'm either going to refuse outright, or talk to the prospective employer and reveal how she should NOT be hired. but i wouldn't do that, because that's not fair if she's expects me to praise her.
anyways. we went to swimming. when there, she helped, but did nothing to maintain order (like making sure everyone's belongings were in their bag, or keeping our class's stuff together. bah.)
Anyway, then we sit in a viewing room separate from th pool. Alisa, Jen, Jennalyn, and I were there, plus some random parents for other kids getting swim lessons. Alisa was being especially buddy-buddy with Jen. i had the feeling that it was to show me I wasn't in favor anymore. Jen was being fairly quiet.
(We had spoken a few times when Alisa was out, commiserating about Alisa's bad lesson plans Jen was her assistant last year. She said "Remember how I was always stressed when you started working here? that's why!)"
Somehow we got on the topic of victoria's secret. Alisa and Jennalyn were joking around, "yeah, let's go blow a few hundred on lingerie!"
Jen and I were quiet.
boobjobs came up. jennalyn had one, because she literally had no boobs at all before she got one. alisa had a breast reduction in middle school, because she was having all sorts of back problems.
they were chatting about how it wasn't that expensive, you know, only about seven thousand. of course you should get one if it makes you feel better about yourself, alisa said.
she has no concept of other people's reality. she told me a week or two ago how she spent $1000 on one dress and a pair of shoes. "I mean, it was a little much, but I just put it on my credit card."
i am just filled with so much frustration and anger and resentment and jealousy and i am seriously afraid im going to burst any minute that i spend time with her at work.
i don't know why it didn't affect me so much until now. but, god. working with her, talking with her is so FRUSTRATING.
Also, what 27-year-old teacher doesn't know how to spell "kitchen"?
(The class had made these star projects - which as usual, she made, and then the kids contributed about 1/10 of it, instead of actually making something on their own - that, in part, asked what their favorite thing to play in the classroom was. Most oft ehm picked the kitchen center. So, on most of the, she wrote "kichen".
I went through them all and added the "t". She also misspelled a kid's name. It's Kyle. She wrote Klye. Even the braindamaged four year old can spell his name.
(and she doesn't have a learning disability, so im not being TOO mean and judgmental. alright, i am, but i don't care right now.)
she write these news letters for the month, and they are so stupid and filled with spelling and grammar errors that I don't want my name on it.
seriously, i have no idea how she is getting her masters. i have no idea how she passed college.
Okay....deep breaths. Maybe now that I've vented so much, I will not stab her with something tomorrow. Or hey, maybe I'll be sick enough not to go to work.