[oneshot] "Chi-chink", Isshi x Nao
CHI-CHINK
Fandom: Kagrra,
Pairing(s): Isshi x Nao
Genre(s): (an attempt at) humor, fluff
Rating: PG-13-ish
Warnings: Isshi might seem a bit cuckoo in this, I totally lost his true personality XD; But other than that, nothing major to warn about. Bad jokes, mainly.
Summary: A football upsets Shin, Shin upsets Isshi and Isshi upsets Izumi. Eventually, it's time to run -and fast.
A/N: elindar won the Kagrra, round of the quiz competition I host at my journal. This fic was requested by her, as an award (requested keywords being IsshixNao +a football). Hopefully the prize is pleasant, darling!^__^ Enjoy~
Chi-chink.
"Whoa, did you see guys, did you? A record! A record!"
"Nao! You hit the lamp!"
"I did? Oh, I did. I'm sorry~"
"Do you have to kick it indoors?"
"I'm not kicking it. I'm bouncing."
"...do you have to bounce it indoors?"
"Hmm, what did you say? Hey wait a minute, where did it roll? Akkiii, move!"
"Akiya, don't let him have-"
"Now then. Let's see. Last time, I got a hundred and three. Whaddaya think, could I make 150 next? 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7-"
Chi~chink.
“NAO!”
"My... koto!"
"Shin's koto got hit?"
"Oh god."
"Sorry, Shin. But nothing happened to it, right? Solid Japanese craftsmanship, such item would stand up to an even bigger bang."
"Nao... it's okay."
"Is it? Yeah, it is. What did I say? Now, is somebody willing to challenge me? 1... 2... 3... 4..."
Worry wavering in his eyes, Isshi observed Shin who had kneeled down to the floor. The instrument that had gotten knocked off from the table was now caressed gently by the fingertips of the tiny guitarist. Maybe grunting of the white teeth had passed Nao unnoticed as Shin had muttered his forgiveness to the bassist in characteristically polite tone but when that itty bitty sound was connected to the barely visibly shaking hands, Isshi caught it: Shin was upset. And Shin's 'upset' was actually, by the standards of the other people, 'infuriated'.
And when Shin was infuriated...
From the corner of his eye, Isshi noticed that the ever so perceptive Izumi had noted the same thing. In unison, both of the men glanced anxiously at the vivid young bassist of the band who was jumping around the room, his football bouncing briskly from one knee to another.
"Nao..." Izumi tried capturing the attention of his colleague. "We were supposed to discuss the new dvd, do you remember?"
"Yeah. Go ahead, I'm listening. I'm good at multitasking."
"Yes. But could you, for instance... write down notes whilst listening... that would be multitasking too, now wouldn't it..?"
"But then I'd be coerced to stop bouncing the ball! The spirit's good now, I believe that I'm about to get to 200 soon."
"Aren't you tired by now? You could... um, rest a little and collect up some power. Yeah. How about getting some soda from a vending machine... or something." Akiya interfered. He felt anxiousness shooting up his spine as he saw Izumi starting to bite the lower lip a bit too forcefully.
"Soda?" The feet halted and the arm wrapped the ball easily to nestle in the arm pit. "Gotta admit, I'm getting slightly warmed up. Has the lobby's vending machine been re-stocked up with Pepsi already?"
"How about if you go and check that out"? Izumi's words were accompanied with dreadfully calm purring.
"Okay. As I said, feel free to start without me. Isshi will brief me up later, yeah? I won't be long. Do you want something? Shin, Isshi? Tea, perhaps?"
Shin waved his hand vaguely and Isshi shook his head in rejection. Shrugging, the bassis disappeared from the room. Instantly, loud thumps started streaming from the hallway outside as Nao decided to test the capability of his ball for basketball.
Chi~chink.
"Whoopsie daisy...."
Akiya sighed and turned around to shut the door.
“Isshi-kun.”
Akiya startled. Izumi backed a step, scared by the pleasant voice. Isshi swallowed and laid his eyes on the floor where Shin was carefully placing his dear koto in his lap. In the voice of the guitarist, there was a small steely tinge on the border of audible. The always so calm, collected and no-nonsense Shin had started raising his voice. That never happened. Well not 'never' but so rarely nonetheless that it almost equaled to 'never'.
"Krhm, yes, Shin... kun?"
"Would you be kind enough and go to confiscate the ball from him?"
Isshi felt saliva in his mouth. He kept swallowing and swallowing but the paradoxically drying throat complicated the task. To his great interest he observed, almost as if he were separated from his body, that he had started proceeding towards a panic attack. Indeed. How fascinating.
"Why me?" From his behind, he sensed the mixture of horror and relief as Akiya and Izumi realized this eruption was going to be focused on Isshi and Isshi only and thus, the two of them were hereby released from Shin's rarely but skillfully used cruel mental violence.
Hardly to anyone's surprise, this observation did not make Isshi feel any less horrified.
The small, wry smile of Shin was directed, not at Isshi but at the now safely lying koto in Shin's arms.
"I believe that it will go off with less pain if the one claiming Nao's... toy is you. Since, after all, you two are playing together anyway. In private. In the studio. After working hours."
"Nakkid," Akiya added helpfully. Neutrality wasn't a bad option but being on Shin's side, that was definitely better.
Shin raised his dangerously steady brown eyes up to Isshi. "Yes."
Silence landed in the room. The style of it varied in different spots of the room: Shin was still smiling ostensibly warmly, fingers resting on the strings of the koto in demanding wait; Akiya's attention was now amusedly fixed on squirming Isshi whereas Izumi, to who Shin's revelation had come as shockingly as to Isshi, had sat down, cheeks reddening up and paling down in turns. Isshi stood in the middle of this all, fingers wrinkling neurotically the helm of his shirt.
"You knew. Know. Well. So. Yeah. I and him, Nao... uh. He.. us. Yup." Isshi gave up. Although no one had yet expressed a single thought of offense, he felt it was better to seem a little repentant. Hanging the head in shame was also a good solution for it hide his burning bright red face from his friends.
Shin's smile widened to crushing lengths. His grip on his victim was impeccable. "Yes, I do know about you two. You're not the only ones who like to work till the small hours. Now then," Shin straightened his bearing, shook his shoulders relaxingly and started plucking the strings randomly, then soon Uzu appearing, "now Nao and the ball. Thank you. Before somebody gets hurt." The way Shin's finger plucked the string made no mistake about it: that somebody would not be a person chosen by blinded Fate.
Isshi heaved a heavy sigh as Akiya chuckled and pulled the door open. Isshi glowered at his other guitarist friend with bitterness when passing him on his way to the hallway. The door closed shut immediately after him. Through the door he heard how Izumi started crying something about him being the leader of the band and that there were things of which he was supposed to be informed first, and if not first, not last at least.
Chi~chink~
Isshi sighed again. That sound had formed fateful in his ears.
“Nao?”
No reply.
"Naooo?" Isshi hollered. When the said bassist did still not give a hint of his location, Isshi started striding down the hallway towards the echoes of the chi~chink.
At first, the blond vocalist couldn't find anything unusual that would've hinted at the chi~chink. As continuous empty, harmless hallways opened in front of him, he started to doubt that the previous metallic sound was nothing but an echo of Nao's previous failures nestled in his ears. Isshi began relaxing. Good. Maybe he'd survive from this mission relatively easily.
Isshi turned again around a corner -and this time, not to a new hallway but to the downstairs' lobby- and grimaced. Absolutely fantastic. Already, there was an irritated tiny guitarist waiting for him in the office room and soon, there'd also be a very, very unpleased drummer; Nao had vanished into thin air but his precious ball had left a recognizable mark behind. Isshi stooped down to study a large, round-ish crack that had spread over one of the windows of the lobby. Isshi rubbed his eyes in exhaustion, sitting down on one of the couches lining the walls. The day was extremely tiring.
Suddenly he felt how slender fingers tugged his pants. From behind the sofa, a pair of jittery brown eyes framed with frizzy brown hair stared up at him.
Isshi squatted down. "Nao?"
"It did not break? Did it?"
Isshi gave the window one last glance. "No." Noticing Nao was going to sigh in relief and shrug away the throbbing of his heart, Isshi hurried to add: "But it's not exactly what I'd call unbroken, either."
Nao's curly head sank onto the arms resting on the floor. "Holy fuck."
An unexpected compassion sparkled in Isshi's heart. "Move a little, will you."
Isshi packed himself into the narrow space between the sofa and the wall after Nao had managed to back a bit. "What are you doing here?"
Nao shrugged one shoulder half-heartedly. "I'm hiding. I heard steps, I figured Izumi was on his way to beat the hell out of me. Manager-san is still trying to settle the previous damages concerning the stage lights. People at accounting don't exactly love me at the moment."
"No, they really don't. It never occurred to you to learn from your past screw-ups?"
The shocked expression on Nao's face had began to dissolve. Slowly, it was replaced by a little, warm smile that was very familiar to Isshi -and what he had always find distractingly charming.
"But I thought lightning doesn't hit twice in the same tree, doesn't it now?"
"That's what they say. But you, you aren't a lightning, you're a full-blown thunderstorm." Isshi wasn't able to fully hide the slighly exhausted undertone connected to the words. Nao was all electric, in good... and in bad.
Nao's smile grew radiant. "Yeah. I'm quite feisty~" The man gave Isshi's thigh a pinch before pushing himself to a sitting position. The football had rolled under the coach during his quick landing. From there he now fished it whilst asking: "Did Izumi hear the noise? Is he mad?"
Isshi made a face of utter dread. "If I were you, I wouldn't worry about Izumi..." Then something occurred to him. "Oh yeah. At some point, Shin has seen us. Now they all know. What do you want to do?"
"About what?" Nao was fingering the ball, clearly already forgotten about the previous moments of horror, already planning new trick records.
"Well.. about them? About... us?"
"What's there to do about us?" Genuinely, childishly confused eyes turned to look up at the vocalist. "I love you and I will continue loving you, just like until today. Except with the difference that now I can be naughty in broad daylight~" Nao added on impulse.
Isshi hummed. "Well if you controlled yourself in front of the others, that'd be nice. I think this is a news that will be digested for its time. Izumi will, at least."
Nao wriggled to a better position next to Isshi. "Now there aren't others here, are there?"
Isshi grinned. "Guess no."
"Excellent." Nao wrapped his free arm around Isshi's neck and pressed his lips against the other's with playful affection. The initial thought on Isshi's mind was to shoo Nao away -anyone could've stormed into the room at any minute- but as the kiss deepened with a light yet demanding lick of a tongue, he purposely got rid off such an idea. The coach shook a little and moved forward as Isshi pushed the slender bassist down.
Just as Nao was ready to rip the clothes off of his lover's back, he felt how his other, previously occupied arm slipped free. His...
"My ball!"
"What?"
"My ball!" Nao stared at the innocent eyes flickering above him with disbelief. "Why did you take it?"
"I have no ball," Isshi sing-a-songed cheerfully, trying to re-capture the younger man's lips. But Nao, he wasn't so easily distracted.
"You took it! I see it's in your hand!" Sensing the trap, Nao tried to make a dash towards the ball but Isshi's weight on his lower body caused him only to huff in pain. "Schemer! You used me! You're Izumi's minion, aren't you?"
"Izumi is definitely least of your problems if I do not now take this ball to a place in which only the rats find it, if even them. Darling, I'm only thinking about your best interest." Isshi started backing off in front of Nao's wild eyes. Yes, he had known it from the beginning: Depriving Nao of his beloved football was as wise as stealing a Playstation 3 from a hardened geek. This was about to get ugly.
As soon as Isshi got to his feet, he stormed to the hallway, his intention being to head back to the office to the safety of Shin's firm back. To his very surprise, the floor disappeared violently from under his feet as he turned around the first corner.
"Ha-ha!" Isshi heard a victorious howl. When he was almost back to his feet, something brown-ish scurried past him in the speed of light, its destination being the ball rolling away from them. Isshi's shocked mind realised he had just been tripped up.
"Nao! Bloody hell! People living in a relationship do not tend to trip each other up!" He made an desperate dash after the bassist, reaching towards the fluttering shirt in front of him with one hand.
"And, do you know what they don't do either? They don't use low, sex-inspired tricks to steal each others' precious stuff!" Nao protested with a yelp as he felt Isshi grabbing his shirt. "Do you know who do that? Filthy, stealing hookers! Yes! You! A slut! A sinner!"
Isshi gasped for air, partly because of being upset but also for the dawning lack of oxygen. "You're not any purer than I am, mister! May I remind you that Akiya isn't necessary interested in knowing what you did with his guitar case!" The blond tried nudging harder from the shirt whilst grabbing Nao's hair with the other hand. Nao attempted at freeing himself with a violent pull but all he attained was that he tripped over his own feet and reeled backwards against Isshi. "You liked it! LIKED IT! AND NOW LET GO OF ME!"
"No, I won't, before you give in on that goddamn ball!"
"Never! It's mine!"
The ball rebounded from the wall nearby and rolled back towards the fighting couple. Swaying a bit, Nao managed to break away from Isshi enough to fall on the ball with a nasty-sounding thump.
"Let go of it!" Isshi leaned over and started tugging the ball away from the tightly squishing hands of the bassist. "Nao, for the sake of our love and our band and our country and the darn world peace, give the ball to me!"
"Never!" Nao continued crying. Losing the very little what was left of his even initially small amount of self-control, Isshi collected his power and directed all of it to a kick that sent the ball flying through the air. And....
CHI~CHINK.
Isshi froze. Nao closed his eyes.
"Well now it broke. Like, broke broke."
"Yes."
"Got broken for real. Shattered. In a thousand little pieces."
"So it would seem."
Nao scrambled to his feet.
"Now, if I may suggest as a person in the position of possessing more experience: at this rate, usually, slinking off is the best way to proceed."
Isshi tried to pull himself back together.
"No. Now we start behaving like rational, grown-up adults. We're going to get Izumi here and explain the situation. Just like real, rational adults. And I'm sure Izumi will understand that accidents happen. Rational adults comprehend the concept of an accident. Yes. And Izumi, oh, he's a very, very rational adult. A great, fine man. Yes. This is what we're go-"
“NAO! ISSHI!”
Isshi made a face. "Then again... rationality is a very comparative concept."
"I have to agree with you on this one," Nao hollered as he took to his heels. "And in this situation the most rational thing to do is to retreat to have a meeting on how the futher actions will be... and not to have Izumi in that meeting might also be a lovely ideaaaaah!" Something hard swished past Nao's head. Finally Isshi too got himself to full speed.
As they ran through the front door of the building, accompanied by proper insults and curses, and continued across the parking lot at full steam, Isshi muttered: "Nao... from now on, all sorts of balls are forbidden from you. Footballs, basketballs, volley balls, golf balls, ping pong balls, globes... any and every."
To catch his breathing, Nao dived behind a van parked nearby. As inhaling deep, he couldn't prevent a giggle escaping his lips. "All balls, you say?"
"All," Isshi confirmed puffing as he collapsed next to Nao.
"Even..." cunningly sparkling eyes met with Isshi's above a chest out of breath. "Your... balls?"
"Especially my balls," Isshi groaned but soon, melted into laughter and gave then the bassist a chaste kiss.
“Naoooooo!”
A bloodthirsty yell ringing from the other side of the parking lot forced the couple to break the kiss.
"Oh well, and then... to be continued!" Nao shouted and darted up.
"Wait!"
Not Isshi or Nao, and definitely not Izumi spurting after them in rampage, and not even Akiya, who tried to stay with the latter one if not for any other reason but to later identify the bodies as the police would arrive, did notice a dark-haired young man who had just gotten out of his car and who was now staring at the chase with round enlargened eyes.
Kai shook his head. He had always considered Kagrra as a calm, rational band. But rationality... he shrugged and dropped the car keys into his bag, rationality, he guessed, was one of those comparative concepts.
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additional A/N: Yeaah, Miss Rii is in complete darkness when it comes to writing funny stuff XD; Isshi is a total flutter-nutter here, not to mention the others. Except Nao. He's just his adorkable self~
And, I wasn't sure how one expresses in English the sound of a breaking glass, so after experimenting a little with different aftertastes, I ended up using chink. I'm aware that in slang, 'chink' the substantive has a very impolite meaning. The story has nothing to do with that.
Riikka, hopefully this was even somewhat to your liking :D Writing Shin was highly amusing, thank you for giving me a chance for it ;D
Miss Rii bows and logs out. Good night, babes~
edit: some grammar mistakes and misspelling have been fixed. Writing when being tired is not a very good idea-.-