Meme and Rec
I recently finished Amazon's Transparent and really liked it. Did anyone on my FLIST watch it? If not, I recommend it. Without spoiling too much. Most of the press on Transparent focuses on its study of gender expression sexuality. However while Transparent does a fine job of that, I felt its study of parenting and reform Judaism in America meant
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1. I love them. It's interesting that Willow/Xander became the EWWWW! dogly ship of the Buffyverse while Hermione/Ron is a universal OTP in Harry Potter fandom. There's overlap in Harry Potter/BtVS fandom. Willow/Hermione and Xander/Ron occupy similar roles in their Trios. They started out friends as children. What's the difference? Well, I think people look askance at Willow/Xander because their intimacy was infidelity. Also because it started out as Willow crushing on Xander but him not reciprocating in not an especially sensitive manner which created a war where many were turned off to the ship because Xander was a jerk. Meanwhile, defensive Xander fans or anti-Willow fans hated the ship because Willow having a longing crush and being disappointed when Xander goes for someone else, whether she's unleashing after Xander stopped her after catching him and Cordelia or keeping her feelings between her and a SHS girl's toilet, is a sign of reverse sexist EVOL.
But whatever, that controversy draws me to Willow/Xander like a moth to a flame. Hermione and Ron share their most pivotal emotional moments and epic heroing with Harry. The Hermione/Ron is the comic relief in the grander epic story of Harry Potter and the Trio as a group. Meanwhile, Willow/Xander share comic relief but also darkness, a longer relationship between core characters who aren't vampires, their own fights, their own ethics conflicts on the big issues of the day. Maybe I need to read the books again an adult- but I think Willow/Xander are deeper than Ron/Hermione even though I'd never say that BtVS is deeper than Harry Potter.
2. This is so subjective! I also think Alyson Hannigan had her best romantic chemistry with Nick Brendan compared to Seth Green, Amber Benson, and Iyari Limon. Actually, I think Alyson is marvelously talented but kissy-moments are a weaker point for her as an actress where she's just *good* with most of her onscreen love interests. Meanwhile, I think Nick Brendon is good but he's not as absolutely compelling and transcendent as an actor in general as Alyson but he was consistently great at acting sexual and romantic chemistry with his female romantic love interests.
For a couple who only kissed in like, five eps and almost kissed, Alyson and Nick marvelously executed all shades of intimacy. Adorable (WSWB). Blissful and then, guilt-ridden (Homecoming). Juvenile, bordering on pathetic or age-appropriate depending on your outlook. (Band Candy). Passionate (Revelations). Darkly romantic (Lover's Walk). Wacked out EVOL sexy (The Wish).
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I think S4 Xander had a legitimate beef that he felt abandoned by the Scoobies. However, I think he has much less of an argument against Willow than Giles and Buffy. First, Xander made a choice all on his own to distance himself from Willow because of the Fluking and because frankly, he was out to be more than their childhood friendship. Throughout S4, I never see Xander making any kind of effort to draw closer to Willow. He commutes to campus to see Buffy and he's an eager shoulder for Buffy's personal problems who goes out of his way to engage with her (putting off his bartending boss to talk to her, going off on the Initiative mission with Buffy over Anya's objections). He tries very hard to draw closer to Giles. He constantly goes to Giles's house and even tries doing stuff like book sorting to hang out. However, Xander makes no effort to be closer to Willow in S4.
Meanwhile, unlike Buffy, Willow actively commuted to Xander's Basement of Debasement in Wild at Heart, Something Blue, Doomed, and No I in Team on personal excursions. And let me tell you, it's kind of depressing to commute from campus to cheapo residential suburbs in one's freshman year of college. Willow swallowed hanging out with Anya to have some Xander-time and clearly resented it. "Do you think the umbillical cord between you and Anya can stretch that far?" "It was fun...except for the poker part and the Anya-part." When Xander started preemptively making phony excuses on why he wouldn't want to go to the Halloween frat parties, Willow interrupted him with a "No duh"-toned "You can come!" since she'd invite Xander to anything short of a threesome with Tara if Xander would just frigging ask.
4. However to not cheat and provide original content. This is Personal Canon but I feel so strongly that it might as well my Unpopular Opinion. Xander called and emailed Giles non-stop in the summer between S6 and 7, desperate to see how Willow was doing. In every phone call, Xander would ask to talk to Willow. (Buffy called too- but far more infrequently and in a far more stand-offish manner. Dawn would lurch from effusive love and forgiveness one week to angrily relaying messages of hurt and anger that Giles was instructed to relay back to Willow in the next week to sullenly making an obligatory phone call another week. It was really Dawn-mood dependent. LOL.)
In every phone call, Giles told Xander that Willow wasn't ready to talk to him and Giles never told Willow that Xander already forgave her for everything and wanted to be friends. Giles believed that Willow would work harder at learning responsible magic and her new humility could calcify into long-term character growth if Willow spent some time afraid that she lost the respect and love of all of her friends. When Giles sent Willow back to California all, " I'd love to offer you some guarantee that you'd be welcomed back to Sunnydale with open arms, but I can't. You may not be wanted, but you will be needed", Giles was absolutely lying through his teeth re: Xander.
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