Life here @ UCSD
So I've been really really happy. I really love it here in San Diego. Yeah, there's some things that bother me but I mostly just stay away from those type of situations or people. It's nice. It's like my mind returned back from the stormy seas back into the clear blue harbor - safe. I am safe. I feel safe.
As for what waters lie ahead...I don't really know. I'm feel like I'm moving away from this whole pre-med thing. I'm really attracted to art and literature. I am very atracted to philosophy. I don't know what to say. I don't know what I should do. I'm taking these science classes and I'm not really loving them anymore.
I guess I would love the career as a doctor. I want to help people. But it feels like I want to help people in other ways than just giving them pills or cutting them open and figuring out what's wrong. Like I feel like I want to help people from inside. I want to challenge the inner folds of our consciousness and how we think. Isn't there something kinda wrong if sometimes there's always that looming feeling that world is going crazy? Like somewhere out there lots of human beings are being killed in genocides. They are being killed just cuz they are there. I just feel like human beings in philosophy don't know what's up. Either they've been deluded w/ a detached believing in their religion or they just can't figure out of old ways. Or...iono. Something else.
What do I want to do w/ my life?
Today I took the school shuttle to Eleanor Roosevelt College in UCSD. This is the newest built college...the most prettiest maybe. It's long white buildings w/ bridges to and fro and geometrically shapped doors and square windows. The sun showned everything white and planar. Planar bridges overlooking far away apartments of Thurgood Marshall College. Then the dining hall called "Cafe Ventanas". Three stories of glass make many large windows. They shone w/ delight that today was yet another spotless blue sky day. I kept staring w/ my mouth open. Everything was sooo beautiful. Everything was so clean and clear. Boundless space so open. It felt surreal. I felt like this might be a subsector of heaven.
I had a quesadilla w/ beef. Too much for me. I usually eat in my dorm's common room surrounded by my suitemates and we laugh a lot. I make miso soup, rice, or wonton soup. I like my food much better. Much cheaper.
Ah, but now I have to go and write a damned ethnic studies essay. Damnit.
As for what waters lie ahead...I don't really know. I'm feel like I'm moving away from this whole pre-med thing. I'm really attracted to art and literature. I am very atracted to philosophy. I don't know what to say. I don't know what I should do. I'm taking these science classes and I'm not really loving them anymore.
I guess I would love the career as a doctor. I want to help people. But it feels like I want to help people in other ways than just giving them pills or cutting them open and figuring out what's wrong. Like I feel like I want to help people from inside. I want to challenge the inner folds of our consciousness and how we think. Isn't there something kinda wrong if sometimes there's always that looming feeling that world is going crazy? Like somewhere out there lots of human beings are being killed in genocides. They are being killed just cuz they are there. I just feel like human beings in philosophy don't know what's up. Either they've been deluded w/ a detached believing in their religion or they just can't figure out of old ways. Or...iono. Something else.
What do I want to do w/ my life?
Today I took the school shuttle to Eleanor Roosevelt College in UCSD. This is the newest built college...the most prettiest maybe. It's long white buildings w/ bridges to and fro and geometrically shapped doors and square windows. The sun showned everything white and planar. Planar bridges overlooking far away apartments of Thurgood Marshall College. Then the dining hall called "Cafe Ventanas". Three stories of glass make many large windows. They shone w/ delight that today was yet another spotless blue sky day. I kept staring w/ my mouth open. Everything was sooo beautiful. Everything was so clean and clear. Boundless space so open. It felt surreal. I felt like this might be a subsector of heaven.
I had a quesadilla w/ beef. Too much for me. I usually eat in my dorm's common room surrounded by my suitemates and we laugh a lot. I make miso soup, rice, or wonton soup. I like my food much better. Much cheaper.
Ah, but now I have to go and write a damned ethnic studies essay. Damnit.