Where Does My Mom Fit In My Life?
So I write about this not for pity or anything. Cuz I no longer really believe that there are things out of my reach to not let affect me. Like yes, life is shitty but like...that whole "I can overcome all that shit and still kick ur ass" mentality. I'm trying to figure out what to do about this. So my mom barged into my room last night and demanded for all the car keys and was like totally screaming and threatening to hit me and shit like that. She was mad cuz she didn't notice me come home from Mikey's party. I was like already asleep for an hour and she's yelling like this. She then raises her fist and brandishes it over my head and says:
"I slit your throat if you don't pass that math test".
Oh, ok, thanks mom. Thanks for the encouragement. Cuz I really don't have any confidence in math anymore and that just helped a lot. I get really nervous when I think about my math grade and I get worried and it makes me sad and then I can't concentrate. Thanks mom. Can't you see sometimes how you don't help me?
But then check this out...then the next day on Sunday she comes home and she is nice as a button...NICE AS A BUTTON to me. Sweet voice. Gets me all this food. And she sees me look kinda sad and angry and she asks why. She asks me why I look like there's something bothering me. Well...u know mom...last night u threatened to kill me again and you made motions like u were going to hit me. If I wasn't already half asleep then I would have cried myself to sleep. Well maybe not anymore cuz I've just NUMBED myself up to these situations. But better yet, w/ the help of Frankie and Ben I now UNDERSTAND that you are a hyper-active, EMOTIONAL lady. Thank goodness for friends. Do you see how they feel like they are all I have? Do you see how I find it very very hard to TRUST YOU?
Yes, this was bothering me early today. I'm ok though. This is my life. I'm not going to let this bog me down. Yes, I have a emotional mother who overreacts. I'm sorry if this has ever made things awkward around my friends or affect the quality of my relationships. It's just something I have to deal with. Cuz...afterall...she is my mother.
"I slit your throat if you don't pass that math test".
Oh, ok, thanks mom. Thanks for the encouragement. Cuz I really don't have any confidence in math anymore and that just helped a lot. I get really nervous when I think about my math grade and I get worried and it makes me sad and then I can't concentrate. Thanks mom. Can't you see sometimes how you don't help me?
But then check this out...then the next day on Sunday she comes home and she is nice as a button...NICE AS A BUTTON to me. Sweet voice. Gets me all this food. And she sees me look kinda sad and angry and she asks why. She asks me why I look like there's something bothering me. Well...u know mom...last night u threatened to kill me again and you made motions like u were going to hit me. If I wasn't already half asleep then I would have cried myself to sleep. Well maybe not anymore cuz I've just NUMBED myself up to these situations. But better yet, w/ the help of Frankie and Ben I now UNDERSTAND that you are a hyper-active, EMOTIONAL lady. Thank goodness for friends. Do you see how they feel like they are all I have? Do you see how I find it very very hard to TRUST YOU?
Yes, this was bothering me early today. I'm ok though. This is my life. I'm not going to let this bog me down. Yes, I have a emotional mother who overreacts. I'm sorry if this has ever made things awkward around my friends or affect the quality of my relationships. It's just something I have to deal with. Cuz...afterall...she is my mother.