(no subject)

[sullybabe2000]

So I realized something...I'm on my way to trouble. Very quickly. I forgot how good the feeling was. I thought maybe...well I don't know. I had hope. Hope is always the most dangerous emotion. It always tricks me into feeling safe, feeling loved, feeling happy. But it's an illusion. It's not real, and I'm not all right. I never have been and I'm starting to believe I never will be. I have a hard time realizing when to put up a fight or give up. I don't know when to give it everything I've got or just wait for it to pass and see what's left at the end. I can't figure out whether it's worth fighting or if I should just be resigned. I don't know if I'm strong enough or if I'm just going to crumble. And if I do fail and fall, how far? Will I be able to climb back up?

"But you really need to listen to me
Because I'm telling you the truth
I mean this, I'm okay!
(Trust Me)

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
Well, I'm not okay
I'm not o-fucking-kay"