「The Tear Of Joy」《Chapter 10》
Title:: The Tear Of Joy
Pairing:: Ohno Satoshi/OC, Ohno Satoshi/Ninomiya Kazunari
Genre:: angst, romance, drama, office!au
Length:: chaptered
Word Count:: 7157 words
Rating:: NC-17
Feeling his throat so dry, he wanted to cough, but just swallowed a bit of saliva instead to see if it stopped because he did not want to wake up that man who was completely grabbed to his neck and torso. His eyes gazed at his messy hair falling, perfect to brush, or his thin, lower lip, perfect to kiss. His chin was pouting even while he was asleep, so Ninomiya could not handle his smile. That man… He had never found such a creature. For the boss, Ohno was the model employee, always working, standing out, helping everyone, admired by his bosses. However, under that perfect face, there was a moody man, who was usually complaining about everything, showing a rude face and disliking everything which could bother him. And much deeper than all of that, he was lucky to find a warm man. Someone who was able to give anything for the ones he loved, someone who was there every time he needed help, someone who needed to be loved because he was cuddly and affectionate. What Kazunari liked the most was how rude he could seem, but after all, when the truth was revealed, Ohno was just shy. How his fluffy cheeks started to be reddish and the sweat fell through his temples.
Ninomiya sighed while biting his lip not to smile that widely. He truly liked that man beside him. He was truly into him. So much he was crazy even to do that with Satoshi being married. He never thought he would be able to interfere in a marriage like that. But when Satoshi was near, his body felt so reckless. It moved by itself, always searching for a way to erase every armour and find out the real Satoshi. Just who he was naturally. So when he discovered it once, Kazunari became addicted to that face of his, ending up always attempting to get it no matter what, where or how. His whole being yearned for him. And he could realize it in his last trip. Being apart from him had hurt him more than he expected. Kazunari thought it was going to be harder because his body would tend to feel hot with Ohno, but when he noticed it was not that, but that he was missing as crazy his hugs or his kisses, even his complains, pouts or smiles, Ninomiya knew something was wrong there. That was the reason why he had never had a proper, stable relationship with anyone. Because he was unable to feel something strong in his heart. However, with Satoshi, it happened so easily, no matter how he tried to stop his feelings, that somehow he was being a mess of what he could do. Of course, Satoshi had his life done. A wife, a house, a job. He was only his toy. Although he was horribly into his employee, there was no way Ohno would choose him in the end. No way he would feel the same. And he was scared of what he would do when that moment would arrive. Would he be again as lonely as before? He had Sho and Masaki, but how warm his heart was with Ohno… Nobody had gotten such a thing before.
Feeling again that burning pain into his chest, he decided to move him slowly to drop Ohno on his bed and cover him a bit more. Both were naked and even if it was hot, he did not want his employee to fall ill. So not caring about how Satoshi could complain even asleep, his hands raised the blanket until his armpits. One of them brushed his hair softly. He was so naïve and unprotected… Ninomiya felt a hole inside of him when he thought he was not going to be the person who would take care of him in the future. He was not going to be the one who would love him or who would spend the days with. He was not going to be chosen by Ohno.
With watery eyes, he stood up in the middle of the night to dress some clothes and went to the kitchen. He caught a glass of water to drink and see if that knot in his throat would disappear. Meanwhile, he checked his phone and Sho had written to him. It was four am, the message was sent at one am. He prayed his reply would not disturb him.
From:: Sakurai Sho
Hi, bro. I'm sorry if I sounded so bothered today, but really, meeting your mistress wasn't nice. You know I don't support it, he's married, don't you see how troublesome that may be for you? Your life has already had so many scandals so try to think a bit about yourself. I hate doing this, but even if that man seems a nice person, it's impossible, Nino. Reconsider it, please.
From:: Ninomiya Kazunari
First, don't call him my mistress, he's more important than that. Second, it's worse for me if I let him go. Third, I don't care about scandals, I just want to finally be happy with someone and you know it. And fourth, I won't reconsider it. I'm sorry, Sho. I won't give up unless he is the one who breaks ties with me. It's already decided.
Ninomiya wrote that feeling even sicker. All of that was overcoming him. Better said, those feelings. Those feelings regarding Ohno which were killing him everyday. A really small part of himself was hating it so much, it was hating the fact of possibly falling in love with his employee. There were so many obstacles that his mind was wondering why his heart continued to fall in his claws. It wondered what Ohno had that made him be unable to stop following him anywhere constantly. Ninomiya needed to know why. Why a married man? Or maybe, what fit better his feelings. Why did Ohno have to be married? Because after all, he did not want any other man in his life; the biggest obstacle was that marriage. That corrupt marriage they had. His wife was possibly cheating on him and Ohno did nothing. Why? If he could get divorced, Ninomiya would be able to try it, so why did Satoshi stay still? Every night sleeping by her side, living with her, sharing the same stuff… Perhaps even kissing every morning… Smiling at her… Making love to her…
Kazunari breathed deeply, trying not to sob and throw the glass against the wall. That anger inside of him, that jealousy, that pain. All of that was being a hell for him. Seeing how such a woman was getting the affection of Ohno made him be sick. She deserved the worst, or at least she did not deserve someone as Satoshi by her side. Satoshi did not deserve being treated like that, being cheated, being humiliated by the person who swore eternal love to him. No, and he would not allow it. Kazunari was sure of helping him to open his eyes and forget her. He would give his best to protect him no matter what, against the whole world if it was needed.
Being already so tired and even cold, Kazunari returned to the bed silently to sit down on his side to try to lie down, finding that Ohno was in the middle of it and he was unable to. Kazunari rolled his eyes and moved him a bit at least to place him over his body. As expected, the employee growled disturbed and hid his face on his neck. “Where did you go?” suddenly, he asked between babblings. The boss brushed his hair to make him relax.
“I was just thirsty. Sleep, Satoshi” his voice was tender not to wake him up more. The man over him moved like cuddling up and kissed his neck.
“What time is it?” his lips touched slightly his skin while talking and Kazunari felt a hard shiver. Even half asleep, he found different ways to provoke him. The boss sighed wondering why was he asking that.
“Four am, that's why-“
“Happy birthday, Kazunari…” he cut off his words to say that, that small phrase which made Ninomiya's heart pound as crazy. If it continued like that, Satoshi would discover it because his hand was over his torso, so near his heart.
“Thank you…” his lips muttered while his eyes were observing the ceiling. His arms hugged him tightly, trying not to lose him. Could he control that? Could he make him stay? What would he do without him? Once he already tasted the flavour happiness had when he was with Ohno, his whole being refused to lose it. He refused to give up that easily when it was the first time he felt something as pure as that inside of his chest.
You will be mine someday…
*****
It was normal for him to wake up before that man, who loved sleeping. So he opted to do breakfast. His hands covered more that naked piece of art and he went to the kitchen. Indeed he had nothing to eat properly, just those typical packets of coffee. How did Ohno like being with him if he was such a mess? He doubted if he should go out and buy something, possibly his employee would be truly hungry. After all, last night, Kazunari had really gotten him so tired. The boss showed a naughty smile; he loved remembering how Ohno looked up at him and asked more. How his mouth was half-opened because he wanted a kiss. How his legs were wrapped around his hips to deepen it. How he could feel his desire, the desire of wanting more and more, of wanting Ninomiya no matter what. Why though?
The boss had never felt handsome or cool. What was more, when he was a kid, he was a geek of games and manga. That changed because that was not proper of the CEO's son. Everything was because he was the son of... He sighed, leaning his hands on the worktop. That was still too recent. He should continue to do their breakfast instead of thinking awful memories again. That was why he started to prepare two coffees in silence. He planned to carry them to the bedroom and wake him up. However surprising him a lot, when he turned around with both cups in his hands, his eyes met Ohno's, which looked at the coffees with a smile. So that made him happy. Ninomiya could not help but notice how he was dressed up. Just his boxers and shirt. That was so provocative. So much he gulped not to throw himself to devour that man all the times he wanted and stretched his arm to give him his cup. Satoshi muttered a thank you and drank a bit of it. They kept on drinking it there, without talking and being completely okay with it. Sometimes, Ninomiya stared at him too long and when Ohno noticed him, he laughed cutely. The boss could not assure his face was not red because it was embarrassing, being caught like a teenager observing his partner. Slowly, Satoshi left the cup in the sink and even if there was still some coffee in his, Kazunari could not wait anymore. His hand searched for that waist to approach their bodies and rub their noses.
“Let's take a shower together” he proposed and Satoshi smiled interested in it. He nodded and Kazunari smiled widely. He was truly happy to be able to do that. Then, the boss went to prepare a few towels while seeing Ohno was checking his phone. He wondered if he was answering Matsumoto... Yesterday's messages reflected how good friends they had become and he was wondering if that was a good idea. After all, Jun was the man who threatened Ohno. However, he wanted to control himself and give him space, that was why he went to the bathroom to get it ready. Shortly after, his employee appeared with a moody expression and Kazunari could not help but frown wondering if something bad had happened. Even like that, Satoshi only undressed and placed himself under the water. He watched how affected he was but he had no idea by what. Slowly, he ended up naked and joined the shower. Cuddly, he hugged his waist by behind. However, he felt him so cold. Why? What had happened?
Satoshi turned around with his wet face and not because of the water falling. Kazunari got so worried and caught his cheeks. “What's wrong? Tell me, Satoshi” he spoke showing his concern the best he could. Ohno's answer was his lip being bitten. It seemed like he did not want to say it. Should he leave it like that? No, he did not think so. That was why, he kissed his lips as tender as he could. “Tell me, please” he insisted, possibly forcing Ohno to do it.
“My wife will spend two days in a trip with a friend” abruptly he smiled. “Do you know how many times I've asked her for a trip and she has always refused it?” his lip was almost bleeding if he did not stop. Kazunari kissed him to save it and be close to him. He did not know who was angrier, if Ohno himself or Ninomiya. Just watching how he was suffering ripped his heart out of his chest. That woman was destroying him and even if Ninomiya hated admitting it, he could say Ohno truly loved her or at least he had loved her. Maybe that was what bothered him the most.
How can you still love her, Satoshi?
Slowly, his hand brushed his wet hair to place it backwards and approached his chin to his shoulder. Without a doubt, two arms hugged his torso tightly. They both were naked under a cascade of hot water, but the only thing he felt was how he was shivering. Could that be... rage? “I can take you on a trip wherever you want. You don't need her” his words were harsh, perhaps he said too much. Perhaps it was too early to treat like that his marriage. He had no right to talk about it, much less deciding what to do. With hesitation, he looked back at Ohno when the latter raised his head like a puppy.
“It's not that, but thank you” his voice tried to sound as sweet as possible accompanied with a tired smile, but Ninomiya could see how hurt he was lately regarding his wife. He acted like he did not care, however he behaved like this again. Which were his true feelings?
“I know it's not the fact of just a trip. But then, what is?” he asked and decided to take the shower meanwhile. His hands were filled with soap to rub Satoshi's skin slowly. His torso and shoulders at a low speed, waiting to hear his answer. Abruptly, his employee took his hands to stop him.
“I can do it” his cheeks were flushed and the boss understood he was just being shy. His heart pounded hard inside his chest by that soft expression. So because of that, he smiled to kiss his right commissure and continue after.
“Let me take care of you. Just say all that it's bothering you meanwhile” he attempted to be as tender as possible so Satoshi would feel the most cared person of that world. That was how he wanted to treat him the rest of his life. That was how he wanted Ohno to be treated. And the latter only placed his forehead on his shoulder, allowing him to continue to clean his body.
“Do you remember the first day of your trip when you called me? I met Jun” he started to tell him, but the first part was already disturbing him horribly. So indeed they met to drink after work. He could not avoid being jealous. “He told me that when my wife and I were in the university, therefore we were just lovers, she cheated on me with him” he spoke lowly, maybe trying not to be heard with the water noise. But unluckily, Ninomiya caught each word perfectly and his anger grew up in seconds. “The best was that he didn’t know she was with me. So she ended up cheating on both at the same time” he laughed tiredly. The boss stopped his hands to wash them and made him raise his head. Indeed, he was crying. All that woman did was a lie. They already had the proof of it.
“Why are you still with her?” he asked without hesitation. She had already showed how despicable and horrible person she was so why Satoshi was still by her side. It was unthinkable for him. Maybe, indeed he was right. Maybe Ohno would choose her before him.
“It's not easy. I'm someone who everyone admires, who seems as having the perfect life, who has everything he wants. So losing all of that suddenly it’s... Scary. And so hard” his eyes looked up, looked at him with a fear, with a scare that Ninomiya had not seen before in the eyes of anyone. Was he that scared? Was his life that scary? How could he help him? How could he make it stop scaring him? How could he set Ohno free from the claws of that woman? He needed to know to save him. Ninomiya wanted to save him from that constant unhappiness no matter what. So where could he find the answers? What could he do? Was he that useless? Being there, in front of him, unable to do a single step to comfort him. Finally, Kazunari only surrounded that tiny body with his muscled arms to protect him. To protect that soul he was showing in that shower. Being completely naked, both his body and soul. That was why his grip became tighter.
“I won't let anything bad happen to you. I promise” he muttered, maybe undressing his soul shyly too. With Satoshi it was okay. For sure it was okay when his employee only hugged him back even tighter. His warmth was everything he needed to be alright.
*****
Why had he accepted? After all, he was better surrounded by papers and numbers instead of drunk people, who were his employees. It was his birthday, he should be happy his people wanted to celebrate it with him, but somehow he was not the type of person who enjoyed such a thing. That was why after that hard day regarding Satoshi, his feelings and the work, that party was becoming something hard to handle instead of joy and fun. Luckily, in that party, Ohno was there, at the other side of the long table though, beside Jun also, but he was there at least and just admiring him from time to time was okay.
His hand was only grabbing a beer, which was half full because it was not like his body accepted too well the alcohol. Anything he drank could affect him the double or triple, so there was no doubt he had to be careful or he would end up being drunk and doing who knew what... The whole party, then, was focused on contemplating his boy. That cute man with red cheeks and sleepy eyes. He spent too much time that it was normal if Satoshi found him several times; the boss only continued without caring while his employee was flushed by embarrassment instead of by alcohol and that made the boss desire him even harder. Why was he suffering that much? He would love to take him home and make love to him as many times as possible, all his body could bear. Because indeed, he was mesmerized by such creature.
Not being taken aback, once of the times he was figured out by Ohno, the latter stood up to surround all his coworkers difficultly, leaving Jun behind, who looked speechless. Slowly, his employee approached him to lean on his shoulder and sit down beside the boss. Ninomiya glanced at the rest of people there, who were drunk also, but looking at Satoshi weirdly. He knew that his employee would not have taken that risk publicly. “How much have you drunk?” his mouth talked to Ohno, but he still did like they were not. The other man only chuckled effortlessly.
“You should know it after looking at me the whole evening” he spoke slowly, as his tongue could not move properly. Then, Kazunari noticed a person glancing at them while frowning. Suddenly, Ohno leaned his head on his shoulder, producing a small heart attack on the boss. He blinked several times, not knowing what to do; everyone there were widening their eyes without hesitation. Luckily, Jun appeared quickly to remove the almost-asleep Ohno from Ninomiya's side and apologize just to show that Satoshi was being so out of place without reason. Somehow, Kazunari thanked him mentally, but in the other hand, he wanted to be like that in public. Having him in his arms. Kissing him in the street. Holding hands as something normal. That was why he looked so disappointed when Ohno leaned his head on Jun's shoulder. Jealous. Disturbed. It was not because he did not trust his friend, but because with Jun, Satoshi could do whatever he wanted, however with him, Satoshi could only act as an employee. And he hated being just a boss for him in public. With all his might.
Being already too moody like to enjoy his own party, he glanced at Jun and moved his head to indicate him to follow the same path. Ninomiya stood up and went to the toilets; at the next minute, Matsumoto was coming inside. That situation was quite uncomfortable, so he tried to end it as fast as he could. “I will take Ohno home, just help him to go outside that I will be there waiting for him” his words were authoritarian, possibly still doing as a boss. He did not expect an answer back, that was why he was going to exit the toilets when a hand caught his arm.
“What are you trying with him?” Matsumoto's voice was deep. Kazunari frowned, not knowing such a docile worker could have that face. He turned around and found a serious man. Somehow, his appearance had a respectful aura.
“It’s not your business” he answered, not caring about how intimidating he could seem. Ninomiya was already used to handle with that type of attitude.
“It is, because I care about him” Jun spoke straight after his reply and the boss raised his right commissure to show the attempt of a smirk.
“Then, answer me and I will answer you. Why are you his friend?” he planned at the next instant, knowing that he would fall in his claws if he wanted his thoughts aloud. The worker looked troubled, but opened his mouth ready to talk.
“At first, it was because he asked, better said, obligated me to be his friend while being drunk. But he's a wonderful person, who doesn't deserve having such a wife, that's why I ask you which your intentions are” he told the boss not looking too sure, that indecision was reflected into his eyes. Kazunari raised one eyebrow. Had Satoshi asked him to be his friend? How odd could it be?
“Don’t take me as someone who likes breaking marriages. He's special” his explanation was brief, not giving details so he would not know too much, even if he was finding out Ohno and Jun were closer than he expected.
“I just hope you will make him open his eyes” suddenly, he said such a thing and made Ninomiya frown. “I will carry him outside, wait for us” without waiting for his answer, Jun continued talking and after leaving the boss trying to understand what he meant, the coworker exited the toilets. What did he mean? What did he want to say in reality? Did he have to read between lines? Did Jun accept their affair? Did Jun want him to stop that marriage? Why? Was Satoshi so unhappy like to have friends who would think cheating on his wife was a correct idea?
Ninomiya left the toilets to approach his employees, glancing at Ohno being caught by Jun, and he spoke. “Everyone, thank you so much for this celebration, I had a lot of fun. But unluckily I have to leave because I still have so much work undone. Continue enjoying the night for me” he said goodbye to everyone there and they complained a bit, but said goodbye to him too. Meanwhile, he was taking his jacket and briefcase to leave and his eyes were watching how Jun apologized by Satoshi's behaviour.
“Now that Ninomiya boss will leave, I think Ohno needs to sleep, see you tomorrow guys” Kazunari heard how the friend talked with the rest of people before he left the Remedy's and waited beside the building. He would take Ohno's car and would go to his house. He needed to rest no matter what, how could he be so stupid like to drink that much? Suddenly, he listened to small complains and mumbles. Then, Matsumoto appeared dragging Satoshi tiredly. He seemed a kid.
Ninomiya approached to grab Ohno. “C’mon, Satoshi, let's go home” his arms embraced his waist and the employee smiled when he could wrap his neck.
“Sleep with me” Ohno asked with a weak smile, being so cuddly and close to Ninomiya that the latter was glancing at Jun, who was so out of place there.
“First, let's arrive home” he tried to convince him to start to walk, but unexpectedly, Satoshi kissed him without a doubt. In the middle of the street. In other circumstances, he would have loved that public display of affection, but he was just panicking, stopping him in any way, looking around with a heart attack. Luckily, he only found an amazed Jun observing them.
“Please, I don't want to sleep alone” Ohno continued like nothing bad had happened, flirting as just a few times Kazunari saw him and he decided that Satoshi being drunk was so dangerous to control.
“Tell me where your car is and give me the keys” the boss opted to keep on his attempts to go home instead of scolding him and worsening everything. With a pout, Ohno looked down to start to touch his pockets. At last, he got the keys, but his hand hid them.
“First, a kiss” he played cuddly. The boss was already losing the hope of not being discovered. His gaze checked the street quickly, watching how Jun had his mouth half-opened and he fulfilled his wish. His lips kissed Satoshi's for two seconds, closing his eyes and embracing him tighter.
“Happier? Now, behave and let me take you home” he reproached him with husky voice and Satoshi gave him the keys to be willing to walk. Before following him, he turned around to thank Jun and the latter bowed at him back.
Figuring out how hard walking with Ohno was, he just prayed the car was near. Luckily, when they turned the corner of the next building, they found the car and Kazunari sighed relieved, soon they would be able to rest. That was why he placed Satoshi on the copilot seat and he sat beside him. Just when he was inserting the key to turn it on, a sudden image appeared in his mind. How another car crashed against his. He gulped, trying not to panic, but his body was already sweaty and trembling. There was no way he could allow that at that moment, no one else could drive. He had to. Nothing bad would happen, not that again. It was true he had drunk as that night, that he was driving as that night, that he was not alone in the car as that night, that it had happened exactly one year ago, the night of his birthday. However, he knew it would be okay.
“Kazunari, why aren't you driving?” he asked half asleep already.
“I was just thinking about where your house was” he lied. He could not know about that, the reason why he stopped driving. Why he could not drive a car again. That was why, he breathed deeply and moved the car slowly. It would not happen. Not again. He would not let Satoshi end as Masaki. It was impossible. He would drive slowly, carefully, looking everything. They would arrive safely. He had to trust himself.
“You know? It's so nice when you drive. You do it so well…” Satoshi commented with a smile while observing him. Ninomiya smiled at him back and that helped him to relax. He was okay by his side. He could overcome that panic. So when he realized it, they were arriving and he sighed relieved. So much he had his eyes watery. When would he be able to accept what happened that night?
Slowly, he tried to get Ohno out of the car without hitting him anywhere and he was already so tired of walking that irregular that, knowing there was no one in his house, Ninomiya grabbed his butt. “Jump” and Satoshi wrapped his legs around his hips to be carried inside the house. Being still so playful, the boss began to feel kisses on his neck.
“Take me to the bed and fuck me” he muttered beside his ear. He would not do that, he had already too much knowing he was having an affair with a married man like to even do it in the bed where his wife and he slept together. He hated his wife indeed, but his values were not that despicable and inhumane.
“No, you will sleep” the boss rejected the idea, but Satoshi did not like it.
“I need you… Please” Ohno bit his lobe and seduced him so badly. Ninomiya was already feeling a heat inside of him which was fighting against his rational side. He stopped in the middle of the hallway to look at Satoshi, who caressed his cheek and kissed his lips softly. Why was he handling his desire like that? Why was he caring too much about his marriage? Indeed, he could not be that selfish, because after all he knew he was ruining his life. Ohno would be the man who cheated on his wife and he would be the man who broke a couple. He wondered why it had to be like that. Why if he was just loving a man.
“Okay” he changed his path to the living room, dropping Satoshi on the sofa, realizing how perfect he was. How his jacket was a mess, how his shirt was half opened, how his tie was untied, how his feet were already removing his shoes. His eyes were showing how the employee was waiting for him to possess him once again. To surround his being and heal it from the pain. So Ninomiya removed his jacket and shirt to kneel on the sofa and unbutton Ohno's. His lips searched for his skin to taste, feeling it better than the alcohol itself. He would love to leave a mark on his neck, show his love, his property. But of course he could not, because Satoshi was not his.
Suddenly, he heard a loud moan and realized he had bitten one of his nipples too hard when his feelings filled his being. His lips kissed it as an apology and his hands began to work by themselves, removing every clothes they found touching any part of his body possibly, while he was kissing and licking his skin as if he had the best flavour of that world. When Ninomiya was in front of Ohno, his mind was null and the beast inside of him got out to admire who he was able to. That man who was able to drive him crazy just with a smile. Who was able to make his heart soften with just a caress. Who was able to cheer him up with his pouts. He wondered what he was feeling inside him. That pressure, which became pain, which squeezed his stomach, which provoked his throat had a knot in the middle, which ended up being horrible when he was alone and his mind could not stop thinking about him. Why was that provoked thanks to Ohno's presence?
Everything is your fault…
He thought while smelling his neck, feeling two arms around his neck and a weak creature gasping powerlessly. Why was he so mesmerized by Ohno? Why could he affect the boss like that? Why was his heart falling in his trap so carelessly? As if it did not mind the fact he was married and that was just an affair which would last a few months, if he was able to believe he was important for Satoshi for only those few months, he would keep on accepting it. No mattering his feelings, no mattering how his chest ached. Ninomiya would love to whisper beside his ear if it was okay to fall in love with him, and actually he could because Satoshi was truly drunk and excited like to understand and remember it. However, the boss was unable to say such a sentence. Mostly because he already knew the answer.
“Kazunari… You're taking so long…” Ohno complained with that cute pout of his and his eyes half-opened and teary. His hand brushed his hair to uncover his forehead so that his lips were able to leave a soft kiss on it.
“My boy is truly impatient…” he muttered with a smile. When he gazed at his employee after such an action, Ohno was looking away, totally flushed and tense. What a good reaction… Kazunari would pay millions to live that moment over and over again. How it was the perfect timing to bite his lobe and spoke. “Ride me then” his smirk was evident, his teeth catching his lower lip lustily. He wanted to see how Satoshi could move, how he could control him. For first time, Ninomiya would allow him to take over and possess his body all he wanted and craved for.
That was why, even not having Ohno's answer, just an amazed pair of eyes and the obvious excitement fulfilling his body were enough for Kazunari to stand up and stretch a hand. His employee sat and took it hesitantly. Then, when they both were face to face, the boss noticing how Ohno was in need of touches, finally his hands released it as big as just a few times of his life. The trousers and underwear fell alone and his feet finished the job. At that moment, being in the same condition as Ohno, he only stared at him, waiting to see how much he could handle the desire in him. After a few seconds, indeed he started to look troubled, like wondering why Ninomiya was still. So slowly, the employee approached, putting his two hands on his waist, to kiss his lips softly. This was his real scent, no matter how hard he could do it, Ohno was sweet, so sweet even sugar could not win him. And probably, Kazunari loved it too much that was why he needed to make love to him without stop. Because when he wanted to just fulfil their words and what they had called to themselves, he was not able to treat Satoshi as just someone to fuck and forget after. He would love it, but unluckily his fate was not that.
“Sit down and I will ride you…” suddenly, that shy man spoke in front of him and Ninomiya showed a serious grimace. He could not pretend to be what he was not. He could not pretend to use Ohno for having a good fuck. He could not mostly because when he sat and Satoshi placed himself over his thighs, his eyes just admired how wonderful he was. Because when he was waiting just the start of it, he employee decided to caress his face and kiss his neck. Because when he noticed he yearned for that for the rest of his life, his gaze became watery. Something inside of him was hating the possibility of having such the bad luck of falling in love with a married man, but when his arms hugged his torso tightly and his body felt his warmth, the fear of that being the reality disappeared, his mind only imagining how beautiful that moment was being. And thanks to that, he was able to breathe deeply and focus on only that man, and nothing else than that man.
Slowly, he realized how impossible thinking was when Satoshi went down for first time while leaning on his shoulders. If his brain was working, it was only to understand the gorgeousness of that God over him. And more when he only had to be still and watch how Ohno moved up and down at a slow speed, moaning breathlessly. Ninomiya could only open his buttocks every time he fell on it, massaging them tenderly. Then, his eyes looked up to discover a man who was arching his back harshly, leaving a great chance for the boss to attack his neck. And he did it. His lips sucked his skin mercilessly. He did not care. Ninomiya was so sorry for how selfish he was, but he needed to prove Ohno was his in some way. Of course, the employee caught his hair to stop him, however Kazunari could feel that indeed it was an empty complain. How could Satoshi stop him if even he himself did want that hickey so badly? That was how Kazunari felt it, so that he continued but near his collarbone, like that he would have it, being easier to hide it at the same time.
Hastily, the boss heard a noise somewhere and he looked up, straight at the door thinking that someone was there, but he found no one. Even if his eyebrows were frowning because he heard the sound clearly, there was no way to be figured out if he saw no one. “Don’t worry, sometimes there are noises by the neighbours” Ohno explained between moans. Kazunari raised his gaze, showing a shy smile as reply and Satoshi just kissed him softly, making their tongues meet sometimes. He still tasted like alcohol, but it was sweet, so he wanted to keep on relishing it. Slowly. Deeply. Endlessly.
“Are you already?” Ninomiya questioned when his finger did some circles on the tip and it was stained a bit. The employee seemed troubled and embarrassed as his head nodded. “C’mon, keep your butt up” suddenly, he ordered and even if Satoshi put a curious face, he did it. Without a doubt, Kazunari's answer was moving his hips hastily. Faster than how he had done it and deeper. Being taken aback, Ohno leaned his forearms on his shoulders and on the couch to arch his back and moan loudly. Meanwhile, Ninomiya could only gulp and close his eyes before placing his head on the soft furniture as his mouth gasped heavily. All he could feel from that moment on was something hot falling on his belly, loud moans accompanied by his shouted name and two arms hugging his neck tightly when his hips still moved at a great speed because his body needed to release that tension as nothing else. After that, it was like all his senses died for a few seconds, losing the track of time and forgetting his relationship with Ohno to only leave tender kisses on his shoulder.
Possibly a few minutes after, Kazunari knew Satoshi had fallen asleep on his arms, without moving a single part of his body. “Embrace my neck tightly, boy” Ninomiya whispered although he thought he would not hear him. Surprisingly, Ohno tightened his grip and cuddled up more in his arms. Following his plan, the boss stood up while catching him strongly and started to wander around the house, attempting to find his bedroom. When he reached it, Satoshi was left on the bed. Before covering him, he decided to clean him up a bit not to stain the sheets too much and dress him up at least with an underwear and a T-shirt. Also, as Ohno was truly drunk, it would be impossible to wake him up until tomorrow. So when he was ready to get in the bed, Ninomiya kissed his hair and raised a bit more the blanket so he would not be cold.
“Good night, Satoshi” his voice was a mutter not to be noticed, otherwise Ohno would persuade him to sleep there over and over again. So that right after finishing, Kazunari got out of the bedroom. The last thing he did in that house was dressing up and exiting it. He would have to walk for a while due to the lack of trains at that hour, however he did not mind. It had been worth it. Besides, it would help him to think about him. About what he wanted and what he did not.
At that moment, he was regretting not having stayed in that bed, beside him, hugging that small body and protecting that scared soul. Then, why had he not done it? Maybe that bed was not the indicated one to share between them, maybe his consciousness was too hard to allow that, maybe… Maybe Kazunari only wanted to spend time with Ohno when their minds were not disturbing them with regrets and guilt. Perhaps all he desired was a proper relationship with Ohno because after all the feelings inside his heart were not unimportant already. He laughed. Had he truly fallen in love with Satoshi? Was he craving for being his boyfriend? For waking up beside him every morning or receiving a kiss every night…
Everything is your stupid fault, Ohno Satoshi...
If that man had not crashed against him that night… If that man had not answered him so egocentric in his office that morning… If that man had not looked as bothered as a kid that night… If that man had not been that handsome while drawing as that morning… If that man had not… appeared in his life… If Ohno did not exist… If they had never met… What would have happened to him then? What would have he lived instead of that impossible love story? What would have he experienced instead?
Why am I so afraid of the next day if you aren't with me?
Tears started to fall finally after so much time being there, so hidden in his soul. His hands only dried the first ones, because when he realized he would not stop that easily, he gave up and cried alone in that dark street without control.
Should I confess my feelings to you, Satoshi? What would you answer?
//It's a bit late for the chapter but it's still Friday in Spain so I'm in time xDD I was busy posting the Anishi so I couldn't post the chapter before or reply the comments of the last one! Don't worry that I will do tomorrow~
Also SURPRISE! This chapter is Nino-centric! I loved this chapter a lot because it makes me cry especially in the last part. A lot of things happen and even if it doesn't seem as such, you will understand!
Hope you liked it and thanks for all the support!!
Pairing:: Ohno Satoshi/OC, Ohno Satoshi/Ninomiya Kazunari
Genre:: angst, romance, drama, office!au
Length:: chaptered
Word Count:: 7157 words
Rating:: NC-17
Feeling his throat so dry, he wanted to cough, but just swallowed a bit of saliva instead to see if it stopped because he did not want to wake up that man who was completely grabbed to his neck and torso. His eyes gazed at his messy hair falling, perfect to brush, or his thin, lower lip, perfect to kiss. His chin was pouting even while he was asleep, so Ninomiya could not handle his smile. That man… He had never found such a creature. For the boss, Ohno was the model employee, always working, standing out, helping everyone, admired by his bosses. However, under that perfect face, there was a moody man, who was usually complaining about everything, showing a rude face and disliking everything which could bother him. And much deeper than all of that, he was lucky to find a warm man. Someone who was able to give anything for the ones he loved, someone who was there every time he needed help, someone who needed to be loved because he was cuddly and affectionate. What Kazunari liked the most was how rude he could seem, but after all, when the truth was revealed, Ohno was just shy. How his fluffy cheeks started to be reddish and the sweat fell through his temples.
Ninomiya sighed while biting his lip not to smile that widely. He truly liked that man beside him. He was truly into him. So much he was crazy even to do that with Satoshi being married. He never thought he would be able to interfere in a marriage like that. But when Satoshi was near, his body felt so reckless. It moved by itself, always searching for a way to erase every armour and find out the real Satoshi. Just who he was naturally. So when he discovered it once, Kazunari became addicted to that face of his, ending up always attempting to get it no matter what, where or how. His whole being yearned for him. And he could realize it in his last trip. Being apart from him had hurt him more than he expected. Kazunari thought it was going to be harder because his body would tend to feel hot with Ohno, but when he noticed it was not that, but that he was missing as crazy his hugs or his kisses, even his complains, pouts or smiles, Ninomiya knew something was wrong there. That was the reason why he had never had a proper, stable relationship with anyone. Because he was unable to feel something strong in his heart. However, with Satoshi, it happened so easily, no matter how he tried to stop his feelings, that somehow he was being a mess of what he could do. Of course, Satoshi had his life done. A wife, a house, a job. He was only his toy. Although he was horribly into his employee, there was no way Ohno would choose him in the end. No way he would feel the same. And he was scared of what he would do when that moment would arrive. Would he be again as lonely as before? He had Sho and Masaki, but how warm his heart was with Ohno… Nobody had gotten such a thing before.
Feeling again that burning pain into his chest, he decided to move him slowly to drop Ohno on his bed and cover him a bit more. Both were naked and even if it was hot, he did not want his employee to fall ill. So not caring about how Satoshi could complain even asleep, his hands raised the blanket until his armpits. One of them brushed his hair softly. He was so naïve and unprotected… Ninomiya felt a hole inside of him when he thought he was not going to be the person who would take care of him in the future. He was not going to be the one who would love him or who would spend the days with. He was not going to be chosen by Ohno.
With watery eyes, he stood up in the middle of the night to dress some clothes and went to the kitchen. He caught a glass of water to drink and see if that knot in his throat would disappear. Meanwhile, he checked his phone and Sho had written to him. It was four am, the message was sent at one am. He prayed his reply would not disturb him.
From:: Sakurai Sho
Hi, bro. I'm sorry if I sounded so bothered today, but really, meeting your mistress wasn't nice. You know I don't support it, he's married, don't you see how troublesome that may be for you? Your life has already had so many scandals so try to think a bit about yourself. I hate doing this, but even if that man seems a nice person, it's impossible, Nino. Reconsider it, please.
From:: Ninomiya Kazunari
First, don't call him my mistress, he's more important than that. Second, it's worse for me if I let him go. Third, I don't care about scandals, I just want to finally be happy with someone and you know it. And fourth, I won't reconsider it. I'm sorry, Sho. I won't give up unless he is the one who breaks ties with me. It's already decided.
Ninomiya wrote that feeling even sicker. All of that was overcoming him. Better said, those feelings. Those feelings regarding Ohno which were killing him everyday. A really small part of himself was hating it so much, it was hating the fact of possibly falling in love with his employee. There were so many obstacles that his mind was wondering why his heart continued to fall in his claws. It wondered what Ohno had that made him be unable to stop following him anywhere constantly. Ninomiya needed to know why. Why a married man? Or maybe, what fit better his feelings. Why did Ohno have to be married? Because after all, he did not want any other man in his life; the biggest obstacle was that marriage. That corrupt marriage they had. His wife was possibly cheating on him and Ohno did nothing. Why? If he could get divorced, Ninomiya would be able to try it, so why did Satoshi stay still? Every night sleeping by her side, living with her, sharing the same stuff… Perhaps even kissing every morning… Smiling at her… Making love to her…
Kazunari breathed deeply, trying not to sob and throw the glass against the wall. That anger inside of him, that jealousy, that pain. All of that was being a hell for him. Seeing how such a woman was getting the affection of Ohno made him be sick. She deserved the worst, or at least she did not deserve someone as Satoshi by her side. Satoshi did not deserve being treated like that, being cheated, being humiliated by the person who swore eternal love to him. No, and he would not allow it. Kazunari was sure of helping him to open his eyes and forget her. He would give his best to protect him no matter what, against the whole world if it was needed.
Being already so tired and even cold, Kazunari returned to the bed silently to sit down on his side to try to lie down, finding that Ohno was in the middle of it and he was unable to. Kazunari rolled his eyes and moved him a bit at least to place him over his body. As expected, the employee growled disturbed and hid his face on his neck. “Where did you go?” suddenly, he asked between babblings. The boss brushed his hair to make him relax.
“I was just thirsty. Sleep, Satoshi” his voice was tender not to wake him up more. The man over him moved like cuddling up and kissed his neck.
“What time is it?” his lips touched slightly his skin while talking and Kazunari felt a hard shiver. Even half asleep, he found different ways to provoke him. The boss sighed wondering why was he asking that.
“Four am, that's why-“
“Happy birthday, Kazunari…” he cut off his words to say that, that small phrase which made Ninomiya's heart pound as crazy. If it continued like that, Satoshi would discover it because his hand was over his torso, so near his heart.
“Thank you…” his lips muttered while his eyes were observing the ceiling. His arms hugged him tightly, trying not to lose him. Could he control that? Could he make him stay? What would he do without him? Once he already tasted the flavour happiness had when he was with Ohno, his whole being refused to lose it. He refused to give up that easily when it was the first time he felt something as pure as that inside of his chest.
You will be mine someday…
*****
It was normal for him to wake up before that man, who loved sleeping. So he opted to do breakfast. His hands covered more that naked piece of art and he went to the kitchen. Indeed he had nothing to eat properly, just those typical packets of coffee. How did Ohno like being with him if he was such a mess? He doubted if he should go out and buy something, possibly his employee would be truly hungry. After all, last night, Kazunari had really gotten him so tired. The boss showed a naughty smile; he loved remembering how Ohno looked up at him and asked more. How his mouth was half-opened because he wanted a kiss. How his legs were wrapped around his hips to deepen it. How he could feel his desire, the desire of wanting more and more, of wanting Ninomiya no matter what. Why though?
The boss had never felt handsome or cool. What was more, when he was a kid, he was a geek of games and manga. That changed because that was not proper of the CEO's son. Everything was because he was the son of... He sighed, leaning his hands on the worktop. That was still too recent. He should continue to do their breakfast instead of thinking awful memories again. That was why he started to prepare two coffees in silence. He planned to carry them to the bedroom and wake him up. However surprising him a lot, when he turned around with both cups in his hands, his eyes met Ohno's, which looked at the coffees with a smile. So that made him happy. Ninomiya could not help but notice how he was dressed up. Just his boxers and shirt. That was so provocative. So much he gulped not to throw himself to devour that man all the times he wanted and stretched his arm to give him his cup. Satoshi muttered a thank you and drank a bit of it. They kept on drinking it there, without talking and being completely okay with it. Sometimes, Ninomiya stared at him too long and when Ohno noticed him, he laughed cutely. The boss could not assure his face was not red because it was embarrassing, being caught like a teenager observing his partner. Slowly, Satoshi left the cup in the sink and even if there was still some coffee in his, Kazunari could not wait anymore. His hand searched for that waist to approach their bodies and rub their noses.
“Let's take a shower together” he proposed and Satoshi smiled interested in it. He nodded and Kazunari smiled widely. He was truly happy to be able to do that. Then, the boss went to prepare a few towels while seeing Ohno was checking his phone. He wondered if he was answering Matsumoto... Yesterday's messages reflected how good friends they had become and he was wondering if that was a good idea. After all, Jun was the man who threatened Ohno. However, he wanted to control himself and give him space, that was why he went to the bathroom to get it ready. Shortly after, his employee appeared with a moody expression and Kazunari could not help but frown wondering if something bad had happened. Even like that, Satoshi only undressed and placed himself under the water. He watched how affected he was but he had no idea by what. Slowly, he ended up naked and joined the shower. Cuddly, he hugged his waist by behind. However, he felt him so cold. Why? What had happened?
Satoshi turned around with his wet face and not because of the water falling. Kazunari got so worried and caught his cheeks. “What's wrong? Tell me, Satoshi” he spoke showing his concern the best he could. Ohno's answer was his lip being bitten. It seemed like he did not want to say it. Should he leave it like that? No, he did not think so. That was why, he kissed his lips as tender as he could. “Tell me, please” he insisted, possibly forcing Ohno to do it.
“My wife will spend two days in a trip with a friend” abruptly he smiled. “Do you know how many times I've asked her for a trip and she has always refused it?” his lip was almost bleeding if he did not stop. Kazunari kissed him to save it and be close to him. He did not know who was angrier, if Ohno himself or Ninomiya. Just watching how he was suffering ripped his heart out of his chest. That woman was destroying him and even if Ninomiya hated admitting it, he could say Ohno truly loved her or at least he had loved her. Maybe that was what bothered him the most.
How can you still love her, Satoshi?
Slowly, his hand brushed his wet hair to place it backwards and approached his chin to his shoulder. Without a doubt, two arms hugged his torso tightly. They both were naked under a cascade of hot water, but the only thing he felt was how he was shivering. Could that be... rage? “I can take you on a trip wherever you want. You don't need her” his words were harsh, perhaps he said too much. Perhaps it was too early to treat like that his marriage. He had no right to talk about it, much less deciding what to do. With hesitation, he looked back at Ohno when the latter raised his head like a puppy.
“It's not that, but thank you” his voice tried to sound as sweet as possible accompanied with a tired smile, but Ninomiya could see how hurt he was lately regarding his wife. He acted like he did not care, however he behaved like this again. Which were his true feelings?
“I know it's not the fact of just a trip. But then, what is?” he asked and decided to take the shower meanwhile. His hands were filled with soap to rub Satoshi's skin slowly. His torso and shoulders at a low speed, waiting to hear his answer. Abruptly, his employee took his hands to stop him.
“I can do it” his cheeks were flushed and the boss understood he was just being shy. His heart pounded hard inside his chest by that soft expression. So because of that, he smiled to kiss his right commissure and continue after.
“Let me take care of you. Just say all that it's bothering you meanwhile” he attempted to be as tender as possible so Satoshi would feel the most cared person of that world. That was how he wanted to treat him the rest of his life. That was how he wanted Ohno to be treated. And the latter only placed his forehead on his shoulder, allowing him to continue to clean his body.
“Do you remember the first day of your trip when you called me? I met Jun” he started to tell him, but the first part was already disturbing him horribly. So indeed they met to drink after work. He could not avoid being jealous. “He told me that when my wife and I were in the university, therefore we were just lovers, she cheated on me with him” he spoke lowly, maybe trying not to be heard with the water noise. But unluckily, Ninomiya caught each word perfectly and his anger grew up in seconds. “The best was that he didn’t know she was with me. So she ended up cheating on both at the same time” he laughed tiredly. The boss stopped his hands to wash them and made him raise his head. Indeed, he was crying. All that woman did was a lie. They already had the proof of it.
“Why are you still with her?” he asked without hesitation. She had already showed how despicable and horrible person she was so why Satoshi was still by her side. It was unthinkable for him. Maybe, indeed he was right. Maybe Ohno would choose her before him.
“It's not easy. I'm someone who everyone admires, who seems as having the perfect life, who has everything he wants. So losing all of that suddenly it’s... Scary. And so hard” his eyes looked up, looked at him with a fear, with a scare that Ninomiya had not seen before in the eyes of anyone. Was he that scared? Was his life that scary? How could he help him? How could he make it stop scaring him? How could he set Ohno free from the claws of that woman? He needed to know to save him. Ninomiya wanted to save him from that constant unhappiness no matter what. So where could he find the answers? What could he do? Was he that useless? Being there, in front of him, unable to do a single step to comfort him. Finally, Kazunari only surrounded that tiny body with his muscled arms to protect him. To protect that soul he was showing in that shower. Being completely naked, both his body and soul. That was why his grip became tighter.
“I won't let anything bad happen to you. I promise” he muttered, maybe undressing his soul shyly too. With Satoshi it was okay. For sure it was okay when his employee only hugged him back even tighter. His warmth was everything he needed to be alright.
*****
Why had he accepted? After all, he was better surrounded by papers and numbers instead of drunk people, who were his employees. It was his birthday, he should be happy his people wanted to celebrate it with him, but somehow he was not the type of person who enjoyed such a thing. That was why after that hard day regarding Satoshi, his feelings and the work, that party was becoming something hard to handle instead of joy and fun. Luckily, in that party, Ohno was there, at the other side of the long table though, beside Jun also, but he was there at least and just admiring him from time to time was okay.
His hand was only grabbing a beer, which was half full because it was not like his body accepted too well the alcohol. Anything he drank could affect him the double or triple, so there was no doubt he had to be careful or he would end up being drunk and doing who knew what... The whole party, then, was focused on contemplating his boy. That cute man with red cheeks and sleepy eyes. He spent too much time that it was normal if Satoshi found him several times; the boss only continued without caring while his employee was flushed by embarrassment instead of by alcohol and that made the boss desire him even harder. Why was he suffering that much? He would love to take him home and make love to him as many times as possible, all his body could bear. Because indeed, he was mesmerized by such creature.
Not being taken aback, once of the times he was figured out by Ohno, the latter stood up to surround all his coworkers difficultly, leaving Jun behind, who looked speechless. Slowly, his employee approached him to lean on his shoulder and sit down beside the boss. Ninomiya glanced at the rest of people there, who were drunk also, but looking at Satoshi weirdly. He knew that his employee would not have taken that risk publicly. “How much have you drunk?” his mouth talked to Ohno, but he still did like they were not. The other man only chuckled effortlessly.
“You should know it after looking at me the whole evening” he spoke slowly, as his tongue could not move properly. Then, Kazunari noticed a person glancing at them while frowning. Suddenly, Ohno leaned his head on his shoulder, producing a small heart attack on the boss. He blinked several times, not knowing what to do; everyone there were widening their eyes without hesitation. Luckily, Jun appeared quickly to remove the almost-asleep Ohno from Ninomiya's side and apologize just to show that Satoshi was being so out of place without reason. Somehow, Kazunari thanked him mentally, but in the other hand, he wanted to be like that in public. Having him in his arms. Kissing him in the street. Holding hands as something normal. That was why he looked so disappointed when Ohno leaned his head on Jun's shoulder. Jealous. Disturbed. It was not because he did not trust his friend, but because with Jun, Satoshi could do whatever he wanted, however with him, Satoshi could only act as an employee. And he hated being just a boss for him in public. With all his might.
Being already too moody like to enjoy his own party, he glanced at Jun and moved his head to indicate him to follow the same path. Ninomiya stood up and went to the toilets; at the next minute, Matsumoto was coming inside. That situation was quite uncomfortable, so he tried to end it as fast as he could. “I will take Ohno home, just help him to go outside that I will be there waiting for him” his words were authoritarian, possibly still doing as a boss. He did not expect an answer back, that was why he was going to exit the toilets when a hand caught his arm.
“What are you trying with him?” Matsumoto's voice was deep. Kazunari frowned, not knowing such a docile worker could have that face. He turned around and found a serious man. Somehow, his appearance had a respectful aura.
“It’s not your business” he answered, not caring about how intimidating he could seem. Ninomiya was already used to handle with that type of attitude.
“It is, because I care about him” Jun spoke straight after his reply and the boss raised his right commissure to show the attempt of a smirk.
“Then, answer me and I will answer you. Why are you his friend?” he planned at the next instant, knowing that he would fall in his claws if he wanted his thoughts aloud. The worker looked troubled, but opened his mouth ready to talk.
“At first, it was because he asked, better said, obligated me to be his friend while being drunk. But he's a wonderful person, who doesn't deserve having such a wife, that's why I ask you which your intentions are” he told the boss not looking too sure, that indecision was reflected into his eyes. Kazunari raised one eyebrow. Had Satoshi asked him to be his friend? How odd could it be?
“Don’t take me as someone who likes breaking marriages. He's special” his explanation was brief, not giving details so he would not know too much, even if he was finding out Ohno and Jun were closer than he expected.
“I just hope you will make him open his eyes” suddenly, he said such a thing and made Ninomiya frown. “I will carry him outside, wait for us” without waiting for his answer, Jun continued talking and after leaving the boss trying to understand what he meant, the coworker exited the toilets. What did he mean? What did he want to say in reality? Did he have to read between lines? Did Jun accept their affair? Did Jun want him to stop that marriage? Why? Was Satoshi so unhappy like to have friends who would think cheating on his wife was a correct idea?
Ninomiya left the toilets to approach his employees, glancing at Ohno being caught by Jun, and he spoke. “Everyone, thank you so much for this celebration, I had a lot of fun. But unluckily I have to leave because I still have so much work undone. Continue enjoying the night for me” he said goodbye to everyone there and they complained a bit, but said goodbye to him too. Meanwhile, he was taking his jacket and briefcase to leave and his eyes were watching how Jun apologized by Satoshi's behaviour.
“Now that Ninomiya boss will leave, I think Ohno needs to sleep, see you tomorrow guys” Kazunari heard how the friend talked with the rest of people before he left the Remedy's and waited beside the building. He would take Ohno's car and would go to his house. He needed to rest no matter what, how could he be so stupid like to drink that much? Suddenly, he listened to small complains and mumbles. Then, Matsumoto appeared dragging Satoshi tiredly. He seemed a kid.
Ninomiya approached to grab Ohno. “C’mon, Satoshi, let's go home” his arms embraced his waist and the employee smiled when he could wrap his neck.
“Sleep with me” Ohno asked with a weak smile, being so cuddly and close to Ninomiya that the latter was glancing at Jun, who was so out of place there.
“First, let's arrive home” he tried to convince him to start to walk, but unexpectedly, Satoshi kissed him without a doubt. In the middle of the street. In other circumstances, he would have loved that public display of affection, but he was just panicking, stopping him in any way, looking around with a heart attack. Luckily, he only found an amazed Jun observing them.
“Please, I don't want to sleep alone” Ohno continued like nothing bad had happened, flirting as just a few times Kazunari saw him and he decided that Satoshi being drunk was so dangerous to control.
“Tell me where your car is and give me the keys” the boss opted to keep on his attempts to go home instead of scolding him and worsening everything. With a pout, Ohno looked down to start to touch his pockets. At last, he got the keys, but his hand hid them.
“First, a kiss” he played cuddly. The boss was already losing the hope of not being discovered. His gaze checked the street quickly, watching how Jun had his mouth half-opened and he fulfilled his wish. His lips kissed Satoshi's for two seconds, closing his eyes and embracing him tighter.
“Happier? Now, behave and let me take you home” he reproached him with husky voice and Satoshi gave him the keys to be willing to walk. Before following him, he turned around to thank Jun and the latter bowed at him back.
Figuring out how hard walking with Ohno was, he just prayed the car was near. Luckily, when they turned the corner of the next building, they found the car and Kazunari sighed relieved, soon they would be able to rest. That was why he placed Satoshi on the copilot seat and he sat beside him. Just when he was inserting the key to turn it on, a sudden image appeared in his mind. How another car crashed against his. He gulped, trying not to panic, but his body was already sweaty and trembling. There was no way he could allow that at that moment, no one else could drive. He had to. Nothing bad would happen, not that again. It was true he had drunk as that night, that he was driving as that night, that he was not alone in the car as that night, that it had happened exactly one year ago, the night of his birthday. However, he knew it would be okay.
“Kazunari, why aren't you driving?” he asked half asleep already.
“I was just thinking about where your house was” he lied. He could not know about that, the reason why he stopped driving. Why he could not drive a car again. That was why, he breathed deeply and moved the car slowly. It would not happen. Not again. He would not let Satoshi end as Masaki. It was impossible. He would drive slowly, carefully, looking everything. They would arrive safely. He had to trust himself.
“You know? It's so nice when you drive. You do it so well…” Satoshi commented with a smile while observing him. Ninomiya smiled at him back and that helped him to relax. He was okay by his side. He could overcome that panic. So when he realized it, they were arriving and he sighed relieved. So much he had his eyes watery. When would he be able to accept what happened that night?
Slowly, he tried to get Ohno out of the car without hitting him anywhere and he was already so tired of walking that irregular that, knowing there was no one in his house, Ninomiya grabbed his butt. “Jump” and Satoshi wrapped his legs around his hips to be carried inside the house. Being still so playful, the boss began to feel kisses on his neck.
“Take me to the bed and fuck me” he muttered beside his ear. He would not do that, he had already too much knowing he was having an affair with a married man like to even do it in the bed where his wife and he slept together. He hated his wife indeed, but his values were not that despicable and inhumane.
“No, you will sleep” the boss rejected the idea, but Satoshi did not like it.
“I need you… Please” Ohno bit his lobe and seduced him so badly. Ninomiya was already feeling a heat inside of him which was fighting against his rational side. He stopped in the middle of the hallway to look at Satoshi, who caressed his cheek and kissed his lips softly. Why was he handling his desire like that? Why was he caring too much about his marriage? Indeed, he could not be that selfish, because after all he knew he was ruining his life. Ohno would be the man who cheated on his wife and he would be the man who broke a couple. He wondered why it had to be like that. Why if he was just loving a man.
“Okay” he changed his path to the living room, dropping Satoshi on the sofa, realizing how perfect he was. How his jacket was a mess, how his shirt was half opened, how his tie was untied, how his feet were already removing his shoes. His eyes were showing how the employee was waiting for him to possess him once again. To surround his being and heal it from the pain. So Ninomiya removed his jacket and shirt to kneel on the sofa and unbutton Ohno's. His lips searched for his skin to taste, feeling it better than the alcohol itself. He would love to leave a mark on his neck, show his love, his property. But of course he could not, because Satoshi was not his.
Suddenly, he heard a loud moan and realized he had bitten one of his nipples too hard when his feelings filled his being. His lips kissed it as an apology and his hands began to work by themselves, removing every clothes they found touching any part of his body possibly, while he was kissing and licking his skin as if he had the best flavour of that world. When Ninomiya was in front of Ohno, his mind was null and the beast inside of him got out to admire who he was able to. That man who was able to drive him crazy just with a smile. Who was able to make his heart soften with just a caress. Who was able to cheer him up with his pouts. He wondered what he was feeling inside him. That pressure, which became pain, which squeezed his stomach, which provoked his throat had a knot in the middle, which ended up being horrible when he was alone and his mind could not stop thinking about him. Why was that provoked thanks to Ohno's presence?
Everything is your fault…
He thought while smelling his neck, feeling two arms around his neck and a weak creature gasping powerlessly. Why was he so mesmerized by Ohno? Why could he affect the boss like that? Why was his heart falling in his trap so carelessly? As if it did not mind the fact he was married and that was just an affair which would last a few months, if he was able to believe he was important for Satoshi for only those few months, he would keep on accepting it. No mattering his feelings, no mattering how his chest ached. Ninomiya would love to whisper beside his ear if it was okay to fall in love with him, and actually he could because Satoshi was truly drunk and excited like to understand and remember it. However, the boss was unable to say such a sentence. Mostly because he already knew the answer.
“Kazunari… You're taking so long…” Ohno complained with that cute pout of his and his eyes half-opened and teary. His hand brushed his hair to uncover his forehead so that his lips were able to leave a soft kiss on it.
“My boy is truly impatient…” he muttered with a smile. When he gazed at his employee after such an action, Ohno was looking away, totally flushed and tense. What a good reaction… Kazunari would pay millions to live that moment over and over again. How it was the perfect timing to bite his lobe and spoke. “Ride me then” his smirk was evident, his teeth catching his lower lip lustily. He wanted to see how Satoshi could move, how he could control him. For first time, Ninomiya would allow him to take over and possess his body all he wanted and craved for.
That was why, even not having Ohno's answer, just an amazed pair of eyes and the obvious excitement fulfilling his body were enough for Kazunari to stand up and stretch a hand. His employee sat and took it hesitantly. Then, when they both were face to face, the boss noticing how Ohno was in need of touches, finally his hands released it as big as just a few times of his life. The trousers and underwear fell alone and his feet finished the job. At that moment, being in the same condition as Ohno, he only stared at him, waiting to see how much he could handle the desire in him. After a few seconds, indeed he started to look troubled, like wondering why Ninomiya was still. So slowly, the employee approached, putting his two hands on his waist, to kiss his lips softly. This was his real scent, no matter how hard he could do it, Ohno was sweet, so sweet even sugar could not win him. And probably, Kazunari loved it too much that was why he needed to make love to him without stop. Because when he wanted to just fulfil their words and what they had called to themselves, he was not able to treat Satoshi as just someone to fuck and forget after. He would love it, but unluckily his fate was not that.
“Sit down and I will ride you…” suddenly, that shy man spoke in front of him and Ninomiya showed a serious grimace. He could not pretend to be what he was not. He could not pretend to use Ohno for having a good fuck. He could not mostly because when he sat and Satoshi placed himself over his thighs, his eyes just admired how wonderful he was. Because when he was waiting just the start of it, he employee decided to caress his face and kiss his neck. Because when he noticed he yearned for that for the rest of his life, his gaze became watery. Something inside of him was hating the possibility of having such the bad luck of falling in love with a married man, but when his arms hugged his torso tightly and his body felt his warmth, the fear of that being the reality disappeared, his mind only imagining how beautiful that moment was being. And thanks to that, he was able to breathe deeply and focus on only that man, and nothing else than that man.
Slowly, he realized how impossible thinking was when Satoshi went down for first time while leaning on his shoulders. If his brain was working, it was only to understand the gorgeousness of that God over him. And more when he only had to be still and watch how Ohno moved up and down at a slow speed, moaning breathlessly. Ninomiya could only open his buttocks every time he fell on it, massaging them tenderly. Then, his eyes looked up to discover a man who was arching his back harshly, leaving a great chance for the boss to attack his neck. And he did it. His lips sucked his skin mercilessly. He did not care. Ninomiya was so sorry for how selfish he was, but he needed to prove Ohno was his in some way. Of course, the employee caught his hair to stop him, however Kazunari could feel that indeed it was an empty complain. How could Satoshi stop him if even he himself did want that hickey so badly? That was how Kazunari felt it, so that he continued but near his collarbone, like that he would have it, being easier to hide it at the same time.
Hastily, the boss heard a noise somewhere and he looked up, straight at the door thinking that someone was there, but he found no one. Even if his eyebrows were frowning because he heard the sound clearly, there was no way to be figured out if he saw no one. “Don’t worry, sometimes there are noises by the neighbours” Ohno explained between moans. Kazunari raised his gaze, showing a shy smile as reply and Satoshi just kissed him softly, making their tongues meet sometimes. He still tasted like alcohol, but it was sweet, so he wanted to keep on relishing it. Slowly. Deeply. Endlessly.
“Are you already?” Ninomiya questioned when his finger did some circles on the tip and it was stained a bit. The employee seemed troubled and embarrassed as his head nodded. “C’mon, keep your butt up” suddenly, he ordered and even if Satoshi put a curious face, he did it. Without a doubt, Kazunari's answer was moving his hips hastily. Faster than how he had done it and deeper. Being taken aback, Ohno leaned his forearms on his shoulders and on the couch to arch his back and moan loudly. Meanwhile, Ninomiya could only gulp and close his eyes before placing his head on the soft furniture as his mouth gasped heavily. All he could feel from that moment on was something hot falling on his belly, loud moans accompanied by his shouted name and two arms hugging his neck tightly when his hips still moved at a great speed because his body needed to release that tension as nothing else. After that, it was like all his senses died for a few seconds, losing the track of time and forgetting his relationship with Ohno to only leave tender kisses on his shoulder.
Possibly a few minutes after, Kazunari knew Satoshi had fallen asleep on his arms, without moving a single part of his body. “Embrace my neck tightly, boy” Ninomiya whispered although he thought he would not hear him. Surprisingly, Ohno tightened his grip and cuddled up more in his arms. Following his plan, the boss stood up while catching him strongly and started to wander around the house, attempting to find his bedroom. When he reached it, Satoshi was left on the bed. Before covering him, he decided to clean him up a bit not to stain the sheets too much and dress him up at least with an underwear and a T-shirt. Also, as Ohno was truly drunk, it would be impossible to wake him up until tomorrow. So when he was ready to get in the bed, Ninomiya kissed his hair and raised a bit more the blanket so he would not be cold.
“Good night, Satoshi” his voice was a mutter not to be noticed, otherwise Ohno would persuade him to sleep there over and over again. So that right after finishing, Kazunari got out of the bedroom. The last thing he did in that house was dressing up and exiting it. He would have to walk for a while due to the lack of trains at that hour, however he did not mind. It had been worth it. Besides, it would help him to think about him. About what he wanted and what he did not.
At that moment, he was regretting not having stayed in that bed, beside him, hugging that small body and protecting that scared soul. Then, why had he not done it? Maybe that bed was not the indicated one to share between them, maybe his consciousness was too hard to allow that, maybe… Maybe Kazunari only wanted to spend time with Ohno when their minds were not disturbing them with regrets and guilt. Perhaps all he desired was a proper relationship with Ohno because after all the feelings inside his heart were not unimportant already. He laughed. Had he truly fallen in love with Satoshi? Was he craving for being his boyfriend? For waking up beside him every morning or receiving a kiss every night…
Everything is your stupid fault, Ohno Satoshi...
If that man had not crashed against him that night… If that man had not answered him so egocentric in his office that morning… If that man had not looked as bothered as a kid that night… If that man had not been that handsome while drawing as that morning… If that man had not… appeared in his life… If Ohno did not exist… If they had never met… What would have happened to him then? What would have he lived instead of that impossible love story? What would have he experienced instead?
Why am I so afraid of the next day if you aren't with me?
Tears started to fall finally after so much time being there, so hidden in his soul. His hands only dried the first ones, because when he realized he would not stop that easily, he gave up and cried alone in that dark street without control.
Should I confess my feelings to you, Satoshi? What would you answer?
//It's a bit late for the chapter but it's still Friday in Spain so I'm in time xDD I was busy posting the Anishi so I couldn't post the chapter before or reply the comments of the last one! Don't worry that I will do tomorrow~
Also SURPRISE! This chapter is Nino-centric! I loved this chapter a lot because it makes me cry especially in the last part. A lot of things happen and even if it doesn't seem as such, you will understand!
Hope you liked it and thanks for all the support!!