I saw juan and steven in the same night.. sound intresting??
Dude, tonight was crazy... My life.. i hate it so much right now.I hung out with steven tonight and that was awesome,hes such a great person, from what i see i guess.We hung outside mostly and it was hella cold omg.I met a few of his friends which seemed pretty nice, and absolutely funny as my friends are as well so i felt kind of comfortable.....
Then juan picked me up from my cousins, it went ok, no fighting or anything but it hurt soo much to be around him because i still care for him even though he pisses me off sometimes i mean like i said he was such a great boyfriend i didnt give him enough credit.But when we were at darrells tonight and i layed on darrells futon and layed my legs across juan while he played a video game and i tried to sleep,something was said i dont remeber but he gave me a hug and it felt soooo familiar,so comforting, so loving and even for that split second i hated myself for what i had fucked up and it hurts so fucking bad that i cant even explain the emotions i have right now.I have such a bad headach because of all the stress and shit dude... ugh...blahh i wish i could just focus on my own life, but for the past 2 months ive been focuseing my world around juans world, and now i dont even know who i am, not that i dont ever think i knew who i was.I need to change alot of shit about myself and the way i act,i wish i had someone to be there to help me ya know.Im losing alot of my friends,gaining knew ones but they dont really know alot about mypast and stuff so its not like yah i understand you raquel bla bla bla... ok... well i have to go now..
ttyl
Then juan picked me up from my cousins, it went ok, no fighting or anything but it hurt soo much to be around him because i still care for him even though he pisses me off sometimes i mean like i said he was such a great boyfriend i didnt give him enough credit.But when we were at darrells tonight and i layed on darrells futon and layed my legs across juan while he played a video game and i tried to sleep,something was said i dont remeber but he gave me a hug and it felt soooo familiar,so comforting, so loving and even for that split second i hated myself for what i had fucked up and it hurts so fucking bad that i cant even explain the emotions i have right now.I have such a bad headach because of all the stress and shit dude... ugh...blahh i wish i could just focus on my own life, but for the past 2 months ive been focuseing my world around juans world, and now i dont even know who i am, not that i dont ever think i knew who i was.I need to change alot of shit about myself and the way i act,i wish i had someone to be there to help me ya know.Im losing alot of my friends,gaining knew ones but they dont really know alot about mypast and stuff so its not like yah i understand you raquel bla bla bla... ok... well i have to go now..
ttyl