(no subject)
My ex once told me that "the people closest to you, hurt you the most" (something like that kind of saying). It's very true, common and logical in most cases. Well, in this case, I hate to say that my mother is. I really don't know what to feel about her sometimes.... there are times when I see her happy, influential and motivating to me, but most of the time there's either pure hatred or disrespect towards her.
Why is this woman in my life? She was never a mentor to me or a true friend that I could talk to. There was never a true sign of affection given or much of a sympathy to help soothe my mind. The only true affection she has given me are banterings of failure, the past, and family secrets. I am seriously emotional tired from all this. I can never understand what my mother's motive are although she claim she knows. She wants a family reunited that has long been broken yet secretly bashes and put pity causes within.
The only people that has been for me are my friends... you guys are truly a family. I just hope that my mother would realize one day what she is really doing to me instead of putting causes of why she is the way she is. She has hurt me so much than anyone else I can think of or put together.
Why is this woman in my life? She was never a mentor to me or a true friend that I could talk to. There was never a true sign of affection given or much of a sympathy to help soothe my mind. The only true affection she has given me are banterings of failure, the past, and family secrets. I am seriously emotional tired from all this. I can never understand what my mother's motive are although she claim she knows. She wants a family reunited that has long been broken yet secretly bashes and put pity causes within.
The only people that has been for me are my friends... you guys are truly a family. I just hope that my mother would realize one day what she is really doing to me instead of putting causes of why she is the way she is. She has hurt me so much than anyone else I can think of or put together.