(no subject)
I haven't updated this thing in a while. I guess cause I use the myspace blog more often now. I guess this one is for more of my "privater" public thoughts. Privater...I love making up words. I should be sleeping now, but sleep doesn't come easy when you're on such a fucked up sleep schedule as I. I'll regret it in the morning.
I've been feeling quite comfortable with myself lately. And I think I'm on the verge of discovering myself more and more each day. It's not a good feeling, but it's liberating. It's like going through old picures of yourslef and just wondering what the hell possessed you to look like that. I'm really disappointed in the ways I've acted in the past. Embarassed is more like it. I sometimes cringe. I just had no idea what I was doing. I had no idea who I was and I guess I was too proud, too afraid to admit it. But I'm more confused about things, nowadays. Who knows. Some days I feel like I know exactly what I want, other days are quite the opposite.
It's like wanting the chance to just say something and when you have the mic you choke. All your time is devoted to wanting to say something, but you never think about what you want to say. What you could say or if you really want to say anything at all.
I'm always the one seeking. Never giving anyone the chance to find me.
Alisha
I've been feeling quite comfortable with myself lately. And I think I'm on the verge of discovering myself more and more each day. It's not a good feeling, but it's liberating. It's like going through old picures of yourslef and just wondering what the hell possessed you to look like that. I'm really disappointed in the ways I've acted in the past. Embarassed is more like it. I sometimes cringe. I just had no idea what I was doing. I had no idea who I was and I guess I was too proud, too afraid to admit it. But I'm more confused about things, nowadays. Who knows. Some days I feel like I know exactly what I want, other days are quite the opposite.
It's like wanting the chance to just say something and when you have the mic you choke. All your time is devoted to wanting to say something, but you never think about what you want to say. What you could say or if you really want to say anything at all.
I'm always the one seeking. Never giving anyone the chance to find me.
Alisha