I'm probably being a bit of a shit but...
I had agreed with my Mum that I'd come home over the next week so that she'd have me to help her shop and cook for Christmas. I told her that Sunday and Tuesday, I wouldn't be free due to other commitments, this was fine.
Anyway, she manages to come around today to telling me that she wants me to help her garden because my sister and my Mum want to spread some bark around this Saturday. This in itself isn't strenuous. Problem is, anything involving my Mum or my sister or both is something I tend to despise. This is because I do things in a way I consider efficient. On the other hand, my Mum and sister don't understand how to give clear directions or how to stick to them. This results in me constantly questioning and being given contradicting directions. What happens? I get pissed off and have a fight. I don't know why she is expecting me to do this bit of gardening. In the past and on the phone, I made it clear that I wasn't doing anything other than cooking and shopping. I wasn't going to do cleaning, or gardening or anything that was related to work because I wanted to rest whilst visiting and not have to do anything. My Mum got pissed off that I really didn't want to do this one day of gardening. This argument arose because I also suddenly remembered on the phone that I'd agreed with my housemate that this Saturday, we'd do some cleaning of our house before we disappeared for a our holidays. My Mum wasn't impressed that I wanted to go home to do some cleaning (about an hour or two max) instead of helping her garden. I emphasised that my younger sister was more than perfectly capable of doing it on her own (Mum can't, bad back). At any rate, if I wasn't coming over, my sister would be doing it anyway.
I've been mentally preparing myself for the ordeal of having to shop and cook with both my Mother and sister. I love these two activities, but not with either of them. I in fact hate doing it with either of them. I don't enjoy it because the way I like to do things is the polar opposite to the way that they do it.
This has resulted in me not being able to borrow the car for the next two weeks and only being allowed to come over on Christmas day at 2pm for lunch and not staying over. Since I don't have a car and it's a public holiday, public transport is most likely non-existent to the hugest pain in the arse that it's not worth bothering. Hence I'm spending Christmas alone.
Now I know I am being a bit of a shit. I am trying to put myself in my in my Mother's shoes, but clearly, she hasn't thought about my perspective.
Now other things I need to take into consideration:
-she's helped me move house
-she's bought me a microwave and blender/processor as housewarming gifts
-she's let me borrow the car when I needed to move house
-she's been good to me
Now you may ask, 'what is one day of gardening to put up with?' The thing is, I know by gut instinct that it won't stop at gardening even though she says it will. There'll be other little things that she'll want me to help out with. These things will chew up my holiday time. I ain't going to be wasting a shitload of annual leave fixing up the house.
It's not fair that she just expects that because I'm on holidays that I can just drop everything and waste my time doing something that I don't enjoy doing with them.
I want to rest during my holidays, not spend it working.
I hate having to deal with my mother and her inconsiderate way of thinking.
I need to sleep on this. Being tired and burnt out didn't exactly make me warm to her sudden presumption that I would help with this gardening.
Anyway, she manages to come around today to telling me that she wants me to help her garden because my sister and my Mum want to spread some bark around this Saturday. This in itself isn't strenuous. Problem is, anything involving my Mum or my sister or both is something I tend to despise. This is because I do things in a way I consider efficient. On the other hand, my Mum and sister don't understand how to give clear directions or how to stick to them. This results in me constantly questioning and being given contradicting directions. What happens? I get pissed off and have a fight. I don't know why she is expecting me to do this bit of gardening. In the past and on the phone, I made it clear that I wasn't doing anything other than cooking and shopping. I wasn't going to do cleaning, or gardening or anything that was related to work because I wanted to rest whilst visiting and not have to do anything. My Mum got pissed off that I really didn't want to do this one day of gardening. This argument arose because I also suddenly remembered on the phone that I'd agreed with my housemate that this Saturday, we'd do some cleaning of our house before we disappeared for a our holidays. My Mum wasn't impressed that I wanted to go home to do some cleaning (about an hour or two max) instead of helping her garden. I emphasised that my younger sister was more than perfectly capable of doing it on her own (Mum can't, bad back). At any rate, if I wasn't coming over, my sister would be doing it anyway.
I've been mentally preparing myself for the ordeal of having to shop and cook with both my Mother and sister. I love these two activities, but not with either of them. I in fact hate doing it with either of them. I don't enjoy it because the way I like to do things is the polar opposite to the way that they do it.
This has resulted in me not being able to borrow the car for the next two weeks and only being allowed to come over on Christmas day at 2pm for lunch and not staying over. Since I don't have a car and it's a public holiday, public transport is most likely non-existent to the hugest pain in the arse that it's not worth bothering. Hence I'm spending Christmas alone.
Now I know I am being a bit of a shit. I am trying to put myself in my in my Mother's shoes, but clearly, she hasn't thought about my perspective.
Now other things I need to take into consideration:
-she's helped me move house
-she's bought me a microwave and blender/processor as housewarming gifts
-she's let me borrow the car when I needed to move house
-she's been good to me
Now you may ask, 'what is one day of gardening to put up with?' The thing is, I know by gut instinct that it won't stop at gardening even though she says it will. There'll be other little things that she'll want me to help out with. These things will chew up my holiday time. I ain't going to be wasting a shitload of annual leave fixing up the house.
It's not fair that she just expects that because I'm on holidays that I can just drop everything and waste my time doing something that I don't enjoy doing with them.
I want to rest during my holidays, not spend it working.
I hate having to deal with my mother and her inconsiderate way of thinking.
I need to sleep on this. Being tired and burnt out didn't exactly make me warm to her sudden presumption that I would help with this gardening.