Thank you to those who were praying for Em...
Well, I can truthfully say... I believe the worst is over, and slowly but surely things are getting a whole lot better. I was sad yesterday when I got a call about Shawna dieing. I cried myself to sleep. I just find it so unfair that people so young have to die... and people who were such nice and beautiful people. I am constantly praying that Val and Lindsay will make it out with as little pain as possible and live without any complications... that's all we can do. My brother and I are going to go see Lindsay soon we hope... because she went on vacation with me last year, and I am pretty close with her and her family, as she is with mine.
To those who wrote in my last entry; I want you all to know I appreciate your prayers, thoughts, and blessings. And to what Angela said; I AM being a whole lot stronger than I usually am. I mean, I have cried and been upset by everything, but... I am not just letting these things control everything else going on in my life. I'm grieving, but also doing so many more things for myself... I kinda found some strength because of Emma. I have been focusing on things I was more or less avoiding... and I have changed... dramatically... in a good way. I found my center. I am happy with who I am becoming. I am working on my health and tan. The only bad thing really going on in my life besides what happened to Emma and Shawna, Val, and Lindsay is that I am having a hard time sleeping because of bad dreams. I wake up like 3 times a night. But I am not cranky like I usually am if I don't get sleep. I think it's because John and I haven't been fighting lately, instead we have been eachothers support system, and it's been great. I haven't been able to eat much either... I haven't found much that looks good, so I just don't eat much. But, I have lost about 13 pounds because of it, so... it's not all bad. I am on some anti-depressants, and they help enormously.
I hope you are all doing well, and know I am keeping you all in my prayers. And like I have said before; don't be scared to call!! I am home all this week. I would love to hear from someone and have it be because they want to talk and not give me more depressing news. I miss you all and I love you all too.
Always,
Elissa
To those who wrote in my last entry; I want you all to know I appreciate your prayers, thoughts, and blessings. And to what Angela said; I AM being a whole lot stronger than I usually am. I mean, I have cried and been upset by everything, but... I am not just letting these things control everything else going on in my life. I'm grieving, but also doing so many more things for myself... I kinda found some strength because of Emma. I have been focusing on things I was more or less avoiding... and I have changed... dramatically... in a good way. I found my center. I am happy with who I am becoming. I am working on my health and tan. The only bad thing really going on in my life besides what happened to Emma and Shawna, Val, and Lindsay is that I am having a hard time sleeping because of bad dreams. I wake up like 3 times a night. But I am not cranky like I usually am if I don't get sleep. I think it's because John and I haven't been fighting lately, instead we have been eachothers support system, and it's been great. I haven't been able to eat much either... I haven't found much that looks good, so I just don't eat much. But, I have lost about 13 pounds because of it, so... it's not all bad. I am on some anti-depressants, and they help enormously.
I hope you are all doing well, and know I am keeping you all in my prayers. And like I have said before; don't be scared to call!! I am home all this week. I would love to hear from someone and have it be because they want to talk and not give me more depressing news. I miss you all and I love you all too.
Always,
Elissa