For just_muse_me - 12.4.1 Reaction
[Co-written with agentsullivan | Set a couple of weeks after THIS]
All Ali wanted was a goddamn effing coffee. She had thought today might be a safe day to brave the supermarket alone for the first time since she had Jamie, but it was a huge mistake. All other times either Andrew or Max had been with her but she was almost out of diapers and those bloody things you shoved into your bra to stop the overflow. Plus, she needed ice cream. Most importantly, she was out of Ben & Jerry's and that alone had her venturing out into the City with just Sunshine bundled up in winter woolies to brave the supermarket alone. But it also seemed to be one of those days that the baby was going to scream her lungs out non-stop for seemingly no reason. She was dry, she was just fed, she was warm, she didn't have a fever, she didn't have nappy rash, she wasn't projectile vomiting... she should be the picture of perfect newborn baby.
But no. Ali wasn't so lucky and by the time she juggled the shopping bag under her arm and headed back out to try and make her way home, she was about ready to tear her own hair out. Jamie just would not stop crying and it had reached the point now where Ali was getting those terse, tight-lipped looks of annoyance from busy New Yorkers, like how dare she spawn such evil Satan offspring who deigned to scream in their delicate ear space. Fuck it all. Ali needed coffee before she mutated into Mike Tyson and started biting off said delicate ears at random turns. She handed over her cash to the Starbucks cashier and gratefully accepted the large Frappe, chosen because she could suck down cold caffeine much quicker than she could hot. Jamie continued to wail. Ali shook her head tiredly and turned the pram around to try and get out of the cafe as quickly as she damn well could so she didn't get any more daggers of death glared at her. But she misjudged and didn't realise she was veering so close to the queue in her haste. The wheel of the pram got caught on one of the chairs and Ali tripped over it, sending the Frappe flying and splashing all down the front of a nearby woman's pristine white Gucci suit.
Ali froze and slapped a hand over her mouth with a horrified gasp. Any other reaction was either going to be to dive into the nearest trash can and never come out or burst into tears just like her screaming baby daughter.
Harri closed her eyes and breathed through the anger. A Gucci suit was just clothes... just pieces of material stiched together with nothing at all--
"Bloody bastard son of of a bitch!" She held her hands away from her body like she was trying to work out if she wanted to hit someone, or strangle them. "Do you have any kind of idea what you've just done?"
She opened her eyes, ready to give the offending coffee thrower a piece of her mind when her anger stopped cold at the sight of the single mother. A single mother whom she'd seen a photo of a couple of days ago in her office. Marc's best friend, it was impossible for Harri not to recognise her. She was filing away any and all personal bits of information that Marc gave her so she did have something tangible to hang on to. His best friend was one of those pieces.
"YES I BLOODY KNOW!" Ali screeched back. "I used to damn well dress just like you in the pretty labels with the perfect hair and," she glanced down with an envious moan, "and the bloody damn well spring line Jimmy Choos! Then I had to push a six pound football-sized ball of a freaking flesh out of a hole the size of a golf ball and now I look like this! Not one of my outfits doesn't have baby puke on it! And I get hardly any sleep because six pound balls of flesh really do like to scream and they don't even know what bloody Gucci is! But thank god I'm at least damn well getting laid because I have not said the f word once and believe me, Miss Pristine, that's a bloody awesome feat for me! And just so you know, I'm technically not screaming at you, I'm screaming at the piece of bastard Powers That Be up bloody there who really thought it was funny to turn someone like you into me, who I just realised isn't even wearing matching friggen socks!" By the time she stopped, she was breathless and had about everyone in the vicinity staring.
Harri took the shouting without batting an eyelid, understanding more about Ali than she probably realised. And certainly more than the other patrons. She stepped out of the queue and rest a hand on Ali's arm gently. "How about I take you somewhere else for another frappe? I'm assuming that's what it was since I'm suddenly extremely cold, and everyone will be able to see that fact. I am never wearing white again."
Ali stared at the woman and then looked down at the hand on her arm. That was probably the first time she had ever yelled at someone and received kindness in return. She blinked, mouth hanging open a little and then Jamie decided to start crying again. Ali put her hand over her eyes. "Oh shit, she never stops," she whimpered. "I'm sorry. This is... jeez. No, it's okay. You're probably as busy as all damn hell and I totally ruined your clothes. Just ignore me. I'm a basketcase. You don't need to feel sorry for me. It's not the kid's fault I can't handle the maternal shit. She's just... just... noise in a Baby Gap onesie."
Harri sighed, and looked down at the baby then back at Ali. "I am as busy as all damn hell, but you're a lot more likely to break down than I am. I can get more clothes, don't worry about the suit. I'll even call a car to drive you wherever you want if you don't want coffee. I'm not feeling sorry for you, I'm just trying to help." Harri was also trying to work out if she should tell Ali who she was, but given Marc's penchant for privacy, she had to wonder if Ali would even know about her. "I'd offer to try and soothe the kid, but I think I'd be more likely to make her cry more."
"You can't possibly make her cry more than me," Ali said with a tearful laugh. She started to dig anxiously around in the Vuitton baby bag and pulled out a lavender box of baby wipes to start wiping the front of Harri's suit down. "I'm so sorry about this. I don't know what's wrong with me. One day I can almost convince myself I might have a shot at Super Mum and the next it all falls apart. My boyfriend got called into work and I ran out of diapers and everything is just going to utter shit lately."
She handed Harri the box of baby wipes as the crying continued into the pained whine Jamie had down to a tee. She bent over the buggy and scooped the baby up into her arms. The infant's hair was an identical colour to Marc before he had to dye it dark. The little baby was more like her uncle than anyone else, and it had hurt Ali's heart in the early days. Until Marc came back... and then went again. She hadn't heard from him since that disastrous day.
Harri started to wipe over the suit as best she could, although she wasn't really all that concerned about it. For once, fashion could wait. If she hadn't been convinced that Marc should contact his best friend and get back in her life before, she was now. Harri pulled her mouth to the side as she considered mother and daughter. "I'm sure you're doing the best you can. No one can blame you for the child randomly bursting into tears, or the fact that that noise just has to have some sort of bloody effect on your nerves. I'd be about ready to stuff the baby in a sound proof room." Harri gave her an apologetic smile as she shrugged. "More argument for why me and children are not compatible. At least you know to pick her up and try and take care of her."
"It didn't come naturally. I spent practically the whole hospital stay wishing her off onto one of the other mothers because I was so terrible. But I had this knight in shining paramedic overalls who was just a natural at helping people and caring for people. I don't know what I would have done without him. Probably ended up in the closed ward. I was going through a really fucked up time and she couldn't have picked a worse moment to come, but it's in her genes, see. Campbells come whenever they fucking please," Ali let out a heavy breath, rubbing Jamie's back. "She has colic, so she's miserable all the time. She got that side of the genes from me. I shouldn't have come out and inflicted myself on the world."
"You're hardly an infliction," Harri assured Ali. She winced slightly at the mention of the Campbell genes, but kept her mouth shut. Even if she wanted Ali to be assured Marc was thinking of her, she couldn't say a word. No one was supposed to know his cover. And the two women that did, probably shouldn't talk about it, even to each other. "Are you sure there isn't anything I can do?"
Ali looked over at the woman as she pressed a kiss to Jamie's little head. She really didn't deserve her kindness after tipping cold coffee all over her and chasing it with a very colourful rant to the world in general. "No," she murmured. "You've already been great and you don't know how much that means to me. I don't live all that far from here. Do you want to come back and have a drink or something? Anything? I've got ice cream. I feel like I owe you something as an apology and thanks."
Harri smiled. "Thank you, but no. As much as I would like to take up that offer I think I'm going to have to opt for a change of clothes instead. I have a meeting in an hour, and I'm not sure this is a look that will convey respect." Although Harri could pretty much do that in just about any outfit, she didn't like the idea of a room full of men looking at her nipples. "How about a raincheck? I'll give you a business card." Harri opened her purse to pull out a card, and handed it to Ali.
Ali accepted the card with a small nod. "Sure, and I'm really sorry. I know it's hard to believe I was actually like you not so long ago. It's funny how everything can change in the blink of an eye..." She cleared her throat and put the card in the baby bag. "I hope your meeting doesn't suck too much."
"It's really not so hard to believe, and your apologies are deeply appreciated." Harri gave Ali's arm another squeeze. "Thank you. I hope your little girl feels better." Harri gave her another smile before she handed back the baby wipes and turned to leave. As she was walking out, she pulled out her cell to call Marc. She needed to see him tonight.
Words: 1957 | All muses referenced with permission
All Ali wanted was a goddamn effing coffee. She had thought today might be a safe day to brave the supermarket alone for the first time since she had Jamie, but it was a huge mistake. All other times either Andrew or Max had been with her but she was almost out of diapers and those bloody things you shoved into your bra to stop the overflow. Plus, she needed ice cream. Most importantly, she was out of Ben & Jerry's and that alone had her venturing out into the City with just Sunshine bundled up in winter woolies to brave the supermarket alone. But it also seemed to be one of those days that the baby was going to scream her lungs out non-stop for seemingly no reason. She was dry, she was just fed, she was warm, she didn't have a fever, she didn't have nappy rash, she wasn't projectile vomiting... she should be the picture of perfect newborn baby.
But no. Ali wasn't so lucky and by the time she juggled the shopping bag under her arm and headed back out to try and make her way home, she was about ready to tear her own hair out. Jamie just would not stop crying and it had reached the point now where Ali was getting those terse, tight-lipped looks of annoyance from busy New Yorkers, like how dare she spawn such evil Satan offspring who deigned to scream in their delicate ear space. Fuck it all. Ali needed coffee before she mutated into Mike Tyson and started biting off said delicate ears at random turns. She handed over her cash to the Starbucks cashier and gratefully accepted the large Frappe, chosen because she could suck down cold caffeine much quicker than she could hot. Jamie continued to wail. Ali shook her head tiredly and turned the pram around to try and get out of the cafe as quickly as she damn well could so she didn't get any more daggers of death glared at her. But she misjudged and didn't realise she was veering so close to the queue in her haste. The wheel of the pram got caught on one of the chairs and Ali tripped over it, sending the Frappe flying and splashing all down the front of a nearby woman's pristine white Gucci suit.
Ali froze and slapped a hand over her mouth with a horrified gasp. Any other reaction was either going to be to dive into the nearest trash can and never come out or burst into tears just like her screaming baby daughter.
Harri closed her eyes and breathed through the anger. A Gucci suit was just clothes... just pieces of material stiched together with nothing at all--
"Bloody bastard son of of a bitch!" She held her hands away from her body like she was trying to work out if she wanted to hit someone, or strangle them. "Do you have any kind of idea what you've just done?"
She opened her eyes, ready to give the offending coffee thrower a piece of her mind when her anger stopped cold at the sight of the single mother. A single mother whom she'd seen a photo of a couple of days ago in her office. Marc's best friend, it was impossible for Harri not to recognise her. She was filing away any and all personal bits of information that Marc gave her so she did have something tangible to hang on to. His best friend was one of those pieces.
"YES I BLOODY KNOW!" Ali screeched back. "I used to damn well dress just like you in the pretty labels with the perfect hair and," she glanced down with an envious moan, "and the bloody damn well spring line Jimmy Choos! Then I had to push a six pound football-sized ball of a freaking flesh out of a hole the size of a golf ball and now I look like this! Not one of my outfits doesn't have baby puke on it! And I get hardly any sleep because six pound balls of flesh really do like to scream and they don't even know what bloody Gucci is! But thank god I'm at least damn well getting laid because I have not said the f word once and believe me, Miss Pristine, that's a bloody awesome feat for me! And just so you know, I'm technically not screaming at you, I'm screaming at the piece of bastard Powers That Be up bloody there who really thought it was funny to turn someone like you into me, who I just realised isn't even wearing matching friggen socks!" By the time she stopped, she was breathless and had about everyone in the vicinity staring.
Harri took the shouting without batting an eyelid, understanding more about Ali than she probably realised. And certainly more than the other patrons. She stepped out of the queue and rest a hand on Ali's arm gently. "How about I take you somewhere else for another frappe? I'm assuming that's what it was since I'm suddenly extremely cold, and everyone will be able to see that fact. I am never wearing white again."
Ali stared at the woman and then looked down at the hand on her arm. That was probably the first time she had ever yelled at someone and received kindness in return. She blinked, mouth hanging open a little and then Jamie decided to start crying again. Ali put her hand over her eyes. "Oh shit, she never stops," she whimpered. "I'm sorry. This is... jeez. No, it's okay. You're probably as busy as all damn hell and I totally ruined your clothes. Just ignore me. I'm a basketcase. You don't need to feel sorry for me. It's not the kid's fault I can't handle the maternal shit. She's just... just... noise in a Baby Gap onesie."
Harri sighed, and looked down at the baby then back at Ali. "I am as busy as all damn hell, but you're a lot more likely to break down than I am. I can get more clothes, don't worry about the suit. I'll even call a car to drive you wherever you want if you don't want coffee. I'm not feeling sorry for you, I'm just trying to help." Harri was also trying to work out if she should tell Ali who she was, but given Marc's penchant for privacy, she had to wonder if Ali would even know about her. "I'd offer to try and soothe the kid, but I think I'd be more likely to make her cry more."
"You can't possibly make her cry more than me," Ali said with a tearful laugh. She started to dig anxiously around in the Vuitton baby bag and pulled out a lavender box of baby wipes to start wiping the front of Harri's suit down. "I'm so sorry about this. I don't know what's wrong with me. One day I can almost convince myself I might have a shot at Super Mum and the next it all falls apart. My boyfriend got called into work and I ran out of diapers and everything is just going to utter shit lately."
She handed Harri the box of baby wipes as the crying continued into the pained whine Jamie had down to a tee. She bent over the buggy and scooped the baby up into her arms. The infant's hair was an identical colour to Marc before he had to dye it dark. The little baby was more like her uncle than anyone else, and it had hurt Ali's heart in the early days. Until Marc came back... and then went again. She hadn't heard from him since that disastrous day.
Harri started to wipe over the suit as best she could, although she wasn't really all that concerned about it. For once, fashion could wait. If she hadn't been convinced that Marc should contact his best friend and get back in her life before, she was now. Harri pulled her mouth to the side as she considered mother and daughter. "I'm sure you're doing the best you can. No one can blame you for the child randomly bursting into tears, or the fact that that noise just has to have some sort of bloody effect on your nerves. I'd be about ready to stuff the baby in a sound proof room." Harri gave her an apologetic smile as she shrugged. "More argument for why me and children are not compatible. At least you know to pick her up and try and take care of her."
"It didn't come naturally. I spent practically the whole hospital stay wishing her off onto one of the other mothers because I was so terrible. But I had this knight in shining paramedic overalls who was just a natural at helping people and caring for people. I don't know what I would have done without him. Probably ended up in the closed ward. I was going through a really fucked up time and she couldn't have picked a worse moment to come, but it's in her genes, see. Campbells come whenever they fucking please," Ali let out a heavy breath, rubbing Jamie's back. "She has colic, so she's miserable all the time. She got that side of the genes from me. I shouldn't have come out and inflicted myself on the world."
"You're hardly an infliction," Harri assured Ali. She winced slightly at the mention of the Campbell genes, but kept her mouth shut. Even if she wanted Ali to be assured Marc was thinking of her, she couldn't say a word. No one was supposed to know his cover. And the two women that did, probably shouldn't talk about it, even to each other. "Are you sure there isn't anything I can do?"
Ali looked over at the woman as she pressed a kiss to Jamie's little head. She really didn't deserve her kindness after tipping cold coffee all over her and chasing it with a very colourful rant to the world in general. "No," she murmured. "You've already been great and you don't know how much that means to me. I don't live all that far from here. Do you want to come back and have a drink or something? Anything? I've got ice cream. I feel like I owe you something as an apology and thanks."
Harri smiled. "Thank you, but no. As much as I would like to take up that offer I think I'm going to have to opt for a change of clothes instead. I have a meeting in an hour, and I'm not sure this is a look that will convey respect." Although Harri could pretty much do that in just about any outfit, she didn't like the idea of a room full of men looking at her nipples. "How about a raincheck? I'll give you a business card." Harri opened her purse to pull out a card, and handed it to Ali.
Ali accepted the card with a small nod. "Sure, and I'm really sorry. I know it's hard to believe I was actually like you not so long ago. It's funny how everything can change in the blink of an eye..." She cleared her throat and put the card in the baby bag. "I hope your meeting doesn't suck too much."
"It's really not so hard to believe, and your apologies are deeply appreciated." Harri gave Ali's arm another squeeze. "Thank you. I hope your little girl feels better." Harri gave her another smile before she handed back the baby wipes and turned to leave. As she was walking out, she pulled out her cell to call Marc. She needed to see him tonight.
Words: 1957 | All muses referenced with permission