Fanmix: Star Trek XI - Kirk/McCoy
This has taken me a while because I'm fussy about fanmixes and I'm still not 100% convinced these are in the right order but I'm going to have to let it go. Normally I don't like using two songs by the same artist but Great Big Sea are unequivocally my Jim Kirk/Leonard McCoy band so that's my excuse. This is a combination of explanation and imagination aka ficlets. Thank you to totallybalanced and wickedground for hand holding and betaing. Everything is on my box.net account so please, please, please let me know what you're downloading. And finally I apologise for the terrible cover art but I had f-all inspiration.
A Plan to Make You Love Me; A James Kirk and Leonard McCoy Fanmix
1. Life Less Ordinary - Carbon Leaf
The night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me, took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me, shook the bones of me
"Ain't got nothing left, but my bones." Bones. He was christened in a boozy celebration Kirk held to commemorate getting in some cadet's knickers.
Jim thought it was hilarious. He thought he was hilarious. "See? It's a cunning play on words." "I know," McCoy arches his brow, unimpressed, although vaguely amused. "No, no, see it's bones as in sawbones. That's a doctor." "I know," McCoy enunciates slowly. "No, no, no, it's bones as in sawbones and as in you've only got your bones left. That's what you said to me the first time you saw me." Jim leans forward and whispers conspiratorially, "Remember?" He leans back in his chair and grins like a kid with a shiny new toy. "Yes, I just about got my weak and feeble mind around the concept," he rolls his eyes. Jim falls off his chair. McCoy laughs long and loud, then orders another whiskey.
2. Scolding Wife - Great Big Sea
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain,
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again.
This wasn't quite what he meant when he said, drunkenly, he'd never get married again. That he was swearing off women for good. He hadn't meant for that to be the green light for Kirk to start, well...courting him. That's the only word for it.
He's fairly certain Jim propositioned his senior tutor so Bones could get onto the rotation he wanted. He found a classic decanter full of his favourite bourbon on his bed on the anniversary of his divorce. When he mentioned that he liked plants, particularly aloe vera he got what Jim thought was an aloe plant for his birthday (it was a cactus). It was dead of course. Jim'd started to worry about it drying out and had taken it upon himself to water it with pure water he liberated from the science labs. Still, it was the thought that counted.
He's not saying he wants to marry James T. Kirk but he's not totally averse to succumbing to Kirk's seductions.
3. Ordinary Day - Great Big Sea
I'll win now but sometimes I'll lose
I've been battered, but I'll never bruise, it's not so bad
And I say way-hey-hey, it's just an ordinary day
and it's all your state of mind
At the end of the day, you've still got to say,
it's all right.
Jim Kirk is constantly getting beaten up, and yet he never gives up. It's the way he lives and he couldn't change how he is. Somehow McCoy is dragged into this after not being allowed his seat in the "bathroom with no windows." In my mind McCoy heard this song a long time ago in a retro bar when stuck in Canada for some random reason and he finds himself humming it when he's patching Kirk up for the 438th time.
4. I Go To Extremes - Billy Joel
Darling I don't know why I go to extremes
Too high or too low there ain't no in-betweens
And if I stand or I fall
It's all or nothing at all
Darling I don't know why I go to extremes.
Sometimes McCoy is convinced James T. Kirk is a masochist. That he deliberately sets out to get his face smashed in. McCoy thinks this whilst patching up Jim's eye from a laceration, his lips from a nasty collision with a lampshade, his wrist from something Jim called a 'motorcycle duel'.
As much as McCoy thinks he should start charging Jim for medical supplies he wouldn't have him any other way.
5. Someday You Will Be Loved - Death Cab for Cutie
You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved
Someday you will be loved.
They both feel unworthy of being loved. Kirk uses sex as defence (as much as he enjoys it), he can't bear to get close to someone for fear of dying and leaving them as broken hearted as his Mother was when his Dad died.
McCoy made his wife so unhappy she took his life, his freedom, his planet and his daughter from him and so he's convinced that he'll just make everyone he gets close to unhappy so it's safer to put up the walls of bitterness and crankiness and stop anyone getting close enough to be made unhappy.
6. Weakened State - Sarah Harmer
I asked for the truth everytime
And now the ugly details
Are stuck in my mind.
He can't believe he's jealous. Jim Kirk does not get jealous especially not of his best friend's wife, his ex-wife at that. He's jealous of a woman that McCoy hated so much he ran away to space to get away from her. That's a whole heap of weirdly placed jealousy right there.
He hadn't meant to ask Bones about her but one night they were drunk and it just seemed normal to say, "What was she like? The Devil Woman?"
Alcohol had loosened McCoy's tongue and so he spent exactly 37 minutes and 20 seconds telling Jim about the swell of her hips, the curve of her breasts, how swollen her ankles got when she was pregnant, how she'd made his stomach flip-flop the moment she first smiled at him. He was just telling Jim the story of how they'd found out she was pregnant when mercifully the 18 shots they'd done caught up with him and he passed out on the table. Jim picked him up and dragged him back to the dorm before collapsing on his bed and making a solemn promise to stop drinking at 15 next time.
7. Comfortably Numb - Dar Williams feat. Ani DiFranco
Relax.
I need some information first.
Just the basic facts:
Can you show me where it hurts?
McCoy was complacent in his fears and phobias and being unloved. Kirk wasn't aware he was broken and in pain. They were just numb. What the world did to them before they broke free of the atmosphere. They get drunk to this song in bars and in their dorm.
8. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
My brain's repeating
"If you've got an impulse let it out"
But they never make it past my mouth.
Kirk finds out about a quaint old tradition of making a mixtape for a friend or lover and for the next 3 weeks he shuts himself away with his PADD and the 23rd century's version of a tape and makes McCoy a mixtape, well actually a mix data recording.
Bones laughs when he gets it and rolls his eyes in that 'you were dropped on your head as a small child weren't you?' way but 4 days later when they're trying to move Kirk's bed back to the wall after a particularly energetic encounter he had the night before, he hears McCoy humming 'bop ba, bop ba'.
Kirk smiles slightly and wonders what McCoy made of the note he put in.
9. Take a Giant Step Outside Your Mind - The Monkees
And sorrows turned your heart to frost
I will melt your heart again.
Remember the feeling as a child
When you woke up and morning smiled
Its time you felt like you did then.
Theres just no percentage in remembering the past
Its time you learned to live again at last.
Kirk makes Bones come out of the protective shell he made for himself after his divorce. He makes him think about what could be rather than what has been and what he fucked up.
10. A Friend Like You - Joshua Radin
Any times I’ve gone without
A home, a meal, a pair of shoes
If you had three you’d give me two
There aint no other friend like you.
Leonard McCoy did not know that James Tiberius Kirk could play the guitar, he does now though. In fact he's being treated to a song Jim (apparently) wrote himself. Something slow and lazy and about friendship - he doesn't know he's still stuck on, 'Jim Kirk plays the guitar?'
Jim is pissed off, and Bones has no idea why. They've been having a shouting match for the past hour about nothing at all. McCoy thinks it started with a sock, but he's not sure. Jim screams something about McCoy's ex and it's the last straw. It's not the first time he's smacked Jim in the mouth, but it'll be the last.
Jim stands there silent and bleeding. "You know that song I wrote that you didn't listen to?"
"Yeah?" Hesitant, starting to understand.
"It was about you, you prick," Jim leaves.
"Fuck."
11. Desire - Ben Lee
Will I survive this?
I want, I want, I want.
I want, I want, I want.
Desire, Desire, Desire.
Desire, Desire, Desire.
The first time they fuck, it's brutal. It's almost 3 years of holding them themselves back. It's full of anger, regret. They could've had this for 3 years. Could have had each other. They're not sure who made the first move; it doesn't matter.
12. The Dance - Garth Brooks
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance.
When McCoy gets drunk he has a tendency to do karaoke. Badly. It's humiliating if a little sweet. They're both pretty drunk this time, but it's Kirk who has to get them back to their room, which is unusual. McCoy slurs, "I did love her. She was beautiful. I'm not sorry. I love my little girl. Love her." Kirk smiles and as he rubs Bones' shoulder, he almost misses 'and I got to you, s'worth it for that'.
13. The Pageant of the Bizarre - Zero 7
It's never gonna be
Normal, you and me
What you're signing on for
Is a storm at sea.
He's his CMO, it's against regulations. He got his commission by essentially committing mutiny and then disobeying everything he'd ever been taught. It was never going to be easy, this thing between them. It made him so tired constantly having to work at keeping it together. He'd just finish with some issue that came up on the bridge and then he'd be back in his quarters listening to McCoy bitch and moan about some hypospray vials that hadn't been labelled correctly. It was constant. Neverending. It was exhausting. Still, laying in bed next to Bones after a long day it was indisputably worth it.
14. The Catastrophe and the Cure - Explosions in the Sky
Instrumental.
They're finally comfortable.
Zip file courtesy of Wickedground
In case anyone was curious this is the 'mixtape' Kirk made for Bones.
Bones - they had this thing back in the 21st century about making 'mixtapes' so here's yours! It's awesome. Although weirdly a little bit unresolved sexual tension-y, and homoerotic but fuck it, it's still awesome.
1. The Boxer // Simon and Garfunkel
2. Fault Line // Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
3. I Kissed A Girl // Paul McDermott
4. Roll To Me // Del Amitri
5. Crush // Cory Branan
6. Come Pick Me Up // Ryan Adams
7. End of the World (Acoustic) // Matt Alber*
8. Because The Night // Patti Smith
9. Sideways // Matt Caplan
10. The Sound of Settling // Death Cab for Cutie
*Contains bonus track, but I really wanted to use the acoustic version.
A Plan to Make You Love Me; A James Kirk and Leonard McCoy Fanmix
1. Life Less Ordinary - Carbon Leaf
The night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me, took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me, shook the bones of me
"Ain't got nothing left, but my bones." Bones. He was christened in a boozy celebration Kirk held to commemorate getting in some cadet's knickers.
Jim thought it was hilarious. He thought he was hilarious. "See? It's a cunning play on words." "I know," McCoy arches his brow, unimpressed, although vaguely amused. "No, no, see it's bones as in sawbones. That's a doctor." "I know," McCoy enunciates slowly. "No, no, no, it's bones as in sawbones and as in you've only got your bones left. That's what you said to me the first time you saw me." Jim leans forward and whispers conspiratorially, "Remember?" He leans back in his chair and grins like a kid with a shiny new toy. "Yes, I just about got my weak and feeble mind around the concept," he rolls his eyes. Jim falls off his chair. McCoy laughs long and loud, then orders another whiskey.
2. Scolding Wife - Great Big Sea
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain,
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again.
This wasn't quite what he meant when he said, drunkenly, he'd never get married again. That he was swearing off women for good. He hadn't meant for that to be the green light for Kirk to start, well...courting him. That's the only word for it.
He's fairly certain Jim propositioned his senior tutor so Bones could get onto the rotation he wanted. He found a classic decanter full of his favourite bourbon on his bed on the anniversary of his divorce. When he mentioned that he liked plants, particularly aloe vera he got what Jim thought was an aloe plant for his birthday (it was a cactus). It was dead of course. Jim'd started to worry about it drying out and had taken it upon himself to water it with pure water he liberated from the science labs. Still, it was the thought that counted.
He's not saying he wants to marry James T. Kirk but he's not totally averse to succumbing to Kirk's seductions.
3. Ordinary Day - Great Big Sea
I'll win now but sometimes I'll lose
I've been battered, but I'll never bruise, it's not so bad
And I say way-hey-hey, it's just an ordinary day
and it's all your state of mind
At the end of the day, you've still got to say,
it's all right.
Jim Kirk is constantly getting beaten up, and yet he never gives up. It's the way he lives and he couldn't change how he is. Somehow McCoy is dragged into this after not being allowed his seat in the "bathroom with no windows." In my mind McCoy heard this song a long time ago in a retro bar when stuck in Canada for some random reason and he finds himself humming it when he's patching Kirk up for the 438th time.
4. I Go To Extremes - Billy Joel
Darling I don't know why I go to extremes
Too high or too low there ain't no in-betweens
And if I stand or I fall
It's all or nothing at all
Darling I don't know why I go to extremes.
Sometimes McCoy is convinced James T. Kirk is a masochist. That he deliberately sets out to get his face smashed in. McCoy thinks this whilst patching up Jim's eye from a laceration, his lips from a nasty collision with a lampshade, his wrist from something Jim called a 'motorcycle duel'.
As much as McCoy thinks he should start charging Jim for medical supplies he wouldn't have him any other way.
5. Someday You Will Be Loved - Death Cab for Cutie
You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved
Someday you will be loved.
They both feel unworthy of being loved. Kirk uses sex as defence (as much as he enjoys it), he can't bear to get close to someone for fear of dying and leaving them as broken hearted as his Mother was when his Dad died.
McCoy made his wife so unhappy she took his life, his freedom, his planet and his daughter from him and so he's convinced that he'll just make everyone he gets close to unhappy so it's safer to put up the walls of bitterness and crankiness and stop anyone getting close enough to be made unhappy.
6. Weakened State - Sarah Harmer
I asked for the truth everytime
And now the ugly details
Are stuck in my mind.
He can't believe he's jealous. Jim Kirk does not get jealous especially not of his best friend's wife, his ex-wife at that. He's jealous of a woman that McCoy hated so much he ran away to space to get away from her. That's a whole heap of weirdly placed jealousy right there.
He hadn't meant to ask Bones about her but one night they were drunk and it just seemed normal to say, "What was she like? The Devil Woman?"
Alcohol had loosened McCoy's tongue and so he spent exactly 37 minutes and 20 seconds telling Jim about the swell of her hips, the curve of her breasts, how swollen her ankles got when she was pregnant, how she'd made his stomach flip-flop the moment she first smiled at him. He was just telling Jim the story of how they'd found out she was pregnant when mercifully the 18 shots they'd done caught up with him and he passed out on the table. Jim picked him up and dragged him back to the dorm before collapsing on his bed and making a solemn promise to stop drinking at 15 next time.
7. Comfortably Numb - Dar Williams feat. Ani DiFranco
Relax.
I need some information first.
Just the basic facts:
Can you show me where it hurts?
McCoy was complacent in his fears and phobias and being unloved. Kirk wasn't aware he was broken and in pain. They were just numb. What the world did to them before they broke free of the atmosphere. They get drunk to this song in bars and in their dorm.
8. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
My brain's repeating
"If you've got an impulse let it out"
But they never make it past my mouth.
Kirk finds out about a quaint old tradition of making a mixtape for a friend or lover and for the next 3 weeks he shuts himself away with his PADD and the 23rd century's version of a tape and makes McCoy a mixtape, well actually a mix data recording.
Bones laughs when he gets it and rolls his eyes in that 'you were dropped on your head as a small child weren't you?' way but 4 days later when they're trying to move Kirk's bed back to the wall after a particularly energetic encounter he had the night before, he hears McCoy humming 'bop ba, bop ba'.
Kirk smiles slightly and wonders what McCoy made of the note he put in.
9. Take a Giant Step Outside Your Mind - The Monkees
And sorrows turned your heart to frost
I will melt your heart again.
Remember the feeling as a child
When you woke up and morning smiled
Its time you felt like you did then.
Theres just no percentage in remembering the past
Its time you learned to live again at last.
Kirk makes Bones come out of the protective shell he made for himself after his divorce. He makes him think about what could be rather than what has been and what he fucked up.
10. A Friend Like You - Joshua Radin
Any times I’ve gone without
A home, a meal, a pair of shoes
If you had three you’d give me two
There aint no other friend like you.
Leonard McCoy did not know that James Tiberius Kirk could play the guitar, he does now though. In fact he's being treated to a song Jim (apparently) wrote himself. Something slow and lazy and about friendship - he doesn't know he's still stuck on, 'Jim Kirk plays the guitar?'
Jim is pissed off, and Bones has no idea why. They've been having a shouting match for the past hour about nothing at all. McCoy thinks it started with a sock, but he's not sure. Jim screams something about McCoy's ex and it's the last straw. It's not the first time he's smacked Jim in the mouth, but it'll be the last.
Jim stands there silent and bleeding. "You know that song I wrote that you didn't listen to?"
"Yeah?" Hesitant, starting to understand.
"It was about you, you prick," Jim leaves.
"Fuck."
11. Desire - Ben Lee
Will I survive this?
I want, I want, I want.
I want, I want, I want.
Desire, Desire, Desire.
Desire, Desire, Desire.
The first time they fuck, it's brutal. It's almost 3 years of holding them themselves back. It's full of anger, regret. They could've had this for 3 years. Could have had each other. They're not sure who made the first move; it doesn't matter.
12. The Dance - Garth Brooks
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance.
When McCoy gets drunk he has a tendency to do karaoke. Badly. It's humiliating if a little sweet. They're both pretty drunk this time, but it's Kirk who has to get them back to their room, which is unusual. McCoy slurs, "I did love her. She was beautiful. I'm not sorry. I love my little girl. Love her." Kirk smiles and as he rubs Bones' shoulder, he almost misses 'and I got to you, s'worth it for that'.
13. The Pageant of the Bizarre - Zero 7
It's never gonna be
Normal, you and me
What you're signing on for
Is a storm at sea.
He's his CMO, it's against regulations. He got his commission by essentially committing mutiny and then disobeying everything he'd ever been taught. It was never going to be easy, this thing between them. It made him so tired constantly having to work at keeping it together. He'd just finish with some issue that came up on the bridge and then he'd be back in his quarters listening to McCoy bitch and moan about some hypospray vials that hadn't been labelled correctly. It was constant. Neverending. It was exhausting. Still, laying in bed next to Bones after a long day it was indisputably worth it.
14. The Catastrophe and the Cure - Explosions in the Sky
Instrumental.
They're finally comfortable.
Zip file courtesy of Wickedground
In case anyone was curious this is the 'mixtape' Kirk made for Bones.
Bones - they had this thing back in the 21st century about making 'mixtapes' so here's yours! It's awesome. Although weirdly a little bit unresolved sexual tension-y, and homoerotic but fuck it, it's still awesome.
1. The Boxer // Simon and Garfunkel
2. Fault Line // Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
3. I Kissed A Girl // Paul McDermott
4. Roll To Me // Del Amitri
5. Crush // Cory Branan
6. Come Pick Me Up // Ryan Adams
7. End of the World (Acoustic) // Matt Alber*
8. Because The Night // Patti Smith
9. Sideways // Matt Caplan
10. The Sound of Settling // Death Cab for Cutie
*Contains bonus track, but I really wanted to use the acoustic version.