Kirk/McCoy fanmix: The Bleeding Heart Show
My 100th post!
My second Kirk/McCoy fanmix!
About: When I started making this fanmix, I put lots of happy songs on it. And then it turned angst-ridden, like really REALLY angsty and desperate. So I decided to change the theme and replaced the cheerful songs with all sad Kirk/McCoy songs I could find. Basically this mix is about them having a relationship, but Bones is screwing it up with his insecurities, whereas Jim tries to give it his best and is as honest as he can be with him. Eventually Bones breaks up with him. Of course, they still love each other, but they're too screwed up to work through it. Stupid, screwed up friendship, indeed!
The mix has two parts, one from Kirk's perspective (how he dealt with the break-up) and one from Bones's.
Warning: ANGST! and sex.
Songs: mostly up-tempo; rock, some indie and mellow pop. All in all, easy listening.
SONGS
001 Weight
(Sarah Slean)
And do you know the weight I'm under / When everything revolves around you you you you
McCoy's PoV.
-- Fanmix starts with McCoy talking about his insecurities. The way Jim is treated since he was promoted Captain and that McCoy feels second best. The quote from the front cover of the fanmix is from this song.
002 Split Me Wide Open
(The Bravery)
Split me wide open and look right inside / There's so many things that I tried to hide / Oh you see right through me / You always see right through me / [...] / My hands on your body like a blind man's on a wall / Oh you always show me, you're the only one who shows me
Kirk's PoV.
-- Jim pleads with Bones that no one can read/knows him like he does. He's desperate in his need to be loved by Bones. Albeit Bones being a gentle person, he treats Jim like a disease.
003 Get It On
(major Major)
You asked me what I've got to hid / I say nothing but my pride / That you should know by now / [...] / You drive me like a stolen car / I say that is going to far / You should know by now
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones is defensive about his feelings and simply cannot give into Jim's neediness. He breaks up with him. The major Major album is really good btw, and you can download it for free from jamendo.com.
004 A Question Mark
(Elliott Smith)
Panic called you out and took you in / Giving you an easy game and letting you win / Giving back a little hatred now to the world / 'Cos it treated you bad / [...] / Said your final word, but honesty and love could have kept us together / One day you'll see it's worth it after all / If you ever want to say you're sorry you can give me a call
Kirk's PoV.
-- Instead of being pissed/angry/sad, Jim acknowledges the break-up as what it is, that Bones is scared of losing him like he lost all that was dear to him in the divorce. He also gives him a choice to save their relationship.
005 The Bleeding Heart Show
(The New Pornographers)
I leapt across three or four beds into your arms / Where I had hidden myself somewhere in your charm / [...] / We have arrived too late to play the bleeding heart show
Kirk's PoV + both.
-- This is basically the end of part one of the mix. Jim knows he found his way into Bones bed/heart via some detours, but he's tired of playing the game of "bleeding hearts" and let's this thing - whatever it is - go.
006 Glittered Blackness
(Explosions in the Sky)
instrumental
-- Interlude. After all Star Trek is not a space soap opera ;) Adventures in space.
007 Telepathy
(Emiliana Torrini)
Why is it so we never know / What we have until it's gone / Until we burn we never learn / What we have until it's gone
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones is melancholy, he misses Jim. Their friendship is strained, Jim doesn't talk to him much anymore. Very powerful song btw and it's quoted on the fanmix back.
008 One Red Thread
(Blind Pilot)
I had the itch to fly and I flew / And from the minute that the line got drawn / I couldn't see straight to you for nothing / now me, I'm the poison in one / yah I'm the one
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones realises it was him destroying their relationship and he feels regret, but lets Jim go.
009 Golden Boy
(Natalie Merchant)
Meteor rise from obscurity / All it took was a killing spree / And the whole world was lying at your feet / Golden boy, golden boy / I know my place, stick to my lines / Stay in your shadow, don't block your light / So you can shine divine / Golden boy, golden boy, golden boy
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones comes to term with the break-up. Jim is after all the golden boy, the hero who saved the day, that men everyone looks up to. It's an ok-thing to be in the background. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE A FANVID TO THIS SONG? *puppy eyes* This is my favourite song from the mix.
010 You Won't Be Mine
(Matchbox Twenty)
Take your straight line for a curve / Make it stretch, the same old line / Try to find if it was worth what you spent / Why you're guilty for the way / You're feeling now
Kirk's PoV + both.
-- The stanzas are all Kirk, but the chorus is more Bones imo. It's just a sad "we will never be" song. And don't be surprised if the track runs on after it's over. There's a hidden instrumental part at the end. This song is very powerful...and depressing *sniff* And I'm actually happy that I finally can use it for a fanmix.
all songs + cover art: zip file (hxxp >> http)
(the song information in this zip is changed to fit the fanmix, I added the covers for itunes as well)
alternative cover: one, two, back
previous mix: AEIOU: Baby, I Love You
Mood Theme: Kirk/McCoy, Star Trek XI
Graphics (icons, wallpaper): 01, 02
Please comment if you like the mix ♥ And please friend this community if you like what you see :D
My next mix is going to be a cheerful one I swear. Maybe I do an EP with the happy songs I cut from the mix. I hope you enjoy! Comments are very much appreciated! ♥
Little (late) pimpage:
startrek_fm startrek_fm startrek_fm !
My second Kirk/McCoy fanmix!
About: When I started making this fanmix, I put lots of happy songs on it. And then it turned angst-ridden, like really REALLY angsty and desperate. So I decided to change the theme and replaced the cheerful songs with all sad Kirk/McCoy songs I could find. Basically this mix is about them having a relationship, but Bones is screwing it up with his insecurities, whereas Jim tries to give it his best and is as honest as he can be with him. Eventually Bones breaks up with him. Of course, they still love each other, but they're too screwed up to work through it. Stupid, screwed up friendship, indeed!
The mix has two parts, one from Kirk's perspective (how he dealt with the break-up) and one from Bones's.
Warning: ANGST! and sex.
Songs: mostly up-tempo; rock, some indie and mellow pop. All in all, easy listening.
SONGS
001 Weight
(Sarah Slean)
And do you know the weight I'm under / When everything revolves around you you you you
McCoy's PoV.
-- Fanmix starts with McCoy talking about his insecurities. The way Jim is treated since he was promoted Captain and that McCoy feels second best. The quote from the front cover of the fanmix is from this song.
002 Split Me Wide Open
(The Bravery)
Split me wide open and look right inside / There's so many things that I tried to hide / Oh you see right through me / You always see right through me / [...] / My hands on your body like a blind man's on a wall / Oh you always show me, you're the only one who shows me
Kirk's PoV.
-- Jim pleads with Bones that no one can read/knows him like he does. He's desperate in his need to be loved by Bones. Albeit Bones being a gentle person, he treats Jim like a disease.
003 Get It On
(major Major)
You asked me what I've got to hid / I say nothing but my pride / That you should know by now / [...] / You drive me like a stolen car / I say that is going to far / You should know by now
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones is defensive about his feelings and simply cannot give into Jim's neediness. He breaks up with him. The major Major album is really good btw, and you can download it for free from jamendo.com.
004 A Question Mark
(Elliott Smith)
Panic called you out and took you in / Giving you an easy game and letting you win / Giving back a little hatred now to the world / 'Cos it treated you bad / [...] / Said your final word, but honesty and love could have kept us together / One day you'll see it's worth it after all / If you ever want to say you're sorry you can give me a call
Kirk's PoV.
-- Instead of being pissed/angry/sad, Jim acknowledges the break-up as what it is, that Bones is scared of losing him like he lost all that was dear to him in the divorce. He also gives him a choice to save their relationship.
005 The Bleeding Heart Show
(The New Pornographers)
I leapt across three or four beds into your arms / Where I had hidden myself somewhere in your charm / [...] / We have arrived too late to play the bleeding heart show
Kirk's PoV + both.
-- This is basically the end of part one of the mix. Jim knows he found his way into Bones bed/heart via some detours, but he's tired of playing the game of "bleeding hearts" and let's this thing - whatever it is - go.
006 Glittered Blackness
(Explosions in the Sky)
instrumental
-- Interlude. After all Star Trek is not a space soap opera ;) Adventures in space.
007 Telepathy
(Emiliana Torrini)
Why is it so we never know / What we have until it's gone / Until we burn we never learn / What we have until it's gone
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones is melancholy, he misses Jim. Their friendship is strained, Jim doesn't talk to him much anymore. Very powerful song btw and it's quoted on the fanmix back.
008 One Red Thread
(Blind Pilot)
I had the itch to fly and I flew / And from the minute that the line got drawn / I couldn't see straight to you for nothing / now me, I'm the poison in one / yah I'm the one
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones realises it was him destroying their relationship and he feels regret, but lets Jim go.
009 Golden Boy
(Natalie Merchant)
Meteor rise from obscurity / All it took was a killing spree / And the whole world was lying at your feet / Golden boy, golden boy / I know my place, stick to my lines / Stay in your shadow, don't block your light / So you can shine divine / Golden boy, golden boy, golden boy
McCoy's PoV.
-- Bones comes to term with the break-up. Jim is after all the golden boy, the hero who saved the day, that men everyone looks up to. It's an ok-thing to be in the background. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE A FANVID TO THIS SONG? *puppy eyes* This is my favourite song from the mix.
010 You Won't Be Mine
(Matchbox Twenty)
Take your straight line for a curve / Make it stretch, the same old line / Try to find if it was worth what you spent / Why you're guilty for the way / You're feeling now
Kirk's PoV + both.
-- The stanzas are all Kirk, but the chorus is more Bones imo. It's just a sad "we will never be" song. And don't be surprised if the track runs on after it's over. There's a hidden instrumental part at the end. This song is very powerful...and depressing *sniff* And I'm actually happy that I finally can use it for a fanmix.
all songs + cover art: zip file (hxxp >> http)
(the song information in this zip is changed to fit the fanmix, I added the covers for itunes as well)
alternative cover: one, two, back
previous mix: AEIOU: Baby, I Love You
Mood Theme: Kirk/McCoy, Star Trek XI
Graphics (icons, wallpaper): 01, 02
Please comment if you like the mix ♥ And please friend this community if you like what you see :D
My next mix is going to be a cheerful one I swear. Maybe I do an EP with the happy songs I cut from the mix. I hope you enjoy! Comments are very much appreciated! ♥
Little (late) pimpage:
startrek_fm startrek_fm startrek_fm !