Drama... Everyone hates me. Except...
Ok, so when you think about who hates you, one should ask themselves "I wonder who hates me?" No... In my case it's, "I wonder who doesn't hate me, who on this earth can stand me out of all the other people in this place?". So then ones comes to wonder... why does everyone hate me? I know why, its a long extensive story that will take entirely too long to tell because I have to go to work.. oh wait, I'm too depressed to go to work so therefore I will not go. There. Now I have lots of time to tell everything. I can't show up to work looking like this, I look like a wreck.
This whole thing is just a big misunderstanding, nobody wants to take responsibility for their own actions. Alright, where to begin with the whole debacle. Lets start with the ex boyfriend (Dan). We lived together for about a year, and then things started to fall apart. He's an extremely jealous person. Knowing that I have mostly guy friends I should have never given it a second thought. Jealousy always ruins my relationships. I wanted different things, he wanted commitment, which I was willing to give, but only to a certain extent. He wanted me to move in to his new place and I wasn't ready to do that again. We had already moved out from the first house we had together from a huge fight. I moved out because the roomates we had were pigs and couldn't keep the house clean. So... I started seeing someone else then called it off because I missed Dan entirely too much. By the time I wanted to mend things, it was too late. He was already seeing someone else at the time and lied to me and said he wasn't going seeing anybody and would wait for me and that he couldn't find anyone better. I knew one thing was true: He had a girlfriend and he wasn't coming back to me. So, I decided to seek closure and go to his house last night with Nikki to get the last of my things so I would never have to bother him anymore. He had my acoustic guitar (Which is partially now broken from being over there) and he's got my van (Which was my fathers and means a lot to me). When we were together he promised to fix it and he knew it would mean the world to me. We kind of stopped talking and that idea went down the drain.
He wasn't able to give me the van last night because he trashed it over the months, and it had to be jump started. I walked in the door and said "Can I have my guitar?" He and his roomates scrambled around til they found it. Handed it to me and I took it and threw it over my shoulder. I hesitated for a moment... then asked, "Can you help me get the van tonight?". "I'd appreciate it if you took it back tomorrow because it's not ready right now, its got all my stuff in it", he pointed out. Then I said, "I kind of want to take it tonight...". "Fine," he robotically replied. Dan threw the key at the floor next to me from across the room. "Take the fucking key and you can do it yourself, I dunno, it needs to be jump started you know?". I threw the key back at him. "I am not taking it tonight then, but I'm coming back tomorrow." Done and done, me and Nikki left and didn't look back. I'm planning on going there tonight to get it and that will be it.
Next issue. Jackie wanted to hang out yesterday, so we make plans to chill by the pool and eat eegee's together. While we chat it up, her cell phone rings. It's Justin. (They recently had a break-up and it wasn't pretty, it involved her getting all her things from his house and calling off the engagement). Anyhow, Justin calls to say hanging out with Skippy aka Sean because (One of my old roomates from the first house I lived in with Dan) he's in town from Phoenix. The reason they call is because they're bored. She invites them to come down to the pool and they show up. I had past rivalry with Sean because we had a huge misunderstanding when I moved out of the old place, but I decided to be mature about it and brush that off. It was almost a year ago that I moved from there in August. Sean had lots to tell me about Dan, including that Dan broke into the old house to get the last of his things when Skippy told him he couldn't get it til the next day.
With that, Skip filed a law suit against my ex, it was the state VS Daniel. Dan lost the case and had to pay a list of fines to the state including counseling classes for 3 months. I then find out that he had slept with other girls when we were in between eachother, Including Ariel who he did several times which he lied to me about.
Catching him in lies: I made a fake myspace account with this fictitous girl named "Beth". I know it sounds crazy, but hear me out. I messaged Dan to find out information and get his phone number so I could call him to make an arrangement to get my things back because he wasn't calling me or replying my messages on myspace, but he definately wrote "Beth" back every time. Sure enough, he thought "Beth" was cute and wanted to meet her (all while having a girlfriend) and gave a good phone number out to me. His phone was turned off due to non payment, so he gave me one of his roomates numbers. Low and behold, I went to his house last night to get the van and you know the rest. His girlfriend (Ashleigh) wrote a message to "Beth" because she was getting upset by all the comments and messages that I was sending him on myspace. She said she'd confronted Daniel about this, and he said he knew "Beth" as an old friend from highschool and wanted to catch up. Wow. He's been caught in another lie. Just like that. Not only has he lied to me, he lied to his girlfriend. Which, by the way, he said he wouldn't date her because she's got cancer and hasn't much time left. I thought that was really rude of him to say. No matter how much you love someone, even if they have cancer, you should be with them if you care about them.
Now... the last issue. One may ask, "What could be more dramatic or upsetting than all of that?". Here it is, final and most ridiculous part of this all. I've had a myspace account for almost 3 years, and my 13 year old nephew wanted to have an account. I set one up for him so that he could stay in contact with his friends and also me if he ever needed anyone to talk to, because he seems like he needs someone to talk to every now and then when he looks sad. I thought nothing of it, because of security settings, no one can add him to their friends, he can only add other people. I made sure there were absolutely no pictures of him up and that his name didn't show. Then, Joey tells me he made an account for Leah (His twin sister). I thought that was nice of him to set that up for her. He showed her how to add pictures and add color to her profile. Leah told me that she was happy because she could get in contact with friends and since she didn't have a phone at home she could talk with them online. They wrote whatever they wanted to about themselves, I didn't really approve of some of the things that they had written. But, it was their account. All completely harmless right? Not according to my sister and the rest of my family.
I come home with Nikki to check our myspace accounts on MY computer and read our messages. Keep in mind this is at 1am, and I am bringing my acoustic guitar from Dans into my bedroom, Liz (My sisters sister in law who I live with) stops me in the hallway. She says "Everyone in the family is extremely upset with you, especially Gary and your sister Dionne". I ask, "Why? What happened?" And she says "You know what you did...". I then insist on she telling me, because I have no idea what I've done wrong. She then tells me that somehow her parents found out about the kids having a myspace account, and that I was on their friends list and it was my responsibility to tell them if I saw that. They said it was all my fault they had an account, and that they could have given out phone numbers and addresses. I then told her, "They are smarter than that, they would never do that, and I showed Joey how to use myspace and he knows not to talk to anyone he doesn't already know". She then says "Well that doesn't matter because Joey got so upset that he pushed Leah into the livingroom window and broke it. She could have been seriously hurt, do you know what you have done?!" and I said "All I did was show him how to use myspace, he's smart enough to know how to do the rest on his account, and I didn't push her. He did." I also wanted to say, "Maybe if their parents werent so strict he wouldn't have gotten so upset and he wouldn't have pushed her." When his parents found out they must have scared him into thinking that having a myspace account was bad and said he was going to be punished so he was scared and he pushed her. Leah probably told on him, or something of that sort. I didn't think it was a big deal, their parents are making it a HUGE issue.
So, Liz then continues to tell me that her husband has blocked myspace from all the computers in the house including mine. So that was the last straw. This is so stupid. It's JUST myspace! A place for friends. Where people can talk to eachother and not have to call one another, where people stay in touch. So Im sort of going through one of the hardest times in my life. Why can't people take responsibility for their own actions? Taking responsibility for ones own actions was my fathers #1 rule. Instead of scaring Joey into saying he was going to be punished for having a myspace account, all they had to do was block it on the computer if they didn't want him to have one, or delete his account. They didn't have to make it into this gargantuan problem that they have. I am so upset, I don't want to even live here anymore. I feel like I have no family because they all hate me and love to play the blame game and point the finger. I only have 3 really good friends I can count on. Andy is one of them... He says I can stay with him and even move in with him if I have nowhere else to go. I don't want to feel like I am taking up space anywhere, because that is how my family has made me feel. They have made me feel like I am a waste of space, and I am not good enough for them. They push me until they push me off the edge and I don't feel wanted here anymore. I want to move out so I no longer have to disappoint them. I have tried so hard to be a good person and no matter what I do it turns to shit or it just isn't good enough. I am only a human being, not a prodigy. What do they want from me? I have tried and tried and tried, this is just all I have to give. I am done. Anyhow, This is all I have to say for now. I will see you all soon enough.
This whole thing is just a big misunderstanding, nobody wants to take responsibility for their own actions. Alright, where to begin with the whole debacle. Lets start with the ex boyfriend (Dan). We lived together for about a year, and then things started to fall apart. He's an extremely jealous person. Knowing that I have mostly guy friends I should have never given it a second thought. Jealousy always ruins my relationships. I wanted different things, he wanted commitment, which I was willing to give, but only to a certain extent. He wanted me to move in to his new place and I wasn't ready to do that again. We had already moved out from the first house we had together from a huge fight. I moved out because the roomates we had were pigs and couldn't keep the house clean. So... I started seeing someone else then called it off because I missed Dan entirely too much. By the time I wanted to mend things, it was too late. He was already seeing someone else at the time and lied to me and said he wasn't going seeing anybody and would wait for me and that he couldn't find anyone better. I knew one thing was true: He had a girlfriend and he wasn't coming back to me. So, I decided to seek closure and go to his house last night with Nikki to get the last of my things so I would never have to bother him anymore. He had my acoustic guitar (Which is partially now broken from being over there) and he's got my van (Which was my fathers and means a lot to me). When we were together he promised to fix it and he knew it would mean the world to me. We kind of stopped talking and that idea went down the drain.
He wasn't able to give me the van last night because he trashed it over the months, and it had to be jump started. I walked in the door and said "Can I have my guitar?" He and his roomates scrambled around til they found it. Handed it to me and I took it and threw it over my shoulder. I hesitated for a moment... then asked, "Can you help me get the van tonight?". "I'd appreciate it if you took it back tomorrow because it's not ready right now, its got all my stuff in it", he pointed out. Then I said, "I kind of want to take it tonight...". "Fine," he robotically replied. Dan threw the key at the floor next to me from across the room. "Take the fucking key and you can do it yourself, I dunno, it needs to be jump started you know?". I threw the key back at him. "I am not taking it tonight then, but I'm coming back tomorrow." Done and done, me and Nikki left and didn't look back. I'm planning on going there tonight to get it and that will be it.
Next issue. Jackie wanted to hang out yesterday, so we make plans to chill by the pool and eat eegee's together. While we chat it up, her cell phone rings. It's Justin. (They recently had a break-up and it wasn't pretty, it involved her getting all her things from his house and calling off the engagement). Anyhow, Justin calls to say hanging out with Skippy aka Sean because (One of my old roomates from the first house I lived in with Dan) he's in town from Phoenix. The reason they call is because they're bored. She invites them to come down to the pool and they show up. I had past rivalry with Sean because we had a huge misunderstanding when I moved out of the old place, but I decided to be mature about it and brush that off. It was almost a year ago that I moved from there in August. Sean had lots to tell me about Dan, including that Dan broke into the old house to get the last of his things when Skippy told him he couldn't get it til the next day.
With that, Skip filed a law suit against my ex, it was the state VS Daniel. Dan lost the case and had to pay a list of fines to the state including counseling classes for 3 months. I then find out that he had slept with other girls when we were in between eachother, Including Ariel who he did several times which he lied to me about.
Catching him in lies: I made a fake myspace account with this fictitous girl named "Beth". I know it sounds crazy, but hear me out. I messaged Dan to find out information and get his phone number so I could call him to make an arrangement to get my things back because he wasn't calling me or replying my messages on myspace, but he definately wrote "Beth" back every time. Sure enough, he thought "Beth" was cute and wanted to meet her (all while having a girlfriend) and gave a good phone number out to me. His phone was turned off due to non payment, so he gave me one of his roomates numbers. Low and behold, I went to his house last night to get the van and you know the rest. His girlfriend (Ashleigh) wrote a message to "Beth" because she was getting upset by all the comments and messages that I was sending him on myspace. She said she'd confronted Daniel about this, and he said he knew "Beth" as an old friend from highschool and wanted to catch up. Wow. He's been caught in another lie. Just like that. Not only has he lied to me, he lied to his girlfriend. Which, by the way, he said he wouldn't date her because she's got cancer and hasn't much time left. I thought that was really rude of him to say. No matter how much you love someone, even if they have cancer, you should be with them if you care about them.
Now... the last issue. One may ask, "What could be more dramatic or upsetting than all of that?". Here it is, final and most ridiculous part of this all. I've had a myspace account for almost 3 years, and my 13 year old nephew wanted to have an account. I set one up for him so that he could stay in contact with his friends and also me if he ever needed anyone to talk to, because he seems like he needs someone to talk to every now and then when he looks sad. I thought nothing of it, because of security settings, no one can add him to their friends, he can only add other people. I made sure there were absolutely no pictures of him up and that his name didn't show. Then, Joey tells me he made an account for Leah (His twin sister). I thought that was nice of him to set that up for her. He showed her how to add pictures and add color to her profile. Leah told me that she was happy because she could get in contact with friends and since she didn't have a phone at home she could talk with them online. They wrote whatever they wanted to about themselves, I didn't really approve of some of the things that they had written. But, it was their account. All completely harmless right? Not according to my sister and the rest of my family.
I come home with Nikki to check our myspace accounts on MY computer and read our messages. Keep in mind this is at 1am, and I am bringing my acoustic guitar from Dans into my bedroom, Liz (My sisters sister in law who I live with) stops me in the hallway. She says "Everyone in the family is extremely upset with you, especially Gary and your sister Dionne". I ask, "Why? What happened?" And she says "You know what you did...". I then insist on she telling me, because I have no idea what I've done wrong. She then tells me that somehow her parents found out about the kids having a myspace account, and that I was on their friends list and it was my responsibility to tell them if I saw that. They said it was all my fault they had an account, and that they could have given out phone numbers and addresses. I then told her, "They are smarter than that, they would never do that, and I showed Joey how to use myspace and he knows not to talk to anyone he doesn't already know". She then says "Well that doesn't matter because Joey got so upset that he pushed Leah into the livingroom window and broke it. She could have been seriously hurt, do you know what you have done?!" and I said "All I did was show him how to use myspace, he's smart enough to know how to do the rest on his account, and I didn't push her. He did." I also wanted to say, "Maybe if their parents werent so strict he wouldn't have gotten so upset and he wouldn't have pushed her." When his parents found out they must have scared him into thinking that having a myspace account was bad and said he was going to be punished so he was scared and he pushed her. Leah probably told on him, or something of that sort. I didn't think it was a big deal, their parents are making it a HUGE issue.
So, Liz then continues to tell me that her husband has blocked myspace from all the computers in the house including mine. So that was the last straw. This is so stupid. It's JUST myspace! A place for friends. Where people can talk to eachother and not have to call one another, where people stay in touch. So Im sort of going through one of the hardest times in my life. Why can't people take responsibility for their own actions? Taking responsibility for ones own actions was my fathers #1 rule. Instead of scaring Joey into saying he was going to be punished for having a myspace account, all they had to do was block it on the computer if they didn't want him to have one, or delete his account. They didn't have to make it into this gargantuan problem that they have. I am so upset, I don't want to even live here anymore. I feel like I have no family because they all hate me and love to play the blame game and point the finger. I only have 3 really good friends I can count on. Andy is one of them... He says I can stay with him and even move in with him if I have nowhere else to go. I don't want to feel like I am taking up space anywhere, because that is how my family has made me feel. They have made me feel like I am a waste of space, and I am not good enough for them. They push me until they push me off the edge and I don't feel wanted here anymore. I want to move out so I no longer have to disappoint them. I have tried so hard to be a good person and no matter what I do it turns to shit or it just isn't good enough. I am only a human being, not a prodigy. What do they want from me? I have tried and tried and tried, this is just all I have to give. I am done. Anyhow, This is all I have to say for now. I will see you all soon enough.