Tragedies Currently Stuck In My Head
I said I wanted to get myself writing, and I think I may know what subject it might end up being on. There are certain things that just always end up getting stuck in my head for a while once I hear about them, even if it's been years. The other day, my roommate and I were watching this program on E! about the 10 worst or most shocking events... it was mostly about sudden random shootings in the US. The event at the number one spot was the Virigina Tech shooting, (which neither of us were surprised by although we didn't expect it either). The one right before that was the Columbine High School massacre.
Now, I remember when both those things happened, and although the Virigina Tech shooting was certainly horrible and a tragedy and more people died during it, for some reason I'm still just moved more by Columbine. I was just 9 years old at the time that happend, and I don't remember being too scared or shocked by it at all--what I mostly remember is talking about it with classmates and being sad about it and arguing over how many people we had heard had died. I also remember teachers being the ones freaking out about it most, and constantly telling us we could always talk to them and setting up every monday to be a day for everyone to meet in an advisory group (I didn't connect this to the shooting at the time but looking back it's kinda obvious).
Mostly, I think it's because although I don't agree with it at all, I can somewhat understand the motivation behind the Columbine shooting. I think anyone who was constantly picked on growing up can somewhat understand the desire to want to get back at the jocks and bitches and superficial idiots in high school. I would never be able to do it at all, and I've always been more of the type to hurt myself long before I strike back at anyone else, but I can sort of understand who would. I don't condone or approve of it, but I don't consider Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold to have been be pure evil. Their actions were, and I think they may have wanted to be, but I don't think in reality that they were completely. I don't believe the shitty rumors of people who say that they were just planning for the high school to be the beginning of a huge rampage. I think they only wanted to get back at the high school, because high school is an environment unlike any other really--you just can't compare other places to high school. It's a unique and often painful expierience, and they only wanted revenge on that I believe. Especially since from reports, they seemed to target jocks and kids wearing the school colors or hats or jackets--there seemed to have been motivation there, some real reason for it. Plus, the kids actually had said to one of their friends to not go to school that day. That just proves to me that they weren't totally evil, just hurt and angry. Also, in a high school...that had to really be horrifying. Because you're still so young, and you have grown up with so many of these people. Regardless of how happy or close you are to other people, high school is in a way like a family--you know so many people, you're all in the same boat wanting to graduate and fit in. And then to see someone come in and all of a sudden start killing these people you've passed in the hall so many times... it's just such a horrible thing to imagine. And they followed the classic end of kiling themselves once they felt they were finished, but I believe that they wanted to kill themselves all along, and just didn't want to die without having done something. They would have tried to escape if they had been truely evil I think, fought back and attacked police to try and get away. Or they would've surrendered if they didn't really care about what they did. I think they really wanted to kill themselves all along, but wanted to strike back for what they did. And that's what makes Columbine so sad and horrifying and tragic...because I can somewhat understand it and it's horrifying. Everything about it just makes me so sad and heartbroken. Especially the pictures from that day, of kids trying to climb out windows and getting shot, the stories of what they did in the library...I didn't really understand what the big deal was at the time, but since then I have been heartbroken by the stories. And whenever it's mentioned, it does get stuck in my head for days or weeks after..
Now see, Virigina Tech just seems like such a different story. Yeah, it's still a "school shooting", but the fact that it's at a university just makes it totally different in my mind. You don't have that same family or closeness with other students, because you're going for different degrees, different goals, coming from different places and there are so many people you just don't know. I mean, don't get me wrong, it's still absolutely horrifying what happened and there's no way seeing people die around you can't be horrifying, but I think recognizing the shooter is scarier than it being a stranger. Also, the shooter (Cho) at Virigina Tech I feel no sympathy for and just get angry and pissed at him. They say he had mental problems, and maybe he did (I hear his writing was awful but also incredibly disturbing), but it just pisses me off that I can't think of any real motivation he had for it other than the infamy of being a school shooter. He just wanted to kill people. And he sent his fucking picture to NBC--I still can't get over that. How pompus do you have to be to do that? He supposely sent a video manifesto to NBC, calling himself to be like Jesus Christ and getting back at America (and he MENTIONED Dylan and Eric which pisses me off even more because he's not like them) and it just sounds so much like he's making up reasons to justify his actions. But he doesn't really have them. People didn't know who he was. He had plenty of other options. You have so much more freedom in college than in high school. And his victims were random too--it was anyone who wasn't him (not just the rich kids or anyone who he claimed he was aiming for). And he shot people THROUGH DOORS! That's just cowardly and wrong. You don't even have the decency to look at people you kill? Or let them be when they close and barricade the door? And his killing himself WAS the coward's way out. It was him escaping the consequences of his actions. Especially since he barred the door of the building he did the most of his killing in. He just disgusts me. You aren't a hero or tragic if you just kill innocent people in the name of justice, and ask for media coverage on it. Now, Virigina Tech doesn't usually get stuck in my head when I hear about it, but because it was featured on the same program as Columbine, I couldn't help but compare the two and wanted to get that out.
So does anyone else have any opinion/comment on this they'd like to share?
(I really hope I didn't offend anyone with this...I didn't mean to, but I know these are sensitive issues and events so I apologize if I brought back bad memories or said something that hurt someone)
Now, I remember when both those things happened, and although the Virigina Tech shooting was certainly horrible and a tragedy and more people died during it, for some reason I'm still just moved more by Columbine. I was just 9 years old at the time that happend, and I don't remember being too scared or shocked by it at all--what I mostly remember is talking about it with classmates and being sad about it and arguing over how many people we had heard had died. I also remember teachers being the ones freaking out about it most, and constantly telling us we could always talk to them and setting up every monday to be a day for everyone to meet in an advisory group (I didn't connect this to the shooting at the time but looking back it's kinda obvious).
Mostly, I think it's because although I don't agree with it at all, I can somewhat understand the motivation behind the Columbine shooting. I think anyone who was constantly picked on growing up can somewhat understand the desire to want to get back at the jocks and bitches and superficial idiots in high school. I would never be able to do it at all, and I've always been more of the type to hurt myself long before I strike back at anyone else, but I can sort of understand who would. I don't condone or approve of it, but I don't consider Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold to have been be pure evil. Their actions were, and I think they may have wanted to be, but I don't think in reality that they were completely. I don't believe the shitty rumors of people who say that they were just planning for the high school to be the beginning of a huge rampage. I think they only wanted to get back at the high school, because high school is an environment unlike any other really--you just can't compare other places to high school. It's a unique and often painful expierience, and they only wanted revenge on that I believe. Especially since from reports, they seemed to target jocks and kids wearing the school colors or hats or jackets--there seemed to have been motivation there, some real reason for it. Plus, the kids actually had said to one of their friends to not go to school that day. That just proves to me that they weren't totally evil, just hurt and angry. Also, in a high school...that had to really be horrifying. Because you're still so young, and you have grown up with so many of these people. Regardless of how happy or close you are to other people, high school is in a way like a family--you know so many people, you're all in the same boat wanting to graduate and fit in. And then to see someone come in and all of a sudden start killing these people you've passed in the hall so many times... it's just such a horrible thing to imagine. And they followed the classic end of kiling themselves once they felt they were finished, but I believe that they wanted to kill themselves all along, and just didn't want to die without having done something. They would have tried to escape if they had been truely evil I think, fought back and attacked police to try and get away. Or they would've surrendered if they didn't really care about what they did. I think they really wanted to kill themselves all along, but wanted to strike back for what they did. And that's what makes Columbine so sad and horrifying and tragic...because I can somewhat understand it and it's horrifying. Everything about it just makes me so sad and heartbroken. Especially the pictures from that day, of kids trying to climb out windows and getting shot, the stories of what they did in the library...I didn't really understand what the big deal was at the time, but since then I have been heartbroken by the stories. And whenever it's mentioned, it does get stuck in my head for days or weeks after..
Now see, Virigina Tech just seems like such a different story. Yeah, it's still a "school shooting", but the fact that it's at a university just makes it totally different in my mind. You don't have that same family or closeness with other students, because you're going for different degrees, different goals, coming from different places and there are so many people you just don't know. I mean, don't get me wrong, it's still absolutely horrifying what happened and there's no way seeing people die around you can't be horrifying, but I think recognizing the shooter is scarier than it being a stranger. Also, the shooter (Cho) at Virigina Tech I feel no sympathy for and just get angry and pissed at him. They say he had mental problems, and maybe he did (I hear his writing was awful but also incredibly disturbing), but it just pisses me off that I can't think of any real motivation he had for it other than the infamy of being a school shooter. He just wanted to kill people. And he sent his fucking picture to NBC--I still can't get over that. How pompus do you have to be to do that? He supposely sent a video manifesto to NBC, calling himself to be like Jesus Christ and getting back at America (and he MENTIONED Dylan and Eric which pisses me off even more because he's not like them) and it just sounds so much like he's making up reasons to justify his actions. But he doesn't really have them. People didn't know who he was. He had plenty of other options. You have so much more freedom in college than in high school. And his victims were random too--it was anyone who wasn't him (not just the rich kids or anyone who he claimed he was aiming for). And he shot people THROUGH DOORS! That's just cowardly and wrong. You don't even have the decency to look at people you kill? Or let them be when they close and barricade the door? And his killing himself WAS the coward's way out. It was him escaping the consequences of his actions. Especially since he barred the door of the building he did the most of his killing in. He just disgusts me. You aren't a hero or tragic if you just kill innocent people in the name of justice, and ask for media coverage on it. Now, Virigina Tech doesn't usually get stuck in my head when I hear about it, but because it was featured on the same program as Columbine, I couldn't help but compare the two and wanted to get that out.
So does anyone else have any opinion/comment on this they'd like to share?
(I really hope I didn't offend anyone with this...I didn't mean to, but I know these are sensitive issues and events so I apologize if I brought back bad memories or said something that hurt someone)