get me out
have you ever been genuinely excited to go somewhere or hang out with some people, only to just want to leave within 5 minutes of being there? that happened to me today
this week has been incredibly busy, and very productive. i have accomplished much, and have been constantly running from one place to another, with one person or another. yet I feel incredibly lonely and depressed, worse than it has been in a long time.
yesterday i was attending a jazz concert with my parents in thousand oaks, and i found myself wondering what it would feel like to jump off the mezzanine level. on the way back i wondered what it would feel like to let go of the steering wheel and crash at 70mph. now in neither of these scenarios did I come close to any sort of action, nor did I even think of dying, but it is alarming just the same. i hope that last night was just a dark dark time without a recurrence.
uuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
this week has been incredibly busy, and very productive. i have accomplished much, and have been constantly running from one place to another, with one person or another. yet I feel incredibly lonely and depressed, worse than it has been in a long time.
yesterday i was attending a jazz concert with my parents in thousand oaks, and i found myself wondering what it would feel like to jump off the mezzanine level. on the way back i wondered what it would feel like to let go of the steering wheel and crash at 70mph. now in neither of these scenarios did I come close to any sort of action, nor did I even think of dying, but it is alarming just the same. i hope that last night was just a dark dark time without a recurrence.
uuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh