Last Day: Parting Thoughts
"What are you doing for the rest of your life...?"
I brought in fried, glazed croussaints, and they brought in donuts and cupcakes and lemon bars. I adore lemon bars. Some didn't know I was leaving. One in particular, the British, gave me a great hug and a kiss on the cheek and told me to keep in touch. It's amazing how much others think about you when you're leaving. Busy day today, because it's the last.
"North and south and east and west of your life? "
Today is the last day of my life, and Monday will be the precipice of its new beginning. Yes, I know the word "precipice" denotes a beginning in and of itself, but Monday will not be the beginning. Only the interim.
"I have only one request of your life-"
The beginning of my life will happen when I move to DC and get a career. Something I'll do strongly and proudly for the next 10... 20... 30... years of my life. When I publish my first novel (yes, I've decided), when I start my first business, when I marry and have children. Then my life will truly begin.
"That you spend it all with me."
This? This is just setup. This is what happens when you thought your life began years ago and you weren't prepared to handle it. This is catching up. This is killing myself, so I can be made anew. This is suicide of childish things developed in a prolix process of laziness and dependency.
"Through all of my life.."
This is realizing that just because adulthood wasn't forced on me doesn't mean I shouldn't reach out to embrace it. This is refusing not to become like my mother, no matter how much I love her. This is creating my own legacy and doing whatever I have to do to make it happen. This is long days, longer commutes, short sleeping hours, strained friendships, monstrous cell phone bills, bad diets, nervousness and stress, short term disappointments for long term benefits. This is benefits. And more pay. And perhaps a 3rd job. And perhaps a 4th... And-
"Summer, winter, spring and fall of my life,"
This is me preparing for the rest of my life, by ending the one I have now. I'll go through this fire and come out as gold, but still very hot to the touch, and when I do, I hope to see you there.
"All I ever will recall of my life"
"Is all of my life with you."
I brought in fried, glazed croussaints, and they brought in donuts and cupcakes and lemon bars. I adore lemon bars. Some didn't know I was leaving. One in particular, the British, gave me a great hug and a kiss on the cheek and told me to keep in touch. It's amazing how much others think about you when you're leaving. Busy day today, because it's the last.
"North and south and east and west of your life? "
Today is the last day of my life, and Monday will be the precipice of its new beginning. Yes, I know the word "precipice" denotes a beginning in and of itself, but Monday will not be the beginning. Only the interim.
"I have only one request of your life-"
The beginning of my life will happen when I move to DC and get a career. Something I'll do strongly and proudly for the next 10... 20... 30... years of my life. When I publish my first novel (yes, I've decided), when I start my first business, when I marry and have children. Then my life will truly begin.
"That you spend it all with me."
This? This is just setup. This is what happens when you thought your life began years ago and you weren't prepared to handle it. This is catching up. This is killing myself, so I can be made anew. This is suicide of childish things developed in a prolix process of laziness and dependency.
"Through all of my life.."
This is realizing that just because adulthood wasn't forced on me doesn't mean I shouldn't reach out to embrace it. This is refusing not to become like my mother, no matter how much I love her. This is creating my own legacy and doing whatever I have to do to make it happen. This is long days, longer commutes, short sleeping hours, strained friendships, monstrous cell phone bills, bad diets, nervousness and stress, short term disappointments for long term benefits. This is benefits. And more pay. And perhaps a 3rd job. And perhaps a 4th... And-
"Summer, winter, spring and fall of my life,"
This is me preparing for the rest of my life, by ending the one I have now. I'll go through this fire and come out as gold, but still very hot to the touch, and when I do, I hope to see you there.
"All I ever will recall of my life"
"Is all of my life with you."