Fic: Twelve Random Facts About the Demon Crowley
Companion piece to Twelve Random Facts About the Angel Aziraphale.
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Twelve Random Facts About the Demon Crowley
1. Just because he never meant to Fall doesn't mean he never meant to do what he did to get there.
2. The first thing to cross his mind upon meeting the angel Aziraphale is a cocktail of terror and
awe at the way apparently any idiot with wings can get their hands on a fiery sword these days.
The second is that Aziraphale could probably teach the sword a lesson or two in flaming.
3. Look, she didn't have to eat that apple, all right?
4. Immediately following the marked lack of Apocalypse, he returns to his flat and spends three
hours on his knees outside the study, scrubbing at the stain Ligur left on the carpet. He tries not to
think about which is more disturbing-the fact that Adam apparently felt Crowley deserved to remember
what he did, or the fact that he apparently didn’t feel Ligur deserved to remember anything at all.
5. His favourite pudding is tiramisu, but he always ends up ordering the chocolate torte.
6. If he could do it all over again somehow, he’d sleep through the twentieth century instead.
7. When Aziraphale decides to find out what falling in love is like, Crowley does not turn him down.
They have shared so many first times between them already, and frankly, Crowley is grateful not
to have to be the one that does the tempting for a change.
8. Obviously, the only reason he ever puts the Meat Loaf on is to scare the piggyback plants.
9. He saw Dirty Harry for the twenty-sixth time last Tuesday.
10. Hastur still makes him sign “Dominic Applebottom” to all official communication.
11. Aziraphale says he doesn’t mind if Crowley wants to sleep with other people every so often, but
Crowley buys him that ridiculous Regency snuff box for Christmas anyway-the one with the castle
scene and the mother-of-pearl base, because Aziraphale is hardly one to be strict with Leviticus.
12. The fictional character he most identifies with is Job.