(no subject)
What a terrifying experience. I am living abck at my old house on pond place lane. Some guy was in the crawlspace talking about how much he hated someone who was using the bathroom at the time. The person in the bathroom could hear the guy talking shit through the vents, and got really mad about it. I did the person in the crawlspace a huge favor by knocking out the guy while still on the toilet and throwing him on the couch to rest for a while. In the meantime, i filled the toilet with chocolate pudding. Once the man from the bathroom came to, he didnt remember a thing, but we showed him the toilet and laughed about it. Its so weird what happened next, I hope i can pull this off in the way i describe it.
Basically, a blind man came to my house. His eyes had been removed by his parents when he was a kid for some strange, or bizarre reason, and he had these big gaping holes hidden beneath scar tissue, and sunglasses, like the kind I would wear. I felt like I had known him for a long time, so I let him in. My driveway was full of cars I didnt recognize, and there were at least 10 of them. I took the blind man in the garage where all of us were talking about the war. it was me, matt and andy from work, and some people i didnt know, but seemed cool. The blind man had an opinion on everything, not only did he have an opinion about everything, but i swear to god, he knew things about every one of us that were exactly right. He claimed that her gained this knowledge about reading people from the church of the samoans. I had no idea what he was talking about, and I figured it was time for everyone to leave. One everyone left, I went and saw my mom, who gave me some stupidly weird chocolate drink mix, and told me people had been terrorizing them late at night, and that i absolutely need to take care of it. Her idea of me taking care of it was to drink the powder she gave me, and then showing up at their house around midnight. The next thing i know, im hovering over the opened trunk of my car, fumbling around trying to mix this drink with milk, when a car pulls up, and drives directly on my parents front lawn and starts peeling out and ripping up the grass. Im all like, "Huh?!" and ran over to them. They got out of the car and I was just yelling at them for a while. I ran inside my parents house, and grabbed a baseball bat and went back outside. By the time I got outside, the 2 people that were in the car before had turned into 5 people. I just went crazy and started swinging it at peopleI think i nearly killed 2 of them, and then i attacked the car to the point where the radiator blew up. I wanted to get out of there before the cops were called, so i went back to the pond place house where i was met by the blind man.
I have no idea why he was at my house, or what he was doing, he just grabbed me and threw me inside. I noticed matt was there too for some reason, and he was crying. Apparently his brother got killed in the war. I asked the blind man what was going on, and he told me i was better off not knowing. I also asked him how he knew so much about everything, and his response was the same, but he did ask me if i had any questions about anything. Since he seemed to know EVERYTHING, i asked "What killed off the dinosaurs?" He responded "The church of the samoans"
"WTF" I thought.
This guy seemed legitimate, and now he was preaching to me about his god damned church?! I got kinda pissed, and wanted him to leave. He argued a moment trying to explain himself, and i seriously thought he was full of shit, until he did something i never would have expected.
Spoke in a stern voice "Montreal canadians jersey, number 16"
MAtt just looked up at him like he was a ghost, and i looked and matt and was like "Huh?"
As little of a deal as it was, matt stood up, and started taking off his poofy black jacket to reveal a montreal canadians jersey, with a big 16 on the back. The reason this was impressive was because this dude was fucking blind for one thing, not just like "im wearing sunglasses, and pretending." No, this guy had NO eyes.
I was ready to sit down and listen now. In order to explain this to me, he put his hand on my head and told me to close my eyes. I do, and suddenly im seeing images of these 7 foot tall, faceless alien like creatures surrounding a giant bonfire. They were freaky looking. Completely grey, naked, and skinny. Meanwhile, the blind man was narrating. "We were not the first to inhabit this planet, nor will we be the last" Then i saw dinosaurs rampaging around like you would expect, but then i see a space craft of somekind overhead. It releases some black ball from its self and disappears. Im watching this black ball descend to the ground, and once it hits the ground i see a giant blinding flash, and open my eyes. I look at the blind dude and he says "That is the so called meteor that killed the dinosaurs. A bomb more powerful than any ever known to man, sent by the church of the samoans." I was freaking out. This guy was messed up, and i wanted to know more. He told us about his past, about how he got kidnapped from his bedroom when he was a kid, and taken in by the church of the samoans. They removed his eyes in order to heighten his other senses, and to make him more like them, since they had no facial features themselves. They re programmed his brain and all kinda of crap. And then he warned me of a new war that i was likely to fight in. I told him that if a war ever broke out, id go to canada. HE told me to turn on the news at this point. "I had a feeling you would say that" he said as the news station tuned in. the banner read "Mysterious explosions in canada" I thought this was like some war of the worlds type thing, and it was. Kind of stupid.
He took me for a walk up the street to explain things to me, about how this church of his wants the earth back, and how humans are too violent to share the planet, as i assume the dinosaurs were. We get to the top of pond place, and i see a huge fireball go up over the trees. He told me that this is just the beginning, and warned me that if i fall asleep again, I would continue this dream.
That is a fucked up dream i just had. Im scared to fall back asleep now.
Basically, a blind man came to my house. His eyes had been removed by his parents when he was a kid for some strange, or bizarre reason, and he had these big gaping holes hidden beneath scar tissue, and sunglasses, like the kind I would wear. I felt like I had known him for a long time, so I let him in. My driveway was full of cars I didnt recognize, and there were at least 10 of them. I took the blind man in the garage where all of us were talking about the war. it was me, matt and andy from work, and some people i didnt know, but seemed cool. The blind man had an opinion on everything, not only did he have an opinion about everything, but i swear to god, he knew things about every one of us that were exactly right. He claimed that her gained this knowledge about reading people from the church of the samoans. I had no idea what he was talking about, and I figured it was time for everyone to leave. One everyone left, I went and saw my mom, who gave me some stupidly weird chocolate drink mix, and told me people had been terrorizing them late at night, and that i absolutely need to take care of it. Her idea of me taking care of it was to drink the powder she gave me, and then showing up at their house around midnight. The next thing i know, im hovering over the opened trunk of my car, fumbling around trying to mix this drink with milk, when a car pulls up, and drives directly on my parents front lawn and starts peeling out and ripping up the grass. Im all like, "Huh?!" and ran over to them. They got out of the car and I was just yelling at them for a while. I ran inside my parents house, and grabbed a baseball bat and went back outside. By the time I got outside, the 2 people that were in the car before had turned into 5 people. I just went crazy and started swinging it at peopleI think i nearly killed 2 of them, and then i attacked the car to the point where the radiator blew up. I wanted to get out of there before the cops were called, so i went back to the pond place house where i was met by the blind man.
I have no idea why he was at my house, or what he was doing, he just grabbed me and threw me inside. I noticed matt was there too for some reason, and he was crying. Apparently his brother got killed in the war. I asked the blind man what was going on, and he told me i was better off not knowing. I also asked him how he knew so much about everything, and his response was the same, but he did ask me if i had any questions about anything. Since he seemed to know EVERYTHING, i asked "What killed off the dinosaurs?" He responded "The church of the samoans"
"WTF" I thought.
This guy seemed legitimate, and now he was preaching to me about his god damned church?! I got kinda pissed, and wanted him to leave. He argued a moment trying to explain himself, and i seriously thought he was full of shit, until he did something i never would have expected.
Spoke in a stern voice "Montreal canadians jersey, number 16"
MAtt just looked up at him like he was a ghost, and i looked and matt and was like "Huh?"
As little of a deal as it was, matt stood up, and started taking off his poofy black jacket to reveal a montreal canadians jersey, with a big 16 on the back. The reason this was impressive was because this dude was fucking blind for one thing, not just like "im wearing sunglasses, and pretending." No, this guy had NO eyes.
I was ready to sit down and listen now. In order to explain this to me, he put his hand on my head and told me to close my eyes. I do, and suddenly im seeing images of these 7 foot tall, faceless alien like creatures surrounding a giant bonfire. They were freaky looking. Completely grey, naked, and skinny. Meanwhile, the blind man was narrating. "We were not the first to inhabit this planet, nor will we be the last" Then i saw dinosaurs rampaging around like you would expect, but then i see a space craft of somekind overhead. It releases some black ball from its self and disappears. Im watching this black ball descend to the ground, and once it hits the ground i see a giant blinding flash, and open my eyes. I look at the blind dude and he says "That is the so called meteor that killed the dinosaurs. A bomb more powerful than any ever known to man, sent by the church of the samoans." I was freaking out. This guy was messed up, and i wanted to know more. He told us about his past, about how he got kidnapped from his bedroom when he was a kid, and taken in by the church of the samoans. They removed his eyes in order to heighten his other senses, and to make him more like them, since they had no facial features themselves. They re programmed his brain and all kinda of crap. And then he warned me of a new war that i was likely to fight in. I told him that if a war ever broke out, id go to canada. HE told me to turn on the news at this point. "I had a feeling you would say that" he said as the news station tuned in. the banner read "Mysterious explosions in canada" I thought this was like some war of the worlds type thing, and it was. Kind of stupid.
He took me for a walk up the street to explain things to me, about how this church of his wants the earth back, and how humans are too violent to share the planet, as i assume the dinosaurs were. We get to the top of pond place, and i see a huge fireball go up over the trees. He told me that this is just the beginning, and warned me that if i fall asleep again, I would continue this dream.
That is a fucked up dream i just had. Im scared to fall back asleep now.