Life goes on, for some.
Well I'll just say it outright. My grandad died, after his heart surgery he didn't wake up, it was determined that he had a massive stroke, most likely due to some of the calcification in his heart breaking free as a result of te operation. Either way he was at very high risk so there is no blame to be placed. I found out a few interesting things, My Father and uncles had very VERY poor relationships with my grandad, even worse relationships with his wife (whom may actualy have desirved the spite) and I really didn't know him al that well. I still Grieve for him, and it's made me think about a few things, and it makes me worry even more for my Nena. so the bad news has been steady. Garths death, The fact that I just barely, as in within a few dollars can afford my uni costs, and now my Grandads death. The good news is that the issue with my fees should be resolved, the government owes me a $500 bursary and I intend to see to it that I get that money.
All I can say is all in all life is normal, the sun will rise and I will go about my day and the sun will set. I do however intend to star making sure the days are more worth while, I put FAR to much off untill later and eventualy there won't be a later, be it a deadlines arrival or death. Carpe Diem I suppose. I don't know really what to think. I've been down all month and I've just been using odd little affirmations to keep my mood up and motivate me, though the deaths in my family have effected me deeply, more than anything the motivate me to actualy do something with life, I have a goal My brother and I are the last generation to carry our last name and none of my uncles seem are likely to have children. Also my brother and I are likly to be the first men bearing the name to graduate university. As always I'm being long winded but that's just how I tend to be, I guess what I'm saying is Though I'm depressed I've found goals and motivation in an unlikely place and I feel that for once I am succeeding in some small way, this is a very rare feeling for me and one I'm not liable to let go of any time soon. Though on a down note, there is bloody nothing to do in the town!!! I wan't to organize more roleplaying or maybe go out to the clubs once in a while bu I rarely seem to have the opporotunity I am thankful for having a campaigne to run but it's fatiguing to run for no less that 8 hours at a time, and I want the chance to be a PC in a literate and well developed story again.
Now the things I've been putting off, I'm going back to kung fu as of next week, most likely monday. I have plenty of work to fill my time between class tomorrow, Gaming after class. This weekend I'll be going skiing with my cousin before she's off to shanghi to teach for a year or two.
Oh Raiva and Tsireal What are the odds there'd be space for me on that spring break trip, I promise I won't be mopey like last time.
All I can say is all in all life is normal, the sun will rise and I will go about my day and the sun will set. I do however intend to star making sure the days are more worth while, I put FAR to much off untill later and eventualy there won't be a later, be it a deadlines arrival or death. Carpe Diem I suppose. I don't know really what to think. I've been down all month and I've just been using odd little affirmations to keep my mood up and motivate me, though the deaths in my family have effected me deeply, more than anything the motivate me to actualy do something with life, I have a goal My brother and I are the last generation to carry our last name and none of my uncles seem are likely to have children. Also my brother and I are likly to be the first men bearing the name to graduate university. As always I'm being long winded but that's just how I tend to be, I guess what I'm saying is Though I'm depressed I've found goals and motivation in an unlikely place and I feel that for once I am succeeding in some small way, this is a very rare feeling for me and one I'm not liable to let go of any time soon. Though on a down note, there is bloody nothing to do in the town!!! I wan't to organize more roleplaying or maybe go out to the clubs once in a while bu I rarely seem to have the opporotunity I am thankful for having a campaigne to run but it's fatiguing to run for no less that 8 hours at a time, and I want the chance to be a PC in a literate and well developed story again.
Now the things I've been putting off, I'm going back to kung fu as of next week, most likely monday. I have plenty of work to fill my time between class tomorrow, Gaming after class. This weekend I'll be going skiing with my cousin before she's off to shanghi to teach for a year or two.
Oh Raiva and Tsireal What are the odds there'd be space for me on that spring break trip, I promise I won't be mopey like last time.