I'm a | liar.
"Her smile was fake, like a piece of paper with a smile drawn on it had been glued to her face." - Twisted, by Laurie Halse Anderson.
I'm a liar.
I'm a bad person.
I hate myself.
I cry all the time.
I make myself sick.
I want it to be over.
I'm afraid.
I miss you.
I make bad decisions.
I hurt people.
I am delusional.
I have depression.
I break promises.
I fail.
I drink too much.
I smoke too much.
My heart hurts.
But most of all?
I'm sorry.
I'm sick of lying to myself. Sick of pretending to be okay when I would give almost anthing to not be here. I hate it. I wish and try and pray to a God that I have never really believed in to help me. To let me see the silver lining. I can't see it anymore. The only time I don't fake it is when I read and write, the rest of the time? I'm wearing a mask. I very fake and very deliberate mask. I cand feel anything anymore. I live in the hazy half world between awake and asleep. I'm stuck between life and death, and I don't even have enough left to care. That's my secret.
"I leaned closer to the glass. The guy in the mirror looked like somebody had wrapped his heart in barbed wire and pulled." - Twisted, by Laurie Halse Anderson.
I'm a liar.
I'm a bad person.
I hate myself.
I cry all the time.
I make myself sick.
I want it to be over.
I'm afraid.
I miss you.
I make bad decisions.
I hurt people.
I am delusional.
I have depression.
I break promises.
I fail.
I drink too much.
I smoke too much.
My heart hurts.
But most of all?
I'm sorry.
I'm sick of lying to myself. Sick of pretending to be okay when I would give almost anthing to not be here. I hate it. I wish and try and pray to a God that I have never really believed in to help me. To let me see the silver lining. I can't see it anymore. The only time I don't fake it is when I read and write, the rest of the time? I'm wearing a mask. I very fake and very deliberate mask. I cand feel anything anymore. I live in the hazy half world between awake and asleep. I'm stuck between life and death, and I don't even have enough left to care. That's my secret.
"I leaned closer to the glass. The guy in the mirror looked like somebody had wrapped his heart in barbed wire and pulled." - Twisted, by Laurie Halse Anderson.