Veering Way off to the Right | T | HG

[step_fics]

Title: Veering Way Off to the Right. At Speed. Way off. Like, so far over there it’s not even funny. Or is it?
For: Myself, because I needed to laugh.
Chapter Rating: T
Chapter Warnings: Lolz
Featured Characters/Pairings: Hermione, Mattie
Chapter Word Count: 1,872
Summary: Hermione gets a couple of surprises when working late one night.
Author's

Comments

[maybe1ce]

It's OK, I mean, if you like that sort of thing, but, I'm a little disappointed.

It's just so...EXPECTED, you know? It would be better if you had Hermione punch Mattie in the babymaker, and then run off to get back with Ron, only then she'd get in a car accident on the way and lose her memory and end up marrying a Muggle who turns out to be DRACO MALFOY who is in hiding and he knows its her but he doesn't say anything because he's loved her all along! And, then, you could have it turn out that she has some kind of disease and Draco has to take her to St. Mungos and Ron sees her while he's there waiting for Mattie to get her babymaker fixed and he realizes that he loves Hermione but she doesn't remember him and she loves Draco now! But then, Mattie comes out and her love sparkle vampireness makes Draco love her because he's part Veela and she can't resist him and so they leave and Ron and Hermione realize they belong together and then they wake up in their own bed because it was all a dream.

But, whatever. It's your story.

[urbanmama1]

Yes, this please. lol. Thanks to both you (and maybe1ce) for the snort-aloud laughing going on over here in the DC suburbs. I'm sure wherever you both are, you can hear my throaty laughter.

But wait, I wanted one of Hermione's chair-legs to fall off and accidentally impale Mattie, who would explode True Blood style before her eyes. THEN she could magically clean her up and obliviate herself. Can you add that in somehow? Thanks.

[shocolate]

'Well, I suppose that's not the worst way someone has reacted when I've told them I am in fact the Living Dead so I'll take it. Trust you to go with logic before emotion, though!'

Awesome.

Mattie doesn't sleep - she has time to shag them both.

But... it's lacking something... where was the Draco in leather trousers?

[shygryf]

lol. I know you said caffeine was good for writing but perhaps there is such a thing as too much?

sorry, couldn't resist

this was brilliant and funny and now I need an obliviate because from now on I will be convinced Mattie is a sparkly vampire.